Week 3: Lies We Believe About Ourselves
1. Video of a mother who learned to love.
a. Last week we covered “Lies we believe about God.”
b. If we believe things about God that aren’t true, we will believe things about everything else that
aren’t true. Your building is only as good as the foundation you build it upon.
c. This week we will look at some of the lies that we believe about ourselves.
2. Our view of ourselves is often determined by the input and opinions of others.
a. Someone may have told you that you were unattractive, nerdy, unable to sing, overweight, or
b. You may not have realized that you believed them, but you’re the way you live will betray you.
c. A great deal of the way we behave is based upon what we believe about ourselves.
d. So often we fail to connect the dots between the way we behave with what we believe about
ourselves. We seem to think “oh, that’s just the way I am.”
i. When we believe a lie about ourselves, will have a negative impact upon our life.
3. Some of the lies we believe:
a. The first lie is based upon making the wrong conclusion. I’m worthless.
i. Somewhere we developed a self-view that said we were worth---less than someone else.
1. Maybe it was because we didn’t get as good of grades as someone else
2. Maybe it was because we weren’t as athletic. The kids who played sports seemed
more valuable…they got the attention we wanted…so we think that they are
worth more based upon what they do. .
3. As a result we feel that because we aren’t as smart, pretty, tall, trim, athletic…that
we are worth----less.
a. Notice I did not say worth-nothing. I said worth-less.
4. Worth-less-ness comes from the act of comparing ourselves to others and
measuring ourselves by someone else’s standards.
a. It will even lead us to conclude that we aren’t “worthy” of a good spouse,
a wonderful life or a good job.
b. Once we reach this conclusion, we will even self-sabotage our
relationships, our jobs, and even our own dreams.
ii. We often base our conclusion that “we’re worthless” on our feelings instead of the truth.
1. You go to a party and are surrounded by a bunch of seemingly happy strangers,
which only brings back memories of the put-downs you endured at the hands of
the “happy people” you went to school with.
a. So you relive your feelings and take a nose dive.
2. Or you get a phone call from your father or mother or sister or brother and all of
the feelings of worthless-ness come flooding back.
a. It may only take a two word criticism to throw you back into your
3. You call your best friend, or your counselor for reassurance that you are valuable
and special. But it never lasts. The feelings of worthlessness keep sneaking back
4. The truth is that no amount of positive input will ever outweigh the negative lies
that we believe about ourselves.
a. One hundred compliments on how good you look today will be negated by
one suspicious or innocent remark. How do you like my dress? “Oh it
looks okay.” Bam!
Lies – Part 3 Page 1 5/13/2006
iii. Do you ever say, “ “I am so dumb,” or “I can’t believe I did that! Stupid me!”