I’m sure most of you know what an oxymoron is. It’s a figure of speech that seems to contradict itself. There are lists and lists of the things, and here are some of my favorites: Artificial Grass, boneless ribs, big town, harmless lie, communist party, green oranges, easy labor, fresh frozen, jumbo shrimp, cafeteria food, military intelligence, one choice, random order, slumber party, freezer burn, small fortune, government organization, living dead, same difference, plastic glasses, peace force, pretty ugly, head butt, working vacation, Dodge Ram, work party, healthy tan, good grief, and devout atheist, as well as its sequel, Thank God I’m an Atheist.
Chapter 5 of the book of Revelation gives us another oxymoron. Something that sounds impossible, but yet it is still true. (www.oxymoronlists.com)

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Category: Humor

(374 ratings)

Topic: Book of Revelation, Church: Practices, Second Coming

Scripture:

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Hymns Of The Laodicean Church
(God’s Frozen People)

The Laodicean Church announces publication of "Church Songs," whose title, according to the editor, was chosen because "We didn’t want to turn anybody off with threatening words that no one understands anymore like ’worship’ or ’hymn.’ People in today’s society get kind of uncomfortable with too much talk about things like commitment and dedication. They’d much rather have a religion that they can turn on or off at will. Our book seeks to meet that need."

Table Of Contents:

A Comfy Mattress Is Our God
Above Average is Thy Faithfulness
All Hail the Influence of Jesus’ Name

Amazing Grace, How Interesting the Sound

Be Thou My Hobby
Blest Be the Tie That Doesn’t Cramp My Style

God of Taste, and God of Stories

He’s Quite a Bit to Me

I Lay My Inappropriate Behaviors on Jesus
I Surrender Some
I’m Fairly Certain That My Redeemer Lives

Joyful, Joyful, We Kinda Like Thee

Lift Every Voice and Intellectualize
Lord, Keep Us Loosely Connected to Your Word

My Faith Looks Around for Thee
My Hope is Built on Nothing Much

O God, Our Enabler in Ages Past
Oh, for a Couple of Tongues to Sing
Oh, How I Like Jesus

Pillow of Ages, Fluffed for Me
Praise God from Whom All Affirmations Flow

Self-Este...