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Teaching Our Children Respect for God - Part One

(47)

Sermon shared by Russell Brownworth

April 2002
Summary: Lack of respect for God is epidemic. How can we change that? Part One of a three-part series focusing on teaching respect for God, others, self and leaders.
Tags: Faith (add tag)
Denomination: United Methodist
Audience: Believer adults
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your children with respect because they learn more by your actions toward them than by your verbal statements of values or expectations. Let them express their own opinions and tastes. Apologize to your child if your behavior is out of control.
* Expect respect. Parental respect partly must be earned, but mostly it is a right that comes with your humanity and is ordered in the Ten Commandments. Begin thinking of respect as a value in your family, because without it little else will go well.
* Tune your ears to the frequency of respect and disrespect. Too many parents fail to recognize the sound of the disrespect in exchanges with their children because they focus too much on the content of what is said. It’s best to tune out the content at these times and listen for the child’s tone of voice.
* Nip disrespectful behavior in the bud. Train your reflexes to act quickly, responding immediately, if possible. Say to your child, That was disrespectful. Don’t walk away and fume about being talked to that way.
* Cultivate a special tone of voice that communicates, You are in dangerous territory; you would be wise to back off immediately.
* Explain your new policy on respect to your children at a quiet time. Many children are unaware that they are being disrespectful and/or have been allowed to get away with it for years. Children are happier when they’re consistently respectful to the most important adults in their lives.
* Use time outs for noncooperation when your child will not cease the disrespectful behavior. Do not allow a nasty conversation to proceed for long: it’s not good for you, your child, or the relationship. Declare yourself on the disrespectful behavior and abort the conversation rather than letting it escalate. Have a follow-up conversation later, when the storm has passed, listening to your child’s feelings - but insisting on respectful expression of anger in the future.
* Be firm but keep your cool. Confident parenting is most always calm, clear, focused, and assertive in times of conflict.
* Combine zero tolerance with a long-term view. A long-standing problem will not vanish overnight. Give your children time to change to a new, consistent way to behave.
* If the problem is chronic and the preceding strategies don’t seem to work, consider seeking family therapy to focus on your parenting skills. Don’t let the pattern go on for years.

Dr. Doherty’s list does not mention the “s” word (spanking). The Bible does. The Bible also teaches the difference between necessary corporeal punishment and abuse. However, if you are afraid you will warp your child’s personality with a spanking, you are being sinfully negligent as a parent.

I have known many parents who shied-away from disciplining their children. They assumed it was possible to always achieve their objective with reasoning. That may be so – but without firm discipline, your objectives will be far short of what
God’s best is for that child. He said that you are treating that child as illegitimate – an unwanted nuisance.

24He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. Proverbs 13:24 (KJV)
6For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. 7If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not? 8But if
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