Summary: Sometimes people seem to know your sensitivity to a topic or issue and can and will take advantage of it in order to get you to pop your button. Do you know anyone like this? Maybe you are good at getting someone else to pop their buttons.

Buttons and Zippers

James Chapter 3

James 1:26

If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless.

In the title of the sermon you will notice two words that are not found in the bible. I checked 14 different bible versions and nowhere are the words button or zipper found. Since something is not in the bible does that mean that we should not use it?

Should we all go home and cut the buttons from off our pants and shirts or cut out the zippers from off our clothing. I think that would be a bad idea. I know that I for one need my buttons and need my zippers because they serve a purpose.

Not only do they keep my cloths fastened together they help keep my cloths from getting caught in things like car doors, drawers, and fences. Buttons and zippers really serve to protect us from embarrassment and injury.

But sometimes we use a phrase that identifies the power of the button when we say …he really knows how to push my buttons or she really knows which button to push.

These phrases speak to how others know what our ability to be restrained is. Sometimes people seem to know your sensitivity to a topic or issue and can and will take advantage of it in order to get you to pop your button. Do you know anyone like this? Maybe you are good at getting someone else to pop their buttons.

The button is thought to have turned up around 2800 BC. The first button was worn by a guy named Clog who used it to fasten his pants after he realized he ate to many dinosaur ribs at the rib festival. His button was just a piece of bone with a hole in it but it was much easier to use than a piece of rope. (I made up the part about Clog)

But really buttons have been around for about 5,000 years in various shapes and sizes and in various cultures. It would seem that the entire world discovered that we all needed buttons.

Now the zipper is a different story. It first showed up in 1851 when a man in the United States Elias Howe invented hooks that ran along each side of the fabric and you then laced it together in order to keep the cloth closed. It was in 1914 that a Swedish inventor Gideon Sundback working for an American company came up with the modern zipper.

But what does all this talk of buttons and zippers have to do with the bible? Well I am sure many of you are familiar with the old adage …. Button your mouth or the more modern version … keep it zipped. These warning phrases came as a result of a lot of experience with both buttons and zippers. What our great, grandparents discovered was that accidents occurred when we failed to keep things buttoned up properly or zipped up securely. Some of us have paid dearly for not keeping our mouths buttoned up or zipped up.

In the back of our bibles is a book written by Jesus half brother James. James is a half brother because Jesus father was God and James father was Joseph but they were still brothers both born of Mary. James wrote a book that bares his name and in it he addresses the problem of the tongue.

James warns us in James 3:5

Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.

Now sometimes the fire we start can be a slow burn or if the forest has been without rain for awhile it can be a huge forest fire that can erupt, all set off by a single word.

James goes on to say in James 3:6

The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.

Maybe you know of someone who ruined their life because of something they said. Presidents, kings, queens and common folk like us have all fell victims to the destructive power of their own tongues.

Entire nations have been felled by a single loose word remember during world war two… loose lips sink ships.

Proverbs 21:23 He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.

This week I was victim to my own tongue when my daughter showed up at home unexpectedly. She was looking for her mail. I am usually the first one to the mail box so I always pre-screen it. I found what I thought was a credit card company letter addressed to my daughter. It looked like the kind of letter that always made some kind of free offer if you signed up. I usually tear them in half then dispose of them but this time I just threw it away.

I thought I was doing her a favor and I threw it in the recycle bin on the front porch. She arrived to check her mail and discovered it in the bin outside. What happened next involved her knowing which of my buttons to push and me forgetting to keep my mouth zipped up.

It turned out the letter was not from a credit card company trying to solicit her business. It was a letter containing tickets to a concert. They were a Christmas present for her boyfriends family. She must have had a hard day at work that day because she barley took a breath before pushing my buttons.

What are you doing throwing away my mail? Why do you even bother to touch something that is not addressed to you? How many times do I have to tell you to leave my stuff alone?

These were some of the questions she used to push my buttons I may have paraphrased a little but you get the idea. I had the best of intentions I thought I was doing her a big favor. She is always complaining about her debt. It looked like junk mail to me. It was addressed to my address but she does not live here so I figured that gave me the right to pre-screen the mail. Wrong.

All this set up the exploding zipper that was until that point properly closed and sealed on my mouth. I fired back in my defense explaining that she should really change her address if she wants to avoid this kind of misunderstanding. She fired back repeating her earlier accusations. I told her how I had almost torn the letter in half. That’s when things began to escalate and it became more important to win the battle than to be the adult in the situation.

Since she has moved out she has made rules about visiting her at her boyfriends house. We are to call first and set up a time and then if there are no conflicts we can visit. But on the other hand she can return home whenever she wants unannounced day or night and that is supposed to be fine. I made her aware of this discrepancy in her rules and she left in a huff. I did not hear what she said as she left but it was clear I had stopped listening some time ago.

I realized I was wrong to have said what I did but it came out despite my best efforts. Friends this little slice of my life is offered to all of you as a lesson to tech you and I the benefits of holding your tongue. It also teaches us to keep our buttons done up.

Proverbs 21:23 He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.

I now notice that it is both my tongue and my mouth that I have to learn to guard. I also realize that two wrongs don’t make a right.

Later that same day I attended session and shared part of this story. After session I went back to Wallaceburg stopped at the dollar store bought a card and some candy and left a note of apology in my daughters mailbox addressed to her. She has not responded since but that’s O.K. I at least realized my wrong and I am sorry for it.

Friends have you said or done something to push the buttons of a loved one lately? Is there someone you need to apologize to?

1Peter 3:10 For, "Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech.

1Peter 4:8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.

Learn to hold your tongue and stay buttoned up.