Introduction:
A. I spent some time looking for a good joke to begin today’s sermon, but I came up empty.
1. When I got to thinking about it, I realized that today’s subject is not very funny.
2. None of us like to hear the answer “NO.” That’s true of children, teenagers and adults.
B. I remember I hated to hear that answer when I was a child.
1. “Mom, can I have a candy bar?” “No, we are going to have dinner soon.” Rats!
2. “Dad, can I go out and play?” “No you can’t, it’s raining outside.” Rats!
3. “Mom and Dad, can I stay out all night running around with my friends getting into trouble?”
C. Thankfully, my parents said “No” to me a lot.
1. It takes a lot of love and courage for parents to say “no.”
2. Saying “yes” all the time is certainly not what is best for children.
3. Listen to these words from an article I read this week: “No is a word that children today do not seem to understand. Why is that? Because they rarely hear it. Apparently, parents have forgotten how to say no. Once upon a time no was a household word that was used quite often. I know I heard it plenty of times. But not anymore. Think about it. When was the last time you told your kids no and meant it and then stuck with it? Saying yes has spiraled out of control and it’s time to put a stop to it.
Psychologists, parents and educators are realizing that it’s time to stop looking the other way and start teaching kids that life does not revolve around them. Kids have become demanding, rude and spoiled. There is no longer any respect for adults or authority of any kind. They lack compassion for others and they do not know the value of any kind of work, much less hard work. There is only a sense of entitlement. Kids are out of control.” (Parents to Kids: I Said "No" and That’s My Final Answer!, by Judy Wilson)
4. Another article said: “No is a way in which we set limits on behavior. Whether we like it or not, there are limits. Society sets limits. Families set limits. Parents set limits. Employers set limits. Our spouses set limits. There are all sorts of ways in which we live and function in a world where there are limits.
We prepare children for life when we create a world, which reflects the limits of reality.
How did we go wrong here? We can go wrong when we allow our two year old to pound away at our legs, and chuckle as he does so, thinking that he’ll learn to lighten up later on. This does not reflect reality. Reality is that we can’t hit away at someone else. The sooner kids learn no for such actions….the easier life will be.
When your daughter asks for a limousine to take six of her best friends to the mall to go shopping for her birthday, you must say no. Perhaps you can afford it. That not the point.
The point is that you want to prepare your kids for reality. For most of us, reality is not that we have a limousine taking us out to dinner every time we have a birthday. The reality is also that there are limits on spending, and that your child needs to learn that their request is not your command.” (Learning How to Say No, by Dr. Randy Cale)
5. There are not many pictures sadder to me than that of a parent who can’t say “no” to their child - A child who is obviously in control of his or her parent.
D. God, our Heavenly Father is a perfect parent and that’s why there are times when God says “no.”
1. As God’s children, we probably don’t like it when God says “no” any more than when we were kids and our earthly parents said “no.”
2. But it is so important that we learn to trust God and thank Him when He says “yes” and when He says “no.”
3. In today’s story from 2 Samuel 7 we are going to witness how God said “no” to David and how David responded to God’s answer.
4. There is an important lessons for us to learn from David’s example.
I. The Story
A. As our story begins we see that things have finally come together for David.
1. The Bible says: After the king was settled in his palace and the LORD had given him rest from all his enemies around him…(2 Sam. 7:1)
2. After the years of danger and struggle and waiting, David is finally settled in his palace and the Lord has given him rest from all his enemies.
3. Things are finally good and as David takes a breath and puts his feet up for a minute, he considers what his next mission or project should be.
4. It doesn’t take him long to realize what the obvious next thing should be – he has brought the ark of God to Jerusalem and now he should build a permanent place to house it.
5. David has established his place in Jerusalem and now he intends to establish God’s place.
B. The Bible says: He said to Nathan the prophet, “Here I am, living in a palace of cedar, while the ark of God remains in a tent.” Nathan replied to the king, “Whatever you have in mind, go ahead and do it, for the LORD is with you.” (2 Sam. 7:2-3)
1. So David announces his building plans to Nathan the prophet, who is mentioned here for the first time.
2. Nathan has become David’s advisor and confidant.
3. Nathan responds immediately with his approval and blessing.
4. That’s what good friends do, right? Good friends should support and encourage each other’s dreams.
5. The interesting thing here is that it seems that neither David nor Nathan thought to ask God what He thought about the proposal.
6. But both of them must have thought, “Why would God be against such a good idea?”
7. What could be more appropriate at this point in Israel’s history and David’s life for bringing glory to God, than to build God a temple, right?
8. And so at that moment, in the minds of David and Nathan, the sanctuary is as good as built, but God thought differently.
C. The Bible says: That night the word of the LORD came to Nathan, saying: “Go and tell my servant David, ‘This is what the LORD says: Are you the one to build me a house to dwell in?’ ” (2 Sam. 7:4-5)
1. In a parallel passage in 1 Chronicles 17, God’s answer is put more directly: That night the word of God came to Nathan, saying: “Go and tell my servant David, ‘This is what the LORD says: You are not the one to build me a house to dwell in.’ ” (1 Chron. 17:3-4)
2. What a hard answer that was to have to take to the king, especially after Nathan had already given David the green light.
3. Building a temple for the Lord was a great idea, a great plan, but it wasn’t God’s plan.
D. Along with the refusal, God offered David an affirmation.
1. The Bible says: “Now then, tell my servant David, ‘This is what the LORD Almighty says: I took you from the pasture and from following the flock to be ruler over my people Israel. I have been with you wherever you have gone, and I have cut off all your enemies from before you. Now I will make your name great, like the names of the greatest men of the earth. And I will provide a place for my people Israel and will plant them so that they can have a home of their own and no longer be disturbed.” (2 Sam. 7:8-10)
2. So it’s clear, God had appointed David to be a king, and God gifted him and chose him to lead God’s people, but God has not appointed him to build a temple.
3. And God intends to make his name great and to give his people a place of peace and safety.
4. Isn’t all that wonderful? Ultimately, isn’t that enough? Certainly, but hold on, there is more.
E. The message for David continues: “The LORD declares to you that the LORD himself will establish a house for you: When your days are over and you rest with your fathers, I will raise up your offspring to succeed you, who will come from your own body, and I will establish his kingdom. He is the one who will build a house for my Name, and I will establish the throne of his kingdom forever.” (2 Sam. 7:11b-13)
1. David is given a glorious peak into the future.
2. David will have a son and that son will be the one to build the temple for the Lord.
3. And not only that, but God will establish the throne of his kingdom forever – Jesus is the descendent of David who is now sitting on His eternal throne.
4. Isn’t that something – David wanted to build God a house, but ultimately God says that he is going to build a house for David, which will be an enduring dynasty.
F. Why is it that God said “no” to David’s desire?
1. Was it because David’s desire was wrong? Were his motives wrong?
2. No it appears that David’s heart was right, and Scripture commends him for having this desire in his heart.
3. 2 Chronicles 6 says: “My father David had it in his heart to build a temple for the Name of the LORD, the God of Israel. But the LORD said to my father David, ‘Because it was in your heart to build a temple for my Name, you did well to have this in your heart. Nevertheless, you are not the one to build the temple, but your son, who is your own flesh and blood—he is the one who will build the temple for my Name.’ ” (2 Chron. 6:7-9)
4. So rather than seeing David’s desire as something wrong, God commended him for his desire.
5. In 1 Chronicles 22:7-8, God explains why David can’t build Him a temple: David said to Solomon: “My son, I had it in my heart to build a house for the Name of the Lord my God. But the word of the Lord came to me: ‘You have shed much blood and have fought many wars. You are not to build a house for my Name, because you have shed much blood on the earth in my sight.’ ”
6. David had been a warrior and had taken many a life, and for that reason God did not want David to build the temple.
7. God has His reasons for His reasons, and it was not David’s place, nor ours to question God’s decision.
G. So how did David respond to the news that he would not be allowed to build the temple?
1. I love what the Bible says David did: Then King David went in and sat before the LORD…(2 Sam. 7:18)
2. Isn’t that interesting? David went in and sat down with the Lord.
3. We don’t know exactly where he went to sit with the Lord – maybe he went to the Tabernacle, maybe he went into his bedroom or his study.
4. He had just heard God tell him, “The answer is ‘no’. You’re not going to execute that dream.”
5. As David sat down and looked up to the Lord, it was like David was taking himself out of the driver seat and letting God the King take the wheel.
6. For the Scripture Reading today, I had us read Psalm 93 because that Psalm portrays God how He really is – He is the Lord our King, robed in majesty, girded with strength – He is in charge.
7. That is a lesson that all of us need to learn and keep learning – God is the Boss and He knows best.
H. As David sat there before the Lord, he began to pray and his prayer shows that he had been listening very carefully to God’s message that had been delivered by Nathan.
1. David begins his prayer, saying: “Who am I, O Sovereign LORD, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? And as if this were not enough in your sight, O Sovereign LORD, you have also spoken about the future of the house of your servant. Is this your usual way of dealing with man, O Sovereign LORD What more can David say to you? For you know your servant, O Sovereign LORD. For the sake of your word and according to your will, you have done this great thing and made it known to your servant.” (2 Sam. 7:18-21)
2. Isn’t it wonderful how David acted like a little child here?
3. When a child refers to himself, he often calls himself by name – “Daddy, can Johnny ride his big-wheel a little bit longer before he comes in for supper?” “Can Johnny have a piece of candy?”
4. So just like a little boy, David sat down before the Lord and said, in effect, “Dad, what is David that You’ve blessed his house and his life and have brought him from leading a little flock of sheep to giving him this magnificent throne? Who am I?”
5. I think it is important that every once in a while we sit down, take a long look at our short lives, and just count our blessings.
a. Who are we to have been protected from the disasters that have hit so many others?
b. Who are we that we have a house to keep us warm in the winter and cool in the summer when so many don’t have homes?
c. Who am I, Lord, that You should give me health and strength to be able to hold a job or pursue a career or get a degree?
d. Who am I, Lord to have parents who loved and encouraged me?
e. Who am I to have been blessed with such a great spouse?
f. Who am I, Lord to have these kids and to see them grow? Who am I?
6. “Dream or no dream,” says king David, “I’m a blessed person.” And so are we. Amen!
7. More evidence that he is indeed a man after God’s own heart!
I. Look at some more of what David prayed: “How great you are, O Sovereign LORD! There is no one like you, and there is no God but you, as we have heard with our own ears. And who is like your people Israel—the one nation on earth that God went out to redeem as a people for himself, and to make a name for himself, and to perform great and awesome wonders by driving out nations and their gods from before your people, whom you redeemed from Egypt? You have established your people Israel as your very own forever, and you, O LORD, have become their God.
And now, LORD God, keep forever the promise you have made concerning your servant and his house. Do as you promised, so that your name will be great forever. Then men will say, ‘The LORD Almighty is God over Israel!’ And the house of your servant David will be established before you.
O LORD Almighty, God of Israel, you have revealed this to your servant, saying, ‘I will build a house for you.’ So your servant has found courage to offer you this prayer. O Sovereign LORD, you are God! Your words are trustworthy, and you have promised these good things to your servant. Now be pleased to bless the house of your servant, that it may continue forever in your sight; for you, O Sovereign LORD, have spoken, and with your blessing the house of your servant will be blessed forever.” (2 Sam. 7:22-29)
1. What a grateful man was David.
2. When God said “no,” he didn’t throw a temper tantrum, he just stepped back and thanked the Lord for being the God He was and is, and thanked Him for doing the things He had done, and for doing the things He was going to do.
J. But that’s not all David did, the Bible says: So David gave orders to assemble the aliens living in Israel, and from among them he appointed stonecutters to prepare dressed stone for building the house of God. He provided a large amount of iron to make nails for the doors of the gateways and for the fittings, and more bronze than could be weighed. He also provided more cedar logs than could be counted, for the Sidonians and Tyrians had brought large numbers of them to David.
David said, “My son Solomon is young and inexperienced, and the house to be built for the LORD should be of great magnificence and fame and splendor in the sight of all the nations. Therefore I will make preparations for it.” So David made extensive preparations before his death. (1 Chron. 22:2-5)
1. David may have been a weak father at other times, but at this moment, he stood strong and tall.
2. David knew that God had said “no” to him, but “yes” to Solomon, so David was bound and determined to do all he could to help his son complete the task.
3. Do we throw our support behind the one who gets the position and privilege that we wanted?
4. That is a very hard thing to do – another piece of evidence why David was a man after God’s own heart.
II. The Application
A. So what lessons would God have us learn from today’s story? Again, there are many lessons we could learn, but let us focus on just one.
B. First and foremost, we must learn the lesson that God is Supreme – He is the Lord.
1. And as the Sovereign Lord, God knows what is best and does what is best.
2. Our job is to trust and obey. Our job is to humbly submit ourselves to God and cooperate with Him.
3. When God says “no” to our prayers and our dreams, we must trust that He has a better plan and we must patiently support it.
4. Please understand that I’m not saying that any of this is easy.
a. Perhaps you prayed that your loved one would be healed but they weren’t.
b. Perhaps you have been praying for a job, but you are still unemployed.
c. Perhaps you have been praying for a believing spouse, but you are still spiritually single or otherwise single.
d. Perhaps you have been praying for children, but your quiver remains empty.
e. Perhaps you have been praying that some situation would work out, but it just hasn’t.
f. Perhaps you have great dreams, but they just don’t materialize.
5. God does answer all prayers; He answers “yes”, “no” or “wait.”
6. If you are like me, then you are most fond of “yes”, less fond of “wait”, and you find the “no” answer to be the hardest of all.
C. One of the scarier times of my life occurred as I was graduating from Harding with my Bachelor’s Degree.
1. It was May of 1984 and Diana and I had been married about 5 months.
2. I had applied to numerous ministry openings, including one at the Wetzel Road Church of Christ, and several around Memphis, TN where Harding Graduate School of Religion is.
3. Bill Perkins had written me a very kind “thanks, but no thanks” letter as had all the other churches to which I had applied.
4. We had no money and no where to go and I was graduating in a matter of days – I was thinking, “God, what are you doing? Why are you doing this to us?”
5. To make a long story short, God had said “no” to all those other directions because He wanted us at a wonderful church in a small town in south, central Arkansas – the last place in the world I wanted to be.
6. But it proved to be just where we needed to be and we enjoyed a wonderful three and ½ years of ministry there – we continue to have several significant relationships with members of that congregation that have been such a blessing to us.
7. The second time I applied to a position here at Wetzel Road, the answer was “yes” because it was the right time.
D. When God says “no” it could be for a number of reasons.
1. He might say “no” because the idea is not right.
2. He might say “no” because the timing is not right.
3. He might say “no” because we are not right.
E. Part of the process of maturing in our faith is the ability to trust and thank God regardless of His answers.
1. Allow me to end with a poem by Ruth Harms Calkin, titled Thank You for Saying No.
Lord, day after day I’ve thanked You for saying yes.
But when have I genuinely thanked You for saying no?
Yet I shudder to think of the possible smears
The cumulative blots on my life had you not been sufficiently wise
To say an unalterable no.
So thank you for saying no when my want list for things
Far exceeded my longing for you.
When I asked for a stone
Foolishly certain I asked for bread
Thank you for saying no.
To my petulant “Just this time, Lord?”
Thank you for saying no
To senseless excuses, selfish motives, dangerous diversions.
Thank you for saying no
When temptation that enticed me
Would have bound me beyond escape.
Thank you for saying no
When I asked you to leave me alone.
Above all
Thank you for saying no
When in anguish I asked
“If I give You all else may I keep this?”
Lord, my awe increases
When I see the wisdom
Of Your divine no.
F. Let us learn to be like David who when God said “no” gave thanks to the Lord anyhow.
