Summary: Family roles are defined for Parents, Grandparents, extended family and church family

Family Roles

Family Series

1 The role of the Parents

a. Protector

Kings 1:5-6 (NIV) - Now Adonijah, whose mother was Haggith, put himself forward and said, "I will be king." So he got chariots and horses ready, with fifty men to run ahead of him. [6] (His father had never interfered with him by asking, "Why do you behave as you do?" He was also very handsome and was born next after Absalom.)

What kinds of things do you need to protect your children from? Themselves often.

i. Internet

1. The internet is a wonderful invention and the good by far outweighs the bad.

a. However there is a lot of bad and you must safeguard your children!

2. MySpace, Facebook

a. Keep a check on their sites

i. Know their passwords

b. Do not allow internet access outside of family room

c. Do not allow internet access on phones.

3. Learn how to check your history.

a. We can help you with that.

4. The internet is not evil but you must regulate it in your child’s life.

ii. video games

1. Make sure the games are appropriate for the age

2. watch the theme and hidden themes of the games

a. One popular game, Grand theft auto, has sexual abuse has an underlying theme.

3. www.whattheyplay.com

iii. movies & television

1. what is the overarching theme and message that the movies and TV show are portraying?

2. Learn to talk about movies and tv shows with your children.

iv. Music

1. What is the message of the song?

a. You don’t have to understand the lyrics, you can find them.

b. Allow them to listen to music they like within reason.

v. Friends

1. Who are they?

2. Where are they?

3. What is their faith?

b. Provider

i. Children need to know that they are going to be safe

ii. Children need to know that they are going to be provided for.

1. 1 Tim. 5:8 (NIV) - If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

a. Provide shelter and food, clothing and basic needs.

i. Clothes don’t have to be name brand

ii. Food doesn’t mean eating out

iii. Shelter needs to be clean and welcoming

b. Provide love and encouragement

i. Deut. 30:19 (NIV) - This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live

ii. Power of life and death…

iii. Fathers bond with your daughters or they will bond with other males.

c. Provide Spiritual Heritage

i. Proverbs 13:22 (NIV) A good man leaves an inheritance for his children’s children, but a sinner’s wealth is stored up for the righteous.

ii. 2 Tim. 1:5 (NIV) - I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also.

d. Provide Time

i. Illustration 205: No make-up = time with child

c. Professor (Teacher)

Proverbs 22:6 (NIV)

Train a child in the way he should go,

and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Deut. 11:18-21 (NIV)

Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. [19] Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. [20] Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, [21] so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the Lord swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.

i. Parents train in the morning, afternoon, walking, eating, etc.

1. Devotional training – priority

a. Daily devotional

i. Funny looking fishing lures

1. What lures you away from your devotionals?

2. Lifestyle training (imitate parents)

a. Matthew 18:6 (NIV) - But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.

b. Children do what you do, not what you say

i. You can’t pick the things they imitate.

3. Life experience training (of children)

a. Peter’s denial of Christ

i. Sin was pre warned about

ii. Punishment was delivered

1. Jesus was looking at Peter when the crow crowed.

2. Peter had to deal with hurting Jesus.

3. Jesus restored Peter.

iii. Don’t use discipline just to correct a bad behavior but to prevent a future one.

2 The role of the Family - Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, Siblings

a. Unifier / Support

Mark 3:25 (NIV) - If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.

i. Grandparents don’t plot with grandchildren…if mom says no ask grandmamma – rebellion

1. You would never want to teach your grandchildren witchcraft, yet if you assist in plots against parents, that is what you are doing.

a. Ill: Aunt Susan’s granddaughter eating sweets

2. Never tell a child their parents are wrong in their decisions.

3. Discuss your concerns with parents in private

ii. Parents listen to your parents

1. Proverbs 16:31 (NIV) - Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained by a righteous life.

a. They have wisdom that can help you.

iii. Siblings – realize the influence you have over each other

1. Don’t cover up each others sin

2. Be an example

3 The role of the Church - community of like faith

a. Support

i. Support Parents

b. Formal training / Informal Guidance

i. Teach

1. The things of God

2. Older women – teach younger women

a. Titus 2:4 (NLT) - These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children,

i. Context is to mentor younger girls

1. Angie Illustration

3. Older men – train younger men

a. 1 Tim. 5:1 (NIV) - Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers,

i. Context is to mentor younger men.

4. Do not allow anyone to confide in you.

ii. Parents make church a priority

1. Wrong signals

a. Homework is more important

b. Boyfriend / Girlfriend is more important

c. Rest is more important

d. Entertainment is more important

2. 6 hours a week of formal training will not cause rebellion. 8 hours of school every day and no rejects their education…

a. Without it, your kids may not survive.

Selected Bibliography

Special thanks and acknowledgement to Sermon Central and their contributors. Points and or illustrations may have been drawn from materials found on their website: www.sermoncentral.com.

A Treasury of Great Preaching. Austin, TX: WORDsearch Corp., 2005. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Brown, Francis, S.R. Driver, Charles A. Briggs. The Brown-Driver-Briggs Hebrew and English Lexicon. Boston: Houghton, Mifflin and Company, 1906. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Eims, LeRoy. Be the Leader You Were Meant to Be: Growing Into the Leader God Called You to Be. Colorado Springs, CO: Victor, 1996. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Gaebelein, Frank E. Expositor’s Bible Commentary. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 1976-1996.

Harris, R. Laird, Gleason L. Archer, Bruce K. Waltke, ed. Theological Wordbook of the Old Testament. Chicago: Moody Press, 1980. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Jamieson, Robert, A.R. Fausset, David Brown. A Commentary: Critical, Experimental, and Practical on the Old and New Testaments. Toledo, OH: Jerome B. Names & Co., 1884. WORDsearch CROSS e-book. Commentary contained as a single volume.

Life Application Study Bible. Wheaton, IL: Tyndale, 1988. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

McGee, J. Vernon. Thru The Bible with J. Vernon McGee. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 1983. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Meyer, F. B. Expository Preaching: Plans and Methods. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Peters, Ruth. Bible Illustrations – Illustrations of Bible Truths. Chattanooga, TN: AMG Publishers, 1998. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Tan, Paul Lee. Encyclopedia of 15,000 Illustrations: Signs of the Times. Dallas, TX: Bible Communications, 1998. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Thayer, J. H., trans. Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament New York: Harper & Brothers, 1889. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Thompson, Frank Charles. Thompson Chain Reference Bible. Indianapolis, IN: B. B. Kirkbride Bible Co., 1997. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.

Vine, William E. Vine’s Expository Dictionary of Old Testament and New Testament Words. Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 1940. WORDsearch CROSS e-book.