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Illustration results for second chance

Contributed By:
Richard Crow
 
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The Department of Social Services in Greenville County, South Carolina sent the following letter to a deceased individual. "Your food stamps will be stopped effective March, 1992, because we received notice that you passed away. May God bless you. You may reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
There is no second chance!!

 
Contributed By:
Steve Malone
 
Scripture:
none
 

Today, is Father’s Day “Happy Father’s Day!” I thought I’d start out today by sharing a few precious dad moments.. Moments that would only happen to a dad and only a dad would appreciate…

PRECIOUS DAD MOMENT #1

One night a wife found her husband standing over their newborn baby’s crib. Silently she watched him. As he stood looking down at the sleeping infant, she saw on his face a mixture of emotions: disbelief, doubt, delight, amazement, enchantment, skepticism. He would stand back, shake his head and say, "Amazing," while smiling from ear to ear.

Touched by his unusual display and the deep emotions it aroused, her eyes glistened as she slipped her arms around him. "A penny for your thoughts," she whispered in his ear.

"Isn’t it amazing!" he replied. "When you take the time and really look close, how can anyone make a crib like that for only $45.99!"

PRECIOUS DAD MOMENT #2

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of ham, a fresh bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. The corners of my jaw were aching in anticipation,
I carried it to the picnic table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side. "Hold Johnny, (our six-week-old son), while I get my sandwich," she said.

I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers. I love mustard. And I had no napkin. So I licked it off.

It was NOT mustard. No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand I did the sort of routine shoeshine guys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later my wife said, "Now you know why they call that mustard ’Poupon.’"

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Contributed By:
Sermon Central Staff
 
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THE SHEEP DOG

A man by the name of Keith Miller told of the time when his daughters were very young. They’d drop them off at the church’s children’s chapel on Sundays before the 11 am service. But one day Keith chanced to be in the class when the preacher was telling the story for the day to the kids.

The preacher was talking to the children about sheep. He said that sheep weren’t very clever and needed lots of guidance and that a shepherd’s job was to stay close to the sheep, protect them from wild animals and keep them from wandering off and doing foolish things that would get them hurt or killed.

He pointed to the children in the room and said that they were the sheep and needed lots of guidance. Then the minister put his hands out to the side, palms up in a dramatic gesture, and with raised eyebrows said to the children, "If you are the sheep then who is the shepherd?"
He was pretty obviously indicating himself.

A silence of a few seconds followed. Th...

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Contributed By:
Davon Huss
 
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none
 

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Country Music Song Titles:
1. If You Can’t Live Without Me, Why Aren’t You Dead?
2. I Went Back to My Fourth Wife for the Third Time and Gave Her a Second Chance to Make a First Class Fool Out of Me
3. You’re the Reason Our Kids are Ugly
4. I’m Ashamed to Be Here, but Not Ashamed Enough to Leave
5. If My Nose Was Running Money, Honey, I’d Blow It Al On You
6. You Were Only A Splinter As I Slid Down The Banister Of Life
7. You Ain’t Much Fun Since I Quit Drinkin’
8. I Would Kiss You Through the Screendoor but It’d Strain Our Love
9. I Wouldn’t Take Her to a Dogfight, Even if I thought She Could WinThank God that Gospel Music has such a positive and ...

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