Checkpoints For Marriage Series

CHECKPOINTS FOR MARRIAGE

A STUDY OVER THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT: PART XIII (TOPIC: DATING)

INTRO: Explain the mega-Bible conference I went to down in Texas, and how much of this info was given in one of the main talks geared towards fathers.

BIBLE VERSE: Matthew 5:27-28

You have heard that it was said, “Do not commit adultery.” But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

TRANSITION: Today we are talking about relationships, and it is vital to discuss how to have correct relationships with others of the opposite gender prior to marriage so that we know exactly who we are looking for as a suitable helper.

BIBLE VERSE: 2 CORINTHIANS 6:14

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?

CATTLE EXAMPLE: Imagine if two cows were working in the field, one of them alive, and one of the dead, if they were yoked together, which direction would they go? They go around in circles, and it is ridiculous.

This is what happens time and time again when a Christian and non-Christian date (not to mention they usually end up at a party together, or committing sin together, or whatever).

DO NOT DATE/MARRY A NON-CHRISTIAN: Discussion time…any questions?

TRANSITION: I believe that the reason most young relationships fail miserably is exactly based on this point. The Christian date a non-Christian argument has been around for years, and I hear it all the time. Look, we have to understand that someone who is alive is different than someone who is alive, someone who is dead is different than someone who is alive.

EXAMPLE: I am a great, lost person…when I am driving. Unlike most males, I pull over quickly, ask directions anywhere, and get back on the road (actually, I pull over so well it can be annoying because sometimes what I am looking for is right around the corner).

PASTOR ANDY STANLEY ON GETTING LOST…

“The upside to all of this is that I can speak as an authority on the art of getting and being lost. There are three things you should know about those of us who are directionally challenged. First, we don’t get lost on purpose. Nobody does that. In fact, just the opposite is true. Since we know we are likely to get lost, we work hard at paying attention and following directions. But we just don’t do well in unfamiliar territory.

The second thing I’ve learned from getting lost is that I never know exactly when it happens. I never know when I’ve crossed that line between I know exactly where I am and I have no idea where I am. I never know the precise moment in which I’ve made an incorrect turn or taken a wrong route. There is never a moment when a light goes off in my brain and I think, Gee, I just got lost. If I back up a hundred feet, I’ll be un-lost. Being lost is something that dawns on me. Usually after I’ve been lost for…well, I don’t know how long I’m lost before I realize I’m lost. Which I guess is the point I’m trying to make.

There’s a third thing about getting lost. The road I’m on always determines where I end up. Pretty insightful, eh? It really doesn’t matter where I intended to be; the path I take determines my ultimate destination. Plans, intentions, spousal expectations…none of that counts. I always end up where the road I’ve chosen takes me.”

HERE’S THE DEAL…BEING A CHRISTIAN IS NOT ONE OF THE 3 CHECKPOINTS…IT IS ASSUMED! In order to find your suitable helper, it begins with a Christian, that is the lowest step on the stepladder, and that is what so many people settle for in USA. “I am not sure that my daughter is marrying a good guy, he says he is a Christian, but I cannot be so certain.”

CHECKPOINT #1: THE LOVE CHECK

BIBLE VERSE: Matthew 22:37 Jesus said to him, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.”

POINT OUT: Is this statement provided by Jesus, is this a suggestion? Is this a good idea? What is this? This is a command? And if we fail to love in such a way, we are technically sinning.

THE BIG QUESTION: Now this is the tough stuff, if the boy does not love the Lord his God with all his heart, all his soul, and all his mind, can he love your daughter with all his heart, all his soul, and all his mind? No way. So this is the first checkpoint.

LETTER FROM FACEBOOK: ANONYMOUS BUT FROM PUBLIC SETTING (I NEED ADVICE)