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A book that has changed my life is What’s So Amazing About Grace? In it the author, Philip Yancey quotes Mark Twain. Apparently Twain used to say he put a dog and a cat in a cage together as an experiment, to see if they could get along. They did, so he put in a bird, pig and goat. They, too, got along fine after a few adjustments. Then he put in a Baptist, Presbyterian, and Catholic; soon there was not a living thing left.
In this area it might be Baptist, Pentecostal and Catholic. But you know, it’s hard enough sometimes for a Wesleyan, a Wesleyan and a Wesleyan to get along.
Let me suggest you consider the difference between dogs and cats. The master pets a dog, and the dog wags its tail and thinks, “He must be a god.” But the master pets his cat, and the cat purrs, shuts its eyes and thinks to itself, “I must be a god.” Though Jesus in grace reached down to us, there is still a perverse human tendency to think like the cat!
"You better watch out, you better not pout, you better not cry, I’m telling you why, Santa Claus is coming to town. He’s making a list, checking it twice, gonna find out who’s naughty and nice, Santa Claus is coming to town. He sees you when you’re sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. He knows when you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake."
I never liked that song as a kid. You can’t fool Santa. He knows it all. Well, great! Then he knows I lied about scratching the car with my bike. He knows I hit my sister. He knows I was cussing up a storm with my friends down the street. He knows it all. That’s just great! What chance do I have for a decent Christmas present now? I might as well just keep on being bad.
You know. That’s how people often look at their lives as Christians. Jesus is coming back. You better watch out - you better be good, cause He knows it all. You better be ready, prepared, faithful, loving, because there’s no fooling Him. And when you look at it this way, any honest person would say, "That’s just great!" Then I have no chance, cause I know I’ve been bad." But that misses the point of the grace of God. Ephesians 2:8-10 tells us that we cannot be good enough to earn God’s favor. Instead, He gives us the gift of eternal life when we believe in Jesus, and He recreates us in Christ so that we can do good things.
In Charles Schultz’s cartoon, “Peanuts,” Lucy is seen saying that if she was in charge of the world, she’d change everything. Charlie says, “That wouldn’t be easy. Where would you start?” Lucy looks directly at him, and without hesitation, points her finger at him and says, “I’d start with you!”
And so it is with those who l...
Friday at quitting time, Jim said,
‘Boss, have you got any extra work I can do tonight?’
Sure do but I can’t pay you overtime.
That’s okay, I just don’t want to go home.
Why not?
Well, I’ve been in the doghouse since last night.
I see...Why? What did you do to deserve that?
I still don’t know, it must be one of those woman things.
I was minding my own business relaxing in front of the TV.
My wife enters the room & asks, "What’s on the TV?"
And honestly, I swear all I said was, "Dust!"
She’s been mad ever since!
The wife found fault with her husband’s grace/truthfulness & forefeited her companionship.
We also forfeit a great deal when the find fault with God’s grace.
How do you feel about people? A pastor arranged for a gathering of the women’s auxiliary. It was to be a garden party on the church lawn, under the old oak. At the last moment, the morning of the party, Mrs. Preacher discovered she left Sister Hissyfit off the invitation list.
The parson called the dear sister and begged forgiveness. I’m so sorry we didn’t catch this sooner, Mrs. Hissyfit, won’t you please come to the garden party? cajoled the pastor. Beggin’ won’t help now, Preacher, said the offended Mrs. H., I’ve already prayed for rain.
Once when Alabama was playing Auburn, Coach Bear Bryant sent in his 2nd string quarterback with instructions to run on every play and he had better not pass the ball. Alabama led by three points and only had to run the clock out to win. Three downs in a row Alabama was crushed. On the fourth down with a few seconds left and Alabama ahead the quarterback took the snap. Looking into the end zone he saw his receiver so open the temptation was too great. He threw the ball only to see it intercepted. Though he was the slowest player on the field the 2nd string quarterback ran down the interceptor and Alabama won the game. After the game coach Dye of Auburn said to Bear Bryant, “How could that boy run down my boy who was so much faster?” “Simple,” answered Bear, “Your boy was running to score a touchdown – my boy was running to keep me from killing him!”
No One Expected Me!
I dreamed death came the other night
And heaven’s gate swung wide.
With kindly grace an angel fair
Ushered me inside.
And there, to my astonishment
Stood folks I’d known on earth.
Some I’d judged and labeled as
“Unfit”, “Of little worth”.
Indignant words rose to ...
In a Scottish cemetery the following epitaph appears on a new tombstone:
Here lies Hamish McTavish,
Whose deeply sorrowing widow continues
To carry on his flourishing greengrocery business
At 11 High Street
Open daily until 8:oo
A pastor and his wife decide to have the church deacons and their wives over for dinner. It was quite an undertaking, but the pastor and his wife want to be "Salt and Light" for the leaders of their church. When it comes time for dinner, everyone is seated and the pastor's wife asks her little four year old daughter if she will say grace. (As a note to new parents: Don't do this!)
The girl says "I don't know what to say."
Her mom tells her, "Just say what I say honey."
Everyone bows their head and the little girl says, "O dear Lord, why am I having all these people over for dinner! Amen!"
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