Summary: Father’s Day Message 2002 -- Four Characteristics for Fathers

BEING A VISIONARY FATHER IN A SHORT-SIGHTED WORLD

MATTHEW, CHAPTERS 1 AND 2

INTRODUCTION: According to the New Jersey Index of Leading Cultural Indicators, in 1960 the total number of births to teenagers was 11,636. In 2000, the number of births to teenagers was 8,219. A first glance would say we are doing something right, yet a little more scrutiny reveals a trend that is frightening. In 1960 8.8% or 2,003 of those births were to unmarried teens, with 9,633 births to teens that were married, compared with 89.4% or 7,350 births to unmarried teens in 2000, and only 869 births -- a mere 10.6% to teens married. During this same time period the divorce rate has gone from 115 per thousand marriages in 1960 to 508 per thousand marriages in 2000. A fatherless home today is 3 times more likely to be a home in poverty.

Education is not the answer – according to a recent article in the Burlington County times, New Jersey ranks 2nd in the nation, just behind New York, spending an average of over $ 10,000 per child, per year, yet domestic violence offenses have gone from just under 51,000 in 1990 to just under 78,000 in 2000, and cases of child abuse cases totaled 39,276 in 1999.

In his book "Life Without Father", David Pepenoe, Professor of Sociology at Rutgers University, says:

"The decline of fatherhood is one of the most unexpected and extraordinary social trends of our time. Nearly 50% of American children go to sleep each evening without being able to say goodnight to their dads."

"There was a time in the past when fatherlessness was more common than it is today, but death was to blame - not divorce, desertion or out of wedlock births. Most of today’s fatherless children have fathers who are perfectly capable of shouldering the responsibilities of fatherhood. Who would have ever thought so many of them would choose to relinquish those responsibilities?"

"A surprising suggestion emerging from recent social-science research is that it is decidedly worse for a child to lose a father in the modern, voluntary way than through death. The children of divorced and never married mothers are less successful by almost every measure than the children of widowed mothers. And there is reason to believe that having an unmarried father is even worse for a child than having a divorced father."

The absence of good fathers is detrimental to society itself. The absence of a good father hobbles the church as well. Father’s in particular, and men in general are the backbone of church leadership.

It is sad to say that our world has become increasingly myopic with regard to the importance of fathers, and it is about high time the church enters the debate, not with words, but with action. And men, today I want to challenge you in this area. So wives, pray for your husband beside you. Women, pray for the men in your lives and the men in this church. Buckle your seatbelt and prepare to embark ….

4 Characteristics Of A Visionary Father:

1. CHARACTERISTIC #1 – A VISIONARY FATHER CONSIDERS THE NEEDS OF HIS WIFE – MATT 1:20

Matthew 1:20 But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, "Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.

A. A GOOD FATHER WILL SHOW HIS CHILDREN THAT THEIR MOTHER IS IMPORTANT

Ephes. 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

1. What part of “love your wife” do you not understand?

2. Notice the type of love – in the same manner as Christ loved the church!

a. Christ did what is best for the church

b. Christ put the needs of the church beyond his own needs

c. Christ gave up his own rights for the rights of the church

d. Perhaps that is why the church is called “His bride”!

B. IMPORTANCE GOES BEYOND THE MATERIAL PROVISIONS

1. Joseph is a carpenter in occupied territory.

2. The material provision he provided were far less than many others could.

3. Material provisions for our family are important, but not to the extent we make them.

4. More important is the spiritual and emotional needs of our families.

I cannot tell you the number of times I have heard people speak of the depression, and then tell me they were poor, but did not know it! Their parents never harped on what they do did not have, but rather on what they did have!

C. JOSEPH CARED FOR HIS CHILDREN BY CARING FOR THEIR MOTHER BEFORE THEY WERE EVER BORN

1. It is easy to spend so much energy on your children that your marriage suffers

2. Children benefit from a strong marriage – how do you think they learn what a good marriage is?

A VISIONARY FATHER IS A GOOD SPOUSE – BECAUSE A GOOD SPOUSE IS A GOOD FATHER!

2. CHARACTERISTIC #2 – A VISIONARY FATHER PROVIDES FOR THE PROTECTION OF HIS CHILDREN – MATT 2:13

Matthew 2:13

When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. "Get up," he said, "take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt. Stay there until I tell you, for Herod is going to search for the child to kill him."

A. JOSEPH OBEYED GOD AND REMOVED HIS FAMILY FROM DANGER

B. FATHERS ARE PROTECTORS

1. Protection goes far beyond what we think

2. Protection starts with our presence

When Bo Jackson announced his retirement from baseball in 1994, it wasn’t the baseball strike ’ the deterioration of his athletic skills or a problem with his famous artificial hip that caused his premature departure from the game.

He left professional sports for good because of something his son Nicholas asked his mother Linda. Then six years old, Nicholas wondered why his father was never home. When he didn’t receive a satisfactory response, he asked her if his father had another family somewhere else. "If that isn’t enough for any man to make up his mind, then he isn’t a man", said Jackson. "And he isn’t a father." (Jim Johnson in Montgomery, Alabama Advertisor)

3. Protection continues with our mentoring

Park Rangers at a South African wildlife preserve were concerned about the slaughter of 39 rare white rhinos in the park. It turned out that the rhinos were not killed by poachers, but rather by juvenile delinquents – teen elephants!

About a decade before when the park could no longer sustain the increasing population of elephants, they decided to kill many of the adult elephants whose young were old enough to survive without them. So, the young elephants grew up fatherless.

As time went on these young elephants began to roam together in gangs and began to do other things that elephants don’t normally do. They threw sticks and water at the rhinos, and acted like neighborhood bullies. Without dominant males, the young bulls became sexually active, producing excessive testosterone, and exhibiting aggressive behavior. A few of the young males grew especially violent, knocking down rhinos and stepping or knelling on them, crushing the life out of them. Eventually the leader of this group had to be killed.

The park rangers theorized that these young teen-aged elephants were acting badly because they lacked role models. Their solution – bring in a large male to lead them and to counteract their behavior. Guess what – the new male established his dominance, and the killing stopped. The young males were mentored and saved!

a. Joseph took the child

a. Meaning – To associate with oneself closely

b. Joseph was a mentor to Jesus

A VISIONARY FATHER IS A GOOD PROTECTOR – BECAUSE A GOOD PROTECTOR IS A GOOD FATHER!

3. CHARACTERISTIC #3 – A VISIONARY FATHER PROVIDES FOR THE SPIRITUAL WELL-BEING OF HIS CHILDREN – MATT 2:19

Matthew 2:19 After Herod died, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt

A. JOSEPH RETURNS TO ISRAEL AFTER THE DEATH OF HEROD

B. EGYPT WAS A PLACE THAT DID NOT WORSHIP THE TRUE AND LIVING GOD

C. TODAY WE HAVE A WORLD THAT IS FAST BECOMING A PLACE THAT DOES NOT WORSHIP THE TRUE AND LIVING GOD.

1. God revealed will is being denied every day

2. The testimony of believers in the workplace is coming under attack

PAUL IN HIS LETTER TO THE EPHESIANS’ CHURCH OUTLINES WHAT A FATHER IS TO BE:

1. PAUL DOES NOT TELL FATHERS WHAT TO DO WITH THEIR KIDS, HE TELLS THEM TO BE IMITATORS OF GOD.

2. PAUL DOES NOT TELL FATHER TO FILL THE MINDS OF THEIR CHILDREN WITH THE BIBLE, HE TELLS THEM TO BE FILLED WITH THE HOLY SPIRIT.

3. PAUL DOES NOT TELL FATHERS TO IMPART WISDOM TO THEIR CHILDREN, BUT TO WALK WISELY, UNDERSTANDING THE WILL OF THE LORD.

4. PAUL DOES NOT TELL FATHERS TO DEMAND OBEDIENCE AND HONOR, BUT TO LOVE THEIR WIVES

A VISIONARY FATHER IS A SPIRITUAL PROVIDER – BECAUSE A GOOD PROVIDER IS A GOOD FATHER!

HAVE YOU NOTICED SOMETHING YET – GOD HAS GIVEN ALL OF THESE “VISIONS” TO JOSEPH. NOT BECAUSE GOD IS CHAUVINISTIC, RATHER BECAUSE GOD WANTS MEN DOING THIS KIND OF THING.

This really leads me to the final characteristic of a visionary father …

4. CHARACTERISTIC #4 -- A VISIONARY FATHER LIVES HIS LIFE IN THE CENTER OF GOD’S WILL – MATT 2:22

Matthew 2:22 But when he heard that Archelaus was reigning in Judea in place of his father Herod, he was afraid to go there. Having been warned in a dream, he withdrew to the district of Galilee,

A. JOSEPH FOLLOWED SPECIFIC INSTRUCTIONS FROM GOD EACH TIME THEY WERE GIVEN

B. JOSEPH’S OVERWHELMING DESIRE WAS TO BE IN THE CENTER OF GOD’S WILL

C. THE QUESTION REMAINS – WILL YOU BE A MAN OF VISION TODAY

D. FOR YOUR FAMILY’S SAKE – WILL YOU PUT GOD AT THE CENTER OF YOUR LIFE

1. Not only talking about the question of salvation

2. Also talking about the question of priority

A VISIONARY FATHER PUTS GOD AT THE CENTER OF HIS LIFE – BECAUSE A GOD CENTERED FATHER IS A GOOD FATHER!