Illustration results for Love, Marriage, Wedding
Here’s a list of all variations of the "God Speaks" billboards that appeared in the Metropolitan Dallas-Fort Worth area. The billboards are a simple black background with white text. No fine print or sponsoring organization is included. The sponsorship for these “God Speaks” billboards is anonymous.
“Let’s meet at my house Sunday before the game.” - God
“C’mon over and bring the kids.” - God
“What part of "Thou Shalt Not...didn’t you understand?” - God
“We need to talk.” - God
“Keep using my name in vain, I’ll make rush hour longer.” - God
“Loved the wedding, invite me to the marriage.” - God
“That `Love Thy Neighbor‘ thing... I meant it.” - God
“I love you and you and you and you and... “ - God
“Will the road you’re on get you to my place?” - God
“Follow me.” -God
“Big bang theory, you’ve got to be kidding.” - God
“My way is the highway.” - God
“Need directions?” - God
“You think it’s hot here?” - God
“Have you read my #1 best seller? There will be a test.” - God
“Do you have any idea where you’re going?” - God
And now here is one “God Speaks” that we might apply to ourselves in our daily life:
"Don’t make me come down there.” - God
A little boy was attending his first wedding.
After the service his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?"
"Sixteen(16)", was his prompt reply.
"How do u know that?" asked the cousin.
"Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up."
Preacher said, "4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer!"
The boys were setting themselves up for moral corruption.
God’s people must be morally pure.
Questions about love, marriage and sex were posed to kids ages 5 to 10. Here are a few of their responses:
WHAT IS THE PROPER AGE TO GET MARRIED?
(Judy, 8) “Eight-four. Because at that age, you don’t have to work anymore, and you can spend all your time loving each other in your bedroom.”
WHEN IS IT OK TO KISS SOMEONE?
(Jim, 10) “You should never kiss a girl unless you have enough bucks to buy her a ring and her own VCR, ‘cause she’ll want to have videos of the wedding.”
HOW CAN PEOPLE MAKE LOVE LAST?
(Roger, 8) “Don’t forget your wife’s name. That will mess up the love.”
A young couple, very much in love, were getting married in church. However, Sue the wife was very nervous about the big occasion and so the vicar chose one verse that he felt would be a great encouragement to them.
The verse was 1 Jn 4:18 which says:
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear” ( Jn 4:18)
Rather unwisely, the vicar asked the best man to read it out and to say that the vicar had felt that this was a very apt verse for Sue and that he would be preaching on it later in the service.
However the best man was not a regular churchgoer. And so he did not know the difference between John’s Gospel and the first lette...
One of the worst things we can do is have an unrealistic expectation that life will be without trouble. Several years ago I had a young couple in my office who wanted me to perform their wedding. I told them to do so, would require them to complete our pre-marital counseling. The girl looked at me and said, “Oh, we won’t need that. I know that other couples have problems in their marriage but we won’t... we love each other too much,” and they looked at each other all starry eyed. I wanted to say, “Boy! You don’t know how much you need this counseling!”
If you do any of the shopping, probably the strangest part is at the checkout. (No offence yvone). The magazine section there is perhaps the strangest collection in print. One favourite is the Hollywood marriage and divorce scene. Some of the comments on the circus include:
• In Hollywood they get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.
• The hardest thing in Hollywood is to keep the marriage a secret until the divorce leaks out.
• I was invited to a Hollywood wedding. Traffic was heavy, so I got there late -- just in time for the divorce.
• One Hollywood kid has good reason to be proud: at the last PTA meeting, he won the prize for having the most parents there.
• One actress is very sentimental: she always gets divorced in the dress her mother was married in.
• A Hollywood bride looked around as the groom put her down after carrying her across the threshold. Puzzled, the Hollywood bride said, "This place looks familiar. Have we been married before?".
The stars themselves tend to be the most self-deprecating:
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
-- Rodney Dangerfield
"My wife loves to shop. Spends all my money. One week she was sick -- three stores went out of business. The woman will bring home anything marked down. Last week she brought home an escalator. She said she lost her purse and all her credit cards were in it. Did I report them stolen? No -- the thief spends less than she does. Take my wife -- please!"
-- Henny Youngman
NO SECRETS HERE
A young couple decided to wed. As the big day approached, they grew apprehensive. Each had a problem they had never before shared with anyone, not even each other.
The Groom-to-be, overcoming his fear, decided to ask his father for advice. "Father," he said, "I am deeply concerned about the success of my marriage. I love my fiancée, very much, but you see, I have very smelly feet, and I’m afraid that my future wife will be put off by them."
"No problem," said dad. "All you have to do is wash your feet as often as possible, and always wear socks, even to bed." Well, to him this seemed a workable solution.
The bride-to-be, overcoming her fear, decided to take her problem up her mom. "Mom," she said, "When I wake up in the morning my breath is truly awful." "Honey," her mother consoled, "everyone has bad breath in the morning." "No, you don’t understand. My morning breath is so bad, I’m afraid that my new husband will not want to sleep in the same room with me."
Her mother said simply, "Try this. In the morning, get straight out of bed, and head for the bathroom and brush your teeth. The key is, not to say a word until you’ve brushed your teeth. Not a word," her mother affirmed. Well, she thought it was certainly worth a try.
The loving couple was finally married in a beautiful ceremony. Not forgetting the advice each had received, he with his perpetual socks and she with her...
The bride was very nervous. It was right before the wedding and she wasn’t sure she could even walk down aisle. So her father gave her some words of wisdom. He said to her.
“There’s only three things you need to focus on. If you focus on these three things, you’ll be fine.
The first is walking down the aisle. Just focus on walking down the aisle of the church. I know it’s rather long, but just concentrate on that. Don’t get caught up with those on either side of the aisle. Just focus on getting to the end of the aisle.
Next, focus on the altar. It is your destination today. Make your way down the aisle to the altar. There you will stand before God with the man you love and will make vows to God and him. Focus on the altar –for the altar represents the love God has for you in Jesus Christ.
Lastly, focus on the hymn just before signing of the Register. In poetry and song, the hymn embodies God’s love for you in Christ, your love for your husband and his love for you.
So, to help you not be so nervous, focus on those three things.
Walking down the AISLE,
Standing before the ALTAR and
Listening to the HYMN.
The bride was very tha...