LEARNING TO LEAN
Retreat Session 1
This weekend I would like to ask the question “What makes a good man.” Let me suggest to you over the next few days 3 characteristics of a good man. These are 3 things that will help you be a better husband and father. They are learning how to LEAN, learning how to LEAD and learning how to LOVE. Tonight we are talking about learning to lean.
Two hunters got a pilot to fly them into the far north for deer hunting. They were quite successful in their venture and bagged six big bucks. The pilot came back, as arranged, to pick them up. They started loading their gear into the plane, including the six deer. But the pilot objected and he said, "The plane can only take four of your deer; you will have to leave two behind." They argued with him; the year before they had shot six and the pilot had allowed them to put all aboard. The plane was the same model and capacity. Reluctantly, the pilot finally permitted them to put all six aboard. But when the attempted to take off and leave the valley, the little plane could not make it and they crashed into the wilderness. Climbing out of the wreckage, one hunter said to the other, "Do you know where we are?" "I think so," replied the other hunter. "This is just about the same place where we crashed last year."
As a man I recognize that there are times in my life where I have had a hard time learning from my mistakes. Too often as men we are rely on our own strength and our self dependence gets us in trouble. Many men have a hard time admitting that they need help. Are you good at asking for directions? Men often try to be “in control”…to “make things happen.” Often ladies find it easier to “rest in the Lord” and lean on Him for salvation. It’s a part of a woman’s nature to place themselves in someone else’s hands. It’s not that way for men.
The secure man’s 23rd Psalm says… I am my provider, I shall not be in want. I have stored up hay if the grass is not green in the valley. I have a big canteen just in case the waters are dried up. I have a map so I can find the right path. Even if I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I have no fear… I have life insurance. I will fear no evil because I have theft alarms on my car and home and the police will be there in minutes. My accountant and my broker, they comfort me. I have prepared an investment portfolio that will put food on the table for years to come. I have been anointed with ability and good planning. Surely, income and dividends will follow me every month, without fail. And I will dwell in my own home all the days of my life.
Prov 3:5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
So how do you learn how to lean? What does it mean to lean on the Lord?
On September 10 1945 Lloyd Olsen, a farmer in Fruita Colorado, headed out to the barn to get a chicken ready for dinner. Wanting to preserve as much of the neck as possible for his Mother-in-law who was joining them for dinner, he swung his axe at the base of the skull. Rather than die the chicken lived and became a bizarre piece of history. Olsen not only didn’t eat the bird, he actually started to care for it. ’Mike’ would go through the motions of pecking for food but couldn’t get anything. When he tried to crow, only a gurgle came out. The farmer fed this strange chicken with an eyedropper, and after a week of survival, he took Mike to some scientists at the University of Utah. They theorized the chicken had enough brain stem to live without his head.
For another 18 months the chicken lived and grew from a mere 2 1/2 lbs. to nearly 8 lbs. Seeing that there was money to be made Lloyd Olsen took Mike the Headless Chicken on a national tour. Curious sideshow patrons in New York, Atlantic City, Los Angeles, and San Diego lined up to pay 25 cents to see him. Mike the "Wonder Chicken" was valued at $10,000.00. Mike made it into Life magazine and the Guinness Book of World Records. One night he choked to death on a kernel of corn in an Arizona motel - eighteen months after surviving the chopping block. In March of 2000, a sculpture of Mike the Headless Chicken was unveiled in Fruita. Every year a festival is held to celebrate Mike’s will to live. I know you think I made this up but you can check it out at www.miketheheadlesschicken.org.
Mike the headless chicken might describe how many of us fell. We move through the motions of life without the Head of Christ to guide us. We may have movement and life, but not much direction. In the bible there is the story of a king who learned this principle:
2 Kings 13:14 Now Elisha was suffering from the illness from which he died. Jehoash king of Israel went down to see him and wept over him. "My father! My father!" he cried. "The chariots and horsemen of Israel!" 15 Elisha said, "Get a bow and some arrows," and he did so. 16 "Take the bow in your hands," he said to the king of Israel. When he had taken it, Elisha put his hands on the king’s hands. 17 "Open the east window," he said, and he opened it. "Shoot!" Elisha said, and he shot. "The LORD’s arrow of victory, the arrow of victory over Aram!" Elisha declared. "You will completely destroy the Arameans at Aphek." 18 Then he said, "Take the arrows," and the king took them. Elisha told him, "Strike the ground." He struck it three times and stopped. 19 The man of God was angry with him and said, "You should have struck the ground five or six times; then you would have defeated Aram and completely destroyed it. But now you will defeat it only three times."
After Elijah confronted the prophets of Baal on Mount Carmal he ran for his life and found himself in Horeb alone and exhausted. In the midst of Elijah’s depression God said that 3 things would occur – that Elijah would get an assistant in the form of Elisha, that Israel’s king Ahab (a very bad king) would be completely destroyed by Jehu his commander, and that Hazael would become the next King of Aram (Syria).
All these things had taken place. Elisha had taken over from Elijah. Jehu had destroyed the house of Ahab and now his grandson Jehoash was the king of Israel. Hazael had killed Ben-Hadad and was the king of Aram. Now Aram was a constant trouble to the Northern Kingdom of Israel. Both Jehu and Jehoahaz had been defeated by Aram and now Israel’s military was almost completely destroyed. Only 50 horses, 10 chariots and a few thousand soldiers remained (2 Kings 13:7) to fight the many thousand soldiers of Hazael’s army. The situation was desperate and it seemed that Hazael would surely destroy Jehoash and Israel. In this dark time comes an unusual encounter:
1. Lean on Christ for SALVATION - (vs. 14)
Eph 2:8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-- 9 not by works, so that no one can boast.
We have been saved by grace alone. It is not our works or effort that saves us, only the work of Jesus on the cross. Jesus says that unless we become as children we will never see the kingdom of heaven. That means we need to learn to lean on Jesus, to realize that we are dependent on him for our salvation.
In this story the king was upset over the illness of the Elisha because it represented the last of God’s power which was the only way Israel would survive. Jehoash says to Elisha “My father! My father! The chariots and horsemen of Israel!” These were the same words Elisha said to Elijah when he was taken by God. Whatever the meaning it is clear that Elisha is close to death and that the king recognized that Elisha was the channel of the Lord’s power. With no successor, it was unclear who would be the next prophet to take Elisha’s place.
The first step to dealing with issues in your life is to recognize your need and go to the one who has the power to help you. Only Jesus can save you and only He has the power to change your life.
John 5:2 Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades. 3 Here a great number of disabled people used to lie--the blind, the lame, the paralyzed. 4 5 One who was there had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. 6 When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, "Do you want to get well?" 7 "Sir," the invalid replied, "I have no one to help me into the pool when the water is stirred. While I am trying to get in, someone else goes down ahead of me." 8 Then Jesus said to him, "Get up! Pick up your mat and walk." 9 At once the man was cured; he picked up his mat and walked.
This man believed what he had been told – that if by some magical way the water was stirred and you were the first to get in then you would be healed. He spent all his time and energy chasing after that dream. He did not recognize that the one who was speaking to him was the real healer. Maybe you have been chasing some other form of healing in your own life. Maybe you have thought that the key to healing your marriage was just being a little nicer or the key to a happy family was just making a little more money. Go to Jesus. Only He can help you be the man you want to be.
In the years 1014-1035 there ruled over England a Danish king named Canute. King Canute tired of hearing his retainers flatter him with extravagant praises of his greatness, power and invincibility. He ordered his chair to be set down on the seashore, where he commanded the waves not to come in and wet him. No matter how forcefully he ordered the tide not to come in, however, his order was not obeyed. Soon the waves lapped around his chair. One historian tells us that, therefore, he never wore his crown again, but hung it on a statue of the crucified Christ.
2. Lean on Christ for STRENGTH (vs. 15-17)
Is 40:30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
Who was better able to shoot an arrow - the strong King of Israel or an old dying prophet? I am surprised that the king didn’t just say to Elisha “leave me alone - I can do it myself”. Often we think we can do what the Lord tells us to do in our own strength but we cannot. We need to follow the directions He gives us.
I remember trying to set up a doll house for my daughter one Christmas Eve. It took hours to put it together. Just when I thought it was almost done I realized I had missed something. I had to tear the whole thing apart and start again because I had not read the instructions. A lot of people are like that. They try to build a life for themselves but what they get does not work. Maybe it is time to read the instructions! Go to the one who can help and do what He says.
Matt. 11:29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
When we are yoked with Jesus 2 things happen. First, our steps are guided. When we are yoked together with Jesus He guides our steps and leads us in the way in which we should go. There is an old movie called the 39 Steps where a man is handcuffed to a woman and the 2 are trying to escape. The one keeps trying to get away but they can’t because they are joined together.
One morning a couple of cowboys went out on the range to bring in a wild steer from the mountains. They took along with them one of those shaggy little gray donkeys -- a burro. Now a big three-year old steer that’s been running loose in the timber is a tough customer to handle. Nevertheless, these cowboys had a technique for handling this steer. They got a rope on the steer and then they tied him neck and neck, right up close, to the burro and let them go. At first, the burro had a bad time. The steer threw him all over the place. He banged him against trees, rocks, into bushes. Time after time they both went down. But there was one great difference between the burro and the steer. The burro had an idea. He wanted to go home. And no matter how often the steer threw him every time the burro got to his feet he took a step nearer the corral. This went on and on. After about a week, the burro showed up at the corral. He had with him the tamest and sorriest-looking steer you ever saw.
Second, our burdens are lifted. When we are yoked together with Jesus he carries the weight for us. I remember trying to move a refrigerator. It was hard until some others arrived and then I was hardly carrying anything. Trust in the power of God and not in our own strength in times of difficulty.
3. Lean on Christ for SUCCESS (vs. 18-19)
I said that only Jesus has the power to change your life. That does not mean that you do nothing and God does everything. We need to take what we have been given and use it passionately.
The answer to the King’s problem was not in the hands of Elisha, but in the hands of the King. The response of the king determined the answer to the king’s problem. The King did as he was told, but not whole heartedly. The way the king responded showed the king’s heart. The arrow which was given the King was an arrow of victory. We too have been given the victory in Jesus. We have the power and authority to move out and destroy the enemy. However, far too often we do not use the power we are given. You may be saying - “I want to grow in my relationship with the Lord this year”. Good, do it! God has done His part, it’s time for you to do yours.
You have many arrows of victory in your quiver today. One of them is prayer. One is fellowship. Another is bible study. We often have not because we ask not. Use what you have with all your heart.
Dead Poets Society is a great film. In his first lesson with his senior class, the rather eccentric but very inspiring English teacher John Keating, played by Robin Williams, takes the boys into the foyer outside the classroom where he asks one to read out a poem. "Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, old time is still a-flying. And this same flower that smiles today tomorrow will be dying." "Carpe deum - Seize the day ", Keating says to them, "Every single one of us is just food for worms. You may be destined for great things, but you need to take the opportunity now." Then he leads his class up to the cabinet in the foyer, filed with old, black and white photos of students from many years ago. "What do all these boys, your illustrious predecessors, have in common?" asks Keating. "They’re all fertilizing daffodils. They’re all dead. They were boys with high expectations, high ideals, just like you. They felt they were invincible, thought that the world was their oyster, just like you. But did they manage to fulfill even a tiny bit of their potential? - Carpe deum. Seize the day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary."
The quotation from Henry David Thoreau read at the beginning of each meeting is incorrect. It actually reads: "I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived … I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear … I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner…" (Walden, 1854).
A few years ago People Magazine published an article entitled "Dead Ahead" telling about a new clock that keeps track of how much time you have left to live. It calculates an average life using a variety of different factors. You program your sex and age into the clock and then from that it will tell you how much time you have left to live. It sold for $99.95. It is an intriguing idea. In fact, that’s what the Psalmist told us to do:
Psalm 90:12 Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
Alfred Nobel was a Swedish chemist who made his fortune by inventing dynamite and other powerful explosive materials. Those materials, purchased by major governments around the world, were used to produce weapons of destruction. When Nobel’s brother died, one newspaper printed Alfred’s obituary by mistake. In it, Nobel was described as a man who became rich by enabling other people to kill each other in unprecedented numbers. When someone sent a copy to him, Alfred Nobel was so shaken by the assessment of his life that he resolved to use the fortune he had amassed to reward accomplishments that benefited humanity rather than destroy it. He established what we now know as “the Nobel Peace Prize.”
Alfred Nobel had a rare opportunity. He was given the chance to see an evaluation of his life while he was still alive and able to change it. I sometimes wonder what each of us would do if we could have that same opportunity. What kind of epitaph would be on our gravestones if it were written today? And if we were given a chance to change things, to rewrite the obituary, how effective would we be at making changes?
