Summary: Many parents have kidded themselves into thinking they were teaching their children right when they told them what to do, but never did it themselves. The child picked up all the vibes that were coming through, and did just like the parents did.

Opening illustration: THE IDEA FOR CREATING A DAY for children to honor their fathers began in Spokane, Washington. A woman by the name of Sonora Smart Dodd thought of the idea for Father’s Day while listening to a Mother’s Day sermon in 1909. Having been raised by her father, after her mother died, Sonora wanted her father to know how special he was to her. It was her father that made all the parental sacrifices and was, in the eyes of his daughter, a courageous, selfless, and loving man. Her father was born in June, so she chose to hold the first Father’s Day celebration in Spokane, Washington on the 19th of June, 1910. In 1924 President Calvin Coolidge proclaimed the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day. Roses are the Father’s Day flowers: red to be worn for a living father and white if the father has died.

Introduction & Background: In this chapter the apostle, Paul (a) directs them how to account of him and his fellow-ministers, and therein, tacitly at least, reproves them for their unworthy carriage towards him (1Co_4:1-6). (b) He cautions them against pride and self-elation, and hints at the many temptations they had to conceive too highly of themselves, and despise him and other apostles, because of the great diversity in their circumstances and condition (1Co_4:7-13). (c) He challenges their regard to him as their father in Christ (1Co_4:14-16). (d) He tells them of his having sent Timothy to them, and of his own purpose to come to them shortly, however some among them had pleased themselves, and grown vain, upon the quite contrary expectation (1Co_4:17 to the end).

Kind of Dads God is looking out for:

1. Encouragers (v 14)

They do not contrast your pride and glorying with our humiliation to shame you, but as a fatherly admonition to beloved children. Fathers do not say these things in a harsh manner, with a severe spirit of rebuke; but in order to admonish you, to suggest counsel, to instill wisdom into the mind. I say these things not to make, you blush, but with the hope that they may be the means of your reformation, and of a more holy life. No man, no minister, ought to reprove another merely to overwhelm him with shame, but the object should always be to make a brother better; and the admonition should be so administered as to have this end, not sourly or morosely, but in a kind, tender, and affectionate manner. They being his children in a spiritual sense, for whom he had the strongest love and affection, as their spiritual Father; and as it was his place, and became him standing in such a relation to them, he warned, admonished, and put them in mind of their obligations and duty to him.

Illustration: For many years a country church in Iowa set aside one Sunday annually for youth to conduct the entire service. The young people did it all; call to worship, invocation, prayer, special music, announcements, choir, and one young person would deliver the sermon. One year a 16 year old boy was told that it was “his year.” He practiced for days until he could give the sermon with the help of just a few notes written on one side of a three by five index card. Sunday morning arrived. The other youths did their parts exceptionally well. When it was time, the young man walked to the pulpit- and his mind went blank. He looked at the index card, spoke for two minutes, and sat down. As the congregation sang the closing hymn, the young man thought, “I am never going to speak in public again, absolutely, positively not.” As the service ended the young man dashed for the exit, only to be stopped by a man named Dale Bockes. Mr. Bockes said, “Son that was a fine job.” And the lad said, “Fine job? Why I only went about two minutes.” “Yes,” said Mr. Bockes, “but you said it so well. It was so clear. You are a good speaker. I look forward to hearing you again.” And the next year, that young man spoke again. Now, John Kline, that young man, is a motivational speaker who speaks worldwide. Mr. Bockes was a great encourager.

2. Godly (v 15)

Here is where so many people get it all back to front. People say, “You talk about God being a ‘father’ - you should have met my dad. He was a user. He was a tyrant. He was a molester. Don’t talk to me about fathers - if God is a father then I don’t want to know Him!”

But listen, God is not just “LIKE a father”; He IS Father. THE Father. The Bible shows God to be the model of fatherhood upon which all other fathers are judged. If you want to know what a TRUE father is, don’t look at your earthly father, or my earthly father, or any other earthly father (however good they may appear to be). Open the pages of God’s Word and see the heart of the Father revealed in the nature of God. HE is the model. The One who is: Faithful, True, Just, Merciful, Compassionate, Slow to Anger, Loving, Affectionate, Providing, Patient, Kind, etc.

Though you may have or though you should have. It matters not how many you have, yet it is still true that I only sustain the relation to you of spiritual father, and whatever respect it is proper for you to have toward them, yet there is a special right which I have to admonish you, and a special deference which is due to me, from my early labors among you, and from the fact that you are my spiritual children. Greek: pedagogues; or those who conducted children to school, and who superintended their conduct out of school hours. Hence, those who had the care of children, or teachers (in general). It is then applied to instructors of any kind. In the Christian system or doctrine. The authority which Paul claims here, is that which a father has in preference to such an instructor. Spiritual fathers - that is, you have but one. You are to remember that however many teachers you have, yet that I alone am your spiritual father. By the aid and authority of Christ. I have begotten you by preaching his gospel and by his assistance. I was the instrument of your conversion. By means of the gospel; by preaching it to you, that is, by the truth.

- Setting the example

- Setting the tone

- Taking responsibility

Illustration: When you go through the fire you will develop godly character, patience, understanding how God works and knowing his timing, trust, confidence in God and his ability to keep you in any circumstance, a deeper relationship with God!!! You see, God is the God of Purpose and he intends to bring you through any circumstance....notice that I said bring you through "not take you out!!!" Lessons for growth can only be learned through experience!!!!

3. Imitators of Christ (v 16)

“imitate me” - copy my example; listen to my admonitions. Probably Paul had particularly in his eye their tendency to form parties; and here admonishes them that he had no disposition to form sects, and entreats them in this to imitate his example. A minister should always so live as that he can, without pride or ostentation, point to his own example; and entreat his people to imitate him. He should have such a confidence in his own integrity; he should lead such a blameless life; and “he should be assured that his people have so much evidence of his integrity,” that he can point them to his own example, and entreat them to live like himself. And to do this, he should live a life of piety, and should furnish such evidence of a pure conversation, that his people may have reason to regard him as a holy man.

Paul is recognizing the universal principle that people will always follow what you do, not what you say. You can talk your head off, but, if your life does not reflect what you say, they will not follow you. They will pay no attention to it, because coming through all the time is that non-verbal communication that is saying, "Yes, I am saying all this to you, but it is not really very important because I do not bother to do it myself." You have no right to talk if you do not do what you say. Many parents have kidded themselves into thinking they were teaching their children right when they told them what to do, but never did it themselves. The child picked up all the vibes that were coming through, and did just like the parents did.

Illustration: I was reading an article this week about some of the dangers that face our young people simply because they imitate what they see. The article told about the Reebok company pulling an ad which showed an athlete jumping over an oncoming car - because some teenagers in Kentucky were trying to do the computer-generated stunt for real. One of them broke his leg and ankle trying to perform the daredevil stunt. Other problems have arisen from teen imitators of stunts performed on an MTV show. The stuntman there tried, among other things, lying on a barbecue in a fire-resistant suit hung with steaks. A 13-year-old in Connecticut suffered second-degree burns when he tried to imitate the trick.

4. Mentors (spiritual dads) (v 17)

Paul in his epistles to Timothy, often styles him his son, his own son in the faith, his dearly beloved son; not that he was the instrument of his conversion, for he was a disciple of Christ before the apostle was acquainted with him; see Act_16:1 but either because of his age, he being younger than he; or because of his great affection for him; and chiefly because, as a son with a father, he served him in the Gospel, Phi_2:22 and since he was so familiar with him, and so much loved by him, it might reasonably be thought he full well knew his ways and methods of doctrine and practice.

- Personal discipleship (also need some godly “mothers” to take on spiritual daughters)

Illustration: Example of Bro. Ernest & Sis. Lalitha - our mentors. Were very patient with us. We would sometimes become impatient / anxious & they would yet be more patient - teaching us through their actions how to deal with people in ministry. Leave the entire ministry on our shoulders and go away for further studies etc. This helped us to work independently and teach others likewise.

Conclusion (Response):

a. (Dads) Commit to being a great father

b. (All the rest) Pray for fathers (and honor them!)

c. (Parents) Ask God’s forgiveness for regrets—but do what you can today. (May need to apologize to a child - then be the waiting father.)

d. (All) Receive your heavenly Father’s love.

I just want to tell you today - however life feels right now: FATHER LOVES YOU.