UNFORGIVEN
A STUDY OVER THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT: PART XX (TOPIC: Failure to Forgive)
INTRO: Unforgiven was a 1992 western movie starring none other than Clint Eastwood as a retired gunslinger who desires one more shooting, since he is bored with his life as a farmer. After deciding to do the hit (the guy to be killed did a horrible deed supposedly deserving of death), Eastwood’s character seems to have no guilt. And even rides off in the sunset at the end promising death to anyone else who challenges, I think even promising to kill their dog.
TRANSITION: The movie got great reviews, to some it was the last great western. Eastwood’s character is amusing, even one time stating after he had killed an unarmed man, “he should have armed himself, if he’s going to decorate the saloon with my friend.” But in all reality, is it okay to be that unforgiven. I know it is a character, but to go that many years, secretly wishing violence for the sake of pleasure, even if the violence is justified. Is that okay?
BIBLE VERSE: Matthew 6:14-15
6:14 “For if you forgive others their sins, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 6:15 But if you do not forgive others, your Father will not forgive you your sins.
TRANSITION: Jesus just got done teaching people how to prayer, but then he goes back to explain one small detail, and ONLY one detail. He doesn’t explain “Our Father.” He doesn’t explain “Your Will Be Done.” He explains forgiveness, and then makes an amazing statement, one in which it appears He is saying that He will NOT forgive us at times. So let’s take a look.
1. FORGIVENESS IS A MUST
VOODOO CARD AT COMPUTER STORE: This week, I went into a computer story some distance from here, and was helped my a nice guy in picking up a computer monitor. I couldn’t help but notice a note on his wall. It had a voodoo doll, some needles, and something like an ex-girlfriend. It read something to the like of “if your relationship wasn’t great, your ex can still be magical.” It implied that not it is over, get a voodoo doll and put some curses into that person (I did ask him about it, it was a joke and given to him by his ex-girlfriend).
BIBLE VERSE: Proverbs 24:29
24:29 Do not say, “I will do to him just as he has done to me; I will pay him back according to what he has done.”
In other words, retaliation is not a practical answer. It is like saying, “do not do to others what you would have them do unto you.”
GOD’S PAYBACK: When it comes to payback, please forgive others, and let God take care of the situation. Time and time again, when we read the Bible, we see a similar format for God’s justice.
A. The Righteous Grow Impatient
B. The Righteous Question God’s Judgment
C. The Wicked Grow Increasingly Arrogant
D. God Judges
Take a look at the verses here, remember verse 8 is when God judges.
BIBLE VERSE: Psalms 94:1-7
94:1 O LORD, the God who avenges!
O God who avenges, reveal your splendor!
94:2 Rise up, O judge of the earth!
Pay back the proud!
94:3 O LORD, how long will the wicked,
how long will the wicked celebrate?
94:4 They spew out threats and speak defiantly;
all the evildoers boast.
94:5 O LORD, they crush your people;
they oppress the nation that belongs to you.
94:6 They kill the widow and the one residing outside his native land,
and they murder the fatherless.
94:7 Then they say, “The LORD does not see this;
the God of Jacob does not take notice of it.”
PERSONAL STORY: COLLEGE FOOTBALL
When I was in college, we were playing a football team that we just killed, this was my first year. But, the year before they had beaten us, and I really found that hard to believe since we supposedly had pretty much the same team. So I asked some guys, and they had all different explanations for the reasons.
But then I talked with a Christian named Roy (nicknamed Homey). He explained that right before the team prayer, the Defensive Line coach looked at the team and said aloud, “why do we need to pray, we don’t need prayer to beat this team.”
To this day, Roy thinks we lost the game because that coach “became increasingly arrogant.”
2. FORGIVENESS IS A DECISION
EXAMPLE: ANSWERING THE TELEPHONE This is a small point, but a big point. Two people are yelling, having a knock down all out heated argument. Then the phone rings, and all of the sudden a very lovingly voice with deep sympathies answers “hello, how may I help you.” Why is that? Because our anger, our decisions, to much of the degree is a conscience decision, and they CAN be controlled. So can forgiveness.
I JUST CAN’T FIND IT IN MY HEART TO FORGIVE THEM: (Speak with great compassion here, cause this can come across mean if not explained correctly and from the heart) I know some of you have had some awful awful stuff happen to you. You will never hear me ask you to forget it. Never. But, you will hear me say that your lack of forgiveness is messing YOU up—not them. And it really is a decision.
EXPLANATION OF THE BACKSTAB (TO MANY, PERHAPS THE WORST ATTACK):
For this, let’s take a look at David & how he handled the backstab.
A. As a reward for killing Goliath, he was supposed to be given the hand of his daughter—but then he gave him a military requirement to do first, and when the requirement was done, Saul gave his daughter to another man anyway.
B. David was sent to be the leader over 1000 men, perhaps as a demotion—only to have David killed off in a war.
C. David was playing the harp to soothe his King Saul—and he literally was pinned up against the wall by his spear.
D. Later, David had to hid in a cave—because Saul had his army hunting him.
BIBLE VERSE: 1 Samuel 18:6-8
18:6 When the men arrived after David returned from striking down the Philistine, the women from all the cities of Israel came out singing and dancing to meet King Saul. They were happy as they played their tambourines and three-stringed instruments. 18:7 The women who were playing the music sang,
“Saul has struck down his thousands, but David his tens of thousands!” 18:8 This made Saul very angry.
WHY THE BACKSTAB? BECAUSE OF JEALOUSY. And the jealousy led to anger, which led to the backlash. So if you are being backstabbed, now you know why.
BUT…WILL YOU FORGIVE THEM?
3. UNFORGIVENESS LEAVES US IN BONDAGE
BIBLE VERSE: Matthew 18:23-35
18:23 “For this reason, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his slaves. 18:24 As he began settling his accounts, a man who owed ten thousand talents was brought to him. 18:25 Because he was not able to repay it, the lord ordered him to be sold, along with his wife, children, and whatever he possessed, and repayment to be made. 18:26 Then the slave threw himself to the ground before him, saying, ‘Be patient with me, and I will repay you everything.’ 18:27 The lord had compassion on that slave and released him, and forgave him the debt. 18:28 After he went out, that same slave found one of his fellow slaves who owed him one hundred silver coins. So he grabbed him by the throat and started to choke him, saying, ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ 18:29 Then his fellow slave threw himself down and begged him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will repay you.’ 18:30 But he refused. Instead, he went out and threw him in prison until he repaid the debt. 18:31 When his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were very upset and went and told their lord everything that had taken place. 18:32 Then his lord called the first slave and said to him, ‘Evil slave! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me! 18:33 Should you not have shown mercy to your fellow slave, just as I showed it to you?’ 18:34 And in anger his lord turned him over to the prison guards to torture him until he repaid all he owed. 18:35 So also my heavenly Father will do to you, if each of you does not forgive your brother from your heart.”
What Happened to the Unforgiven Slave? He ended up in prison—forever. Why? Because he would NOT forgive when he had been forgiven. It is unbelievable really.
BONDAGE: Slavery or involuntary servitude, serfdom, the state of being bound by or subjected to some external power or control, the state of practice of being physically restrained, as by being tied up, chained, or put in handcuffs.
This is what we do to ourselves if we do NOT forgive. We put our own spiritual walk in chains.
Here is the kind of forgiveness we need to possess (read the parts of the story that need to be read):
EXTREME FORGIVENESS STORY: CHRIS CARRIER
“It was five days before Christmas when a stranger approached ten-year-old Christopher Carrier, claiming to be a friend of his father. "I want to buy him a gift, and I need your help," said the stranger. Eager to do something good for his dad, Chris climbed aboard a motor home parked up the street.
The driver took Chris to a remote field, claiming to be lost, and asked Chris to look at a map. Suddenly Chris felt a sharp pain in his back. The stranger had stabbed him with an ice pick. The man drove the wounded boy down a dirt road, shot him in the left temple, and left him for dead in the alligator-infested Florida Everglades.
Chris lay lifeless for six days until a driver found him. Chris miraculously survived his injuries, though he was blind in his left eye. Because he was unable to identify his attacker, police could not make an arrest. For a long time young Chris remained frightened, despite police protection. Finally at an invitation given after a church hayride, Chris trusted Jesus Christ as his Saviour. He recalls, "I was overwhelmed with emotion…because I knew I had never really accepted and personally met the Saviour." This turning point in Chris’s life came three years after the attack. At age 15, Chris shared his story for the first time. He eventually decided to pursue full-time ministry, helping others find the peace he had discovered in Christ.
In 1996 a detective told Chris over the phone that a man had confessed to the crime that had cost him his left eye. The man’s name was David McAllister. Chris made plans to visit the feeble and now blind man, living in a nursing home. The strong young man Chris remembered was now a broken, humbled 77-year-old.
Chris learned from the detective some of the background of what had happened years ago. McAllister had been hired by Chris’s father to work as a nurse for an ailing uncle. Chris’s dad had caught McAllister drinking on the job and had fired him. The senseless attack on Chris had been motivated by revenge.
As Chris now talked to the old man, at first McAllister denied knowing anything about the kidnapping. As Chris revealed more about himself, the old man softened and eventually apologized. Chris said, “I told him, ‘What you meant for evil, God has turned into a wonderful blessing.’” Chris told his attacker how God had allowed his wounds to become open doors to share the good news of Christ.
Chris went home and told his wife and kids about meeting the man who had tried to kill him. The entire family began almost daily visits to McAllister’s nursing home. During one Sunday afternoon visit, Chris popped the most important question he had yet asked McAllister: "Do you want to know the Lord?" McAllister said yes. Both men basked in forgiveness as McAllister gave his heart to Christ. A few days later McAllister died—peacefully—in his sleep.
Carrier says it is not a story of regret, but of redemption. “I saw the Lord give that man back his life, and so much more,” Chris said. “I can’t wait to see him again someday—in heaven.”
Sources:
Apple, Paul. The God of Paybacks. Hope Bible Church, Indiana. January 2001.
Ashcraft, Bob. Forgiveness. Fellowship of Praise, Indiana. July 2001.
Decker, Paul. The Lines of Communication Are Open. Randal Memorial Baptist Church, April 24, 2002.
Huffman, Ewen. Prayer 5A Forgiveness. Winchester Baptist Church, February 2003.
Stoll, Matthew. What To Do When You’ve Been Stabbed In the Back. Epsilon United Methodist Church, Michigan. June 2006.
Wikipedia.org. Key word: bondage.
UNFORGIVEN
A STUDY OVER THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT: PART XX (TOPIC: Failure to Forgive)
Unforgiven the Movie: _____________________________________________________________
BIBLE VERSE: Matthew 6:14-15
6:14 “For if you forgive others their sins, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 6:15 But if you do ___________________________t forgive others, your Father will ____________ forgive you your sins.
1. FORGIVENESS IS A ________________________
Voodoo Card at Computer Store:
BIBLE VERSE: Proverbs 24:29
24:29 Do not say, “I will do to him just as he has done to me; I will _____________ him ______________ according to what he has done.”
God’s Payback:
A. _____________________________________________________
B. _____________________________________________________
C. _____________________________________________________
D. _____________________________________________________
BIBLE VERSE: Psalms 94:1-7
2. FORGIVENESS IS A _______________________________________
The Telephone: ______________________________________________________________
The Heart: ______________________________________________________________
The Backstab: ______________________________________________________________
David’s Problems with Saul:
A. ____________________________________________________
B. ____________________________________________________
C. ____________________________________________________
D. ____________________________________________________
Why Backstab? ________________________________________
3. UNFORGIVENESS LEAVES US ____________________________________
BIBLE VERSE: Matthew 18:23-35
What Happened in Unforgiven Slave? _____________________________________________
Key Word: ____________________________
Forgiveness Example: Chris Carrier