Freedom From the Pain of Regret

FREEDOM FROM THE PAIN OF REGRET

INTRODUCTION: Have you ever done anything you’ve regretted? If you’ve ever said, “if only…” or if you’ve spent time in the land of, “woulda, coulda, shoulda” then you probably have regrets. I believe there’s no pain like the pain of regret. (secretregrets.com, book-what if you had a second chance?) The world is full of the pain of regret but we can actually gain freedom from our regrets and move on.

1) What do we regret the most?
• We regret what we say. Matt. 12:36, “But I tell you that men will have to give an account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.” Ever put your foot in your mouth? Ever say something you wish you could’ve grabbed out of the air and stuffed it back into your mouth before it reached the listener’s ears? We often say stupid things. The ‘open mouth-insert foot’ stuff. Like when you ask a woman when she’s due and she says she’s not pregnant. The pain of those moments is usually gone quickly but there are other times when our words are not so easily forgotten by others. Especially when we’re angry or hurt. We get into an argument and say things we regret later. Quote, “Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret”. Sometimes we can mend the wounds but there are times when the wounds we cut with our words are too deep. Wounds that time doesn’t heal. Proverbs 12:18a, “Reckless words pierce like a sword.” We often deal with the pain of regret from what we’ve said to others.
• We regret what we do. Sometimes we make decisions based on how we feel. Sometimes we make decisions on the spur of the moment. Sometimes we make decisions out of our selfishness. And sometimes those choices come back to haunt us. Matt. 27:1-5 (set-up). Dr. Anne Catherine Speckard, of the University of Minnesota, reports the following long-term consequences of abortion: 81% reported preoccupation with the aborted child. 73% reported flashbacks of the abortion experience. 54% recalled nightmares related to the abortion. 23% reported hallucinations related to the abortion. One study showed they are more likely to attempt suicide than other women; in other research, psychiatrists reported negative psychological manifestations in 55% of women who had undergone abortions; and in another study, "even those women who were strongly supportive of the right to abort reacted to their own abortions with regret, anger, embarrassment, fear of disapproval, and even shame. Many of our regrettable decisions are irreversible. We have to live with the fallout from those poor choices and that leads to much regret.
• We regret what we don’t do. As part of a commencement address former First Lady Barbara Bush said the following to a group of graduating college students: "As important as your obligations as a doctor, lawyer, or business leader will be, you are a human being first, and those human connections - with spouses, with children, with friends - are the most important investments you will ever make. At the end of your life, you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict, or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a child, a friend,