The moment we come to know Christ, we are connected.
• We are members of God’s household.
• Verse 21: “…the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord.”
• Verse 22 “you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his Spirit.”
This connectedness is critical to the growth of the church.
• Our connectedness guarantees our survival.
• Growth takes place with this connection.
• In order words, we can only grow when we are in fellowship with one another.
This is what the church in Acts showed us.
• The first church – the early Christians DEVOTED themselves to fellowship.
• They just didn’t HAVE fellowship; they devoted themselves to it.
• Fellowship is a priority of the church, and one of the pillars for their growth.
This is the same terminology used by Paul here.
• The church will grow, when members are connected well with one another.
• Therefore fellowship in the body of Christ cannot be an option.
What comes to your mind when you hear of the word “fellowship”?
• What picture do you have? Usually it has to do with a place and time.
• The fellowship hall or room, or the place where we have a good chat and light refreshment.
Fellowship is first and foremost a relationship, rather than an activity.
• So when I say, “I am not going for fellowship today”, I am actually saying, “I am not making time for others.”
• It is more than ‘attending an activity’; it is building a relationship.
• Paul uses the words ‘building up’ here to describe this.
The Christians in Acts did it every day, in their homes. It’s a joy to be together.
• It’s a challenge for us today with our hectic schedule to even make time for our family, not to talk about church friends.
• But the Bible says (Heb 10:25) we are not to give up meeting together, all the more in the last days, because we need to stay encouraged.
FAILURE TO THRIVE SYNDROME
In Romania, and in many Eastern European countries, there are so many orphans being put into institutions that there isn’t enough food or medical supplies or staff members to take care of them.
The babies, often past toddler age, are still kept in diapers and placed in cribs because there’s no other way to take care of them.
They are lifted out to be fed and they infrequently have their diapers changed.
There is no real physical contact with other humans – no cuddling, no holding, hardly touched. They end up in semi-catatonic states (schizophrenia) and often die from a lack of human contact. This condition is called “failure to thrive syndrome.”
This “failure to thrive syndrome” can happen in our spiritual lives.
• But can be avoided and it can be cured.
• Meeting up with other believers in a church is critical for growth.
• Growth can only come in fellowship, and we need that.
• This is the support-system God ordained for our spiritual life, and our life.
There is this saying: “The family that eats together stays together.”
• It is so important to eat together! This is because as we sit around the table together we share not just food, but our lives – tell our joys, our pains, our struggles, we listen to each other, rejoice or cry with each other, and pray for each other.
But the Christian fellowship goes beyond this.
• It is only possible because of our common relationship with Christ.
• Christ is the chief cornerstone. We are becoming a dwelling in which God lives by His Spirit.
God is in the fellowship. True Christian fellowship can only take place IN CHRIST.
• In order words, it is not the same as the gathering we have at school or any other cliques. It is more than just being “a member” of a group.
• And it has nothing to do with organization, or ritual, or format or tradition.
Without this vertical relationship, frankly we cannot have fellowship.
• The Bible says in 2 Cor 6:14 “What fellowship can light have with darkness?”
• Fellowship with one another is therefore irreplaceable.
• No other groups or cliques outside can replace fellowship in the church.
• They are just different. We cannot grow without it.
Recently this word “fellowship” has been popularised by the popular movie based on the book “Lord of the Rings” (an adaptation of J. R. R. Tolkin’s trilogy).
In the first movie, entitled, Fellowship of the Ring, Tolkien describes the camaraderie of a diverse group of people who came together around a central purpose.
Called "the fellowship of the ring," their goal is to destroy the power of the Dark Lord that is somehow resident in his ring. The persons in this fellowship are different in many ways, yet they are united in their opposition of the Dark Lord.
That is the source of their fellowship.
It is the same with the church fellowship.
• It revolves around our common goal to build God’s Kingdom and oppose the destroyer of His Kingdom.
• The fellowship is strong when we spend time together doing the hard work of the Kingdom, and making a difference in the lives of the hurting people.
Fellowship is about the meeting of needs.
There once was a lady who began coming to church. She came for weeks all alone to the Sunday morning service. She would come in right as the service began and would be the first one to leave the church because she would rush out during the closing song.
One day she decided to stop going to church, after a few weeks the pastor went and visited the woman and she said she didn’t come back because she did not build any relationships in the church.
Many today are like this woman, they come into church and they leave before anyone can talk to them, and then they wonder why they have not built any relationships.
• It takes effort, brothers and sisters for us to build relationships.
• Even a 2-person relationship, like BF and GF, husband and wife, takes effort, not to mention the church.
Everyone loves good friendships.
• But if you want to build good friendships in the church then you need to get involved with things in the church.
• You cannot expect good relationships to be built if you are not fellowshipping with other Christians.
• If you lock yourself in the room and say, “Nobody cares for me!” Precisely, because you locked yourself out!
The early church was a close knit church. We saw that in Acts 2.
• Acts 2:44-45 “All the believers were together and had everything in common. Selling their possessions and goods, they gave to anyone as he had need.”
• I believe that the reason that the early church had such good relationships was because they are devoted to fellowship. They were close.
We often say that with Christ at the centre, marriages are stronger and friendships are stronger. Even for two people.
• As a church, we need to meet and share, with Christ in the fellowship.
• We see the result of good fellowship in the early church – the meeting of needs. They showed genuine care for each other and met each others’ needs.
• Fellowship is care in action.
So when I come to church for fellowship, I am not coming to attend an activity. I am coming to meet the needs of my fellow believers.
• And needless to say, you are there meeting my needs.
• We are both participating in the same act. You are either by giving what you have to the other person or receiving what he or she has.
• The help you give or receive may be physical, material, emotional or spiritual.
• God has created us to be dependent people—dependent on Him and on one another.
• You will probably not realise how much you really need fellowship, until you face a need yourself.
In the States, they have many worship services broadcasts on TV on Sundays. You don’t need to go to church. Someone said, if you are one of those who just stay at home and watch worship services broadcasts on the TV, or listening to the gospel via radio, you might want to step up to the television after a service and “give it a big hug.”
Without fellowship with others in a church, all you’ll get is a sense of emptiness.
• You will run out of spiritual fervour and passion in a short time, like a coal taken away from the burning heap.
• There are many lonely people around, despite the scores of TV channels we have.
• There is no substitute for interpersonal relationships, no substitute for going to church and worshipping with others of the same faith.
• We need fellowship to keep our faith glowing and growing.
In 1978 Jim Jones led a cult group to mass suicide at Jonestown in the Guyana jungle.
Mel White, a Christian writer/film-maker, set out to investigate the causes of the tragic mass suicide and published his finds in a book & film entitled, “Deceived”.
In talking to both defectors and survivors, he discovered to his surprise that “Jones’ victims were from our churches” (the title of the first chapter), but they did not find love there. A defector after 7 years said, “I was so turned off in every church I went to, because nobody cared.” Another said, “I went to church until I was 18 years old… and nobody ever befriended me.”
It was this discovery which led Mel White to list out 8 resolutions, in his last chapter entitled ‘It Must Not Happen Again’. The first is this: “I will do my best to help make my church a more loving community to our members, and the strangers in our midst.”
… John Stott, The Contemporary Christian, p.236-37.
This may not reflect the true picture today in many churches.
• It could well be a minority, but it serves as a reminder to us – the need for good, close fellowship among brothers and sisters in Christ, with a common passion for God and His Kingdom’s work, and genuine care and love for each other.
Stephen C. Neill wrote in Christian Faith Today (Pelican, 1955), p.174:
“Within the fellowship of those who are bound together by personal loyalty to Jesus Christ, the relationship of love reaches an intimacy and intensity unknown elsewhere. Friendship between the friends of Jesus of Nazareth is unlike any other friendship. This ought to be normal experience within the Christian community… That in existing Christian congregations it is so rare is a measure of the failure of the church as a whole to live up to the purpose of its Founder for it. Where it is experienced, especially across the barriers of race, nationality and language, it is one of the most convincing evidences of the continuing activity of Jesus among men.”
• It’s true that someone can become a Christian without a church, but no Christian can truly be one without a church.
• Without fellowship, the Christian (the “Lone Ranger” Christian) will develop “failure to thrive syndrome”.
Some practical suggestions that will enhance our ability to provide the fellowship relationships:
1. Learn the names of EVERY member or at least as many as you can. If you see a brother or sisters you don’t know… take the initiative to meet them and to know them.
2. Take notice of the cares and the joys of fellow Christians.
Listen to them; listen in order to help them. Often you won’t even need to say anything. You don’t have to fix all their problems - but you do have to care.
3. Be an active part in the life of the family.
4. Pray for those with special needs, mentioning them by name in your private prayers.
If fellowship is about being a family in Christ, then take your responsibility as a family member seriously.
