Summary: Though necessary, I often find it hard to preach sermons to the women of our church in relation to their role as wives and mothers. Paul had a better idea. Much of such preaching could be done without the pastor. The aged women were to teach the younger!

Trans-Generational Values

Mother’s Day Sermon 2014

May 11, 2014

Titus 2:3-5

Titus 2:3-5 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

OPEN:

QUOTE: I know that what many want me to do is to gather us all around the juke box, grab a beer, put on a tear-jerker song and have a good cry about mama. I don’t find that anywhere in the Bible. Instead, the Bible tells us how to be a mama and how to treat a mama. lkw

"I want a church of young people!" a pastor once said to me, forgetting that one day he would be old himself. A church needs both the old and the young, and they should minister to one another. The grace of God enables us to bridge the generation gap in the church. One way to do this is for all members, young and old, to live up the standards that God has set for our lives. Bible Exposition Commentary (BE Series) - New Testament - The Bible Exposition Commentary – New Testament, Volume 2.

• There are many roles within the office of pastor (and other church leaders).

• One of the roles is that of striking a balance between the needs of the older members of the church and the young members.

• Tilt the balance too far and the church will die.

• Tilt to the young too far and it will die quickly as you empty the church before it can grow.

• Tilt to the elderly too far and it will die slowly as no young people fill the spot in the pew left by the dying older member.

• We at Calvary are seeking the balance, and it will take some adjustment on the part of both groups.

• In our sermon today, Paul has upon his heart the transmission from one generation to the next the values that are important.

• Some things change, and they should.

• Some things must never change!

INTRODUCTION:

• The book of Titus belongs to a little family of three letters that we call the Pastoral Epistles.

• There is one writer, the Apostle Paul, and there are two recipients, the young pastors – Timothy and Titus.

• In those days God spoke to the Apostles like Paul, they communicated the truth to others through their preaching and, most importantly, through their writing.

• In the Pastoral Epistles, we have God communicating something to Paul, he communicates it to Timothy and Titus, and he then tells them to communicate it to others.

• Those others include pastors, deacons, older men, older women, younger men, younger women, widows, etc.

• Some truth was to be communicated directly.

• Other truth was to be communicated through others (older men, you tell the younger men, and, older women, you tell the younger women).

• In our text we have God telling Paul to tell Titus to tell the older women to teach the younger women a set of truths related to their faith, their family and the women who would follow them.

I. The Trust (2:3)

(The respect, reverence, influence, veneration, influence, platform as a result of her age and testimony)

Titus 2:3 The aged women likewise,

QUOTE: One of the strongest forces for spiritual ministry in the local church lies with the older believers. Those who are retired have time for service. It is good to see that many local churches have organized and mobilized these important people. In my own ministry, I have been greatly helped by senior saints who knew how to pray, teach the Word, visit, troubleshoot, and help build the church. Bible Exposition Commentary

• One of the benefits of living a life of wisdom is the platform that it gives you to have a voice in the lives of others.

• There is a respect afforded to one who has done it well.

• Paul has in mind just such a lady.

• Before any young lady is going to hear you say “you ought to be like this,” they have a right to determine whether or not they want to be like you!

• Ultimately, we follow the Lord.

• But the Lord has instructed us to follow our teachers.

• When there is no inconsistency of life and lips, then one can say with Paul, “Follow me as I follow Christ.”

• We want others to look at us and say, “I would like to be like that!”

II. The Testimony (2:3)

A. Godly Living (2:3; Ruth 3:11)

2:3 that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness,

QUOTE: The word translated "aged women" is presbutis, which occurs only here in the New Testament. The word translated "behavior" occurs only here as well and refers to deportment or demeanor. The way a woman moves, the look on her face, what she says or leaves unsaid, and her habitual attitude of mind and body are all included in "behavior."

And what did Paul expect mature women in the faith to project through their postures and personalities? Holiness! The word translated "as becometh holiness" occurs only here in the New Testament and means "reverent." The deportment of older Christian women must reflect true sanctification of life. John Phillips Commentary Series

Ruth 3:11 [Boaz says] And now, my daughter [Ruth], fear not; I will do to thee all that thou requirest: for all the city of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous woman.

B. Godly Speech (2:3; 1 Tim. 3:11)

2:3 not false accusers,

1 Timothy 3:11 Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things.

NOTE: They must not spread slanderous stories. It is a curious trait of human nature that most people would rather repeat and hear a malicious tale than one to someone's credit. It is no bad resolution to make up our minds to say nothing at all about people if we cannot find anything good to say. Barclay's Daily Study Bible (NT).

QUOTE: The Holy Spirit also desires to develop sincerity in older women. They are to be "not false accusers." The word translated "false accusers" is diabolos, which occurs thirty-eight times in the New Testament and is usually translated "devil." Thirty-four of those times it refers to Satan. Once it refers to the traitor Judas, who became Satan's emissary (John 6:70). Evidently, therefore, slander is the work of the Devil. The word diabolos implies a verbal assault. Nothing could be more destructive of harmony in a local church than a few older women hurling slanderous remarks against various people in the fellowship. John Phillips Commentary Series

• God tells is like it is, and twice in the Pastoral Epistles he tells women not to be slanderers, or false accusers.

• When it comes to the next point, he tells the deacons once and the women once.

• But slanderers is given twice to women.

• Of the 38 times that this word occurs in the N.T., 34 times it is the Devil, and of the 4 remaining times, half are to women, and of the 2 times that are left, one of those is related to Judas!

• Work on it!

C. Godly Appetites (2:3; 1 Tim. 3:8; Prov. 20:1)

2:3 not given to much wine,

1 Timothy 3:8 Likewise must the deacons be grave, not doubletongued, not given to much wine, not greedy of filthy lucre;

• Wine was a real problem in the early church.

• We can tell that by how many times he addresses the issue in his letters.

• In my study I find that wine, used as an easily preserved beverage was usually diluted.

• The Bible cautions about the use of full-strength wine.

• I can say that the Bible does not forbid wine, but it cautions against it.

• I have a refrigerator and a Pepsi today, and see no need for it whatsoever.

• One things is sure, the Bible forbids drunkenness.

Proverbs 20:1 Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging: and whosoever is deceived thereby is not wise.

III. The Teaching (2:3; 1 Tim. 5:13-15)

2:3 teachers of good things;

NOTE: This could have been the fourth item under her testimony. She should be known for the habit of her teaching and the content of her teaching!

• In 1 Timothy, Paul had a warning for widows who had lost their husbands fairly early in life.

• As we read this, hold it in your mind as a background for Paul’s “better suggestion” or alternative that is contained in our text.

1 Timothy 5:13-15 And withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house; and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things which they ought not. 14 I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully. 15 For some are already turned aside after Satan.

A. Her Habit of Teaching

• Rather than a habit of being “tattlers and busybodies speaking those things which they ought not” Paul has a better idea for the older women.

• She is known as a teacher.

• Her life lessons are not kept in her own heart.

• She wants to share what she has learned not to do, what she has learned to do, with a generation following.

B. The Content of Her Teaching (1 Kings 22:52; 2 Ch. 22:3; Pr. 31:1)

“good things”

• We could render this as “teach them what is good.”

• It is not that her teaching is described as good, though it certainly is.

• It is that she will teach the younger women what is good and how to get it done!

• Note two examples of mothers teaching what is wrong, and one example of a mother who taught what is right.

MOTHERS WHO TAUGHT CHILDREN TO DO WRONG.

1 Kings 22:52 And he [NOTE: Ahaziah, elder son of Ahab, 9th king of Israel, 853-852 B.C.] did evil in the sight of the LORD, and walked in the way of his father, and in the way of his mother [NOTE: Jezebel], and in the way of Jeroboam the son of Nebat, who made Israel to sin:

2 Chronicles 22:3 He [NOTE: Ahaziah, son of the cursed and despised Jehoram, son of Ahab and brother of Ahaziah above, 6th King of Judah, 841 B.C.] also walked in the ways of the house of Ahab: for his mother [NOTE: Athaliah, granddaughter of Omri] was his counsellor to do wickedly.

MOTHER WHO TAUGHT CHILDREN WHAT IS RIGHT

Proverbs 31:1 The words of king Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.

QUOTE: When it comes to the older women, Paul's emphasis is on teaching: "teachers of good things." Experienced, godly women are usually excellent teachers. The word teach in Titus 2:4 is related to the word translated "temperate" in Titus 2:2, and probably should be translated, "that they may train by making sober-minded." It is not only that the older women should show the younger mothers how to keep house, but that they put within their hearts and minds the right spiritual and mental attitudes. BEC

IV. The Target (2:4)

Her audience.

4 That they may teach the young women

A. Requires Respect

ILLUS: A doctor who smokes.

• We spoke of this early in this sermon.

• It is the respect that comes from her age.

• And it is the respect that comes from her life!

B. Requires Relationship

• This requires a heart for others.

• That takes time.

• This takes effort.

• This may require financial investment.

• This can’t be done with the harried mother whose world is her job!

QUOTE: It is sad that some people have with them at all times a bucket of cold water to pour onto the dreams and aspirations of the young. How refreshing is the older woman that says, “This is what is good, I have done it, this is how it has helped me, here is how you can do it and here is how it will benefit you.” lkw

V. The Task (2:4-5)

2:4 to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands,

A. Relating to the Head

1. Sober sophranizo – to make of a sound mind, discipline, correct.

2. Discreet sôphrôn – safe or sound in mind, self-controlled (moderate as to opinion or passion). This related to the word “temperate” in verse 2.

• The younger women are to be taught to be even-keeled.

• They are to be reasoned and reasonable.

• They are to carefully evaluate (think through) situations and not respond based on feeling alone.

B. Relating to the Heart

QUOTE: The godly older women have the responsibility of teaching the younger women how to be successful wives, mothers, and housekeepers; and the younger women have the responsibility of listening and obeying. The Christian home was a totally new thing, and young women saved out of paganism would have to get accustomed to a whole new set of priorities and privileges. Those who had unsaved husbands would need special encouragement. Bible Exposition Commentary

1. Love their husbands – Not natural. Needs to be taught.

QUOTE: Paul said that young married women should be taught to "love their husbands." The word translated "love husbands" is philandros, which occurs only here in the New Testament. Philandros conveys the idea of tender affection. Most marriages experience stresses and strains, so we have to work to keep love preeminent in our domestic relationships.

Three little words, I love you, can ease a couple through many stormy seas. As someone has said, "I is the subject, you is the object, and there is nothing between but love." Love affects the look, the tone of voice, and the touch of the hand. Love is accompanied by an attitude of willing, joyful service and personal, caring solicitude. Such love is a commodity made in heaven, a balm for all of earth's woes, and a sure remedy when all else fails. John Phillips Commentary Series

2. Love their children – Not natural. Must be taught.

• Some children are easy to love, but we most love all!

• We must learn what love is and what it is not.

• Difference between love and doting.

• Balance between love and discipline.

• Difference between a buddy and a parent.

QUOTE: Surely a mother loves her children! Yes, this is a natural instinct; but this instinct needs to be controlled. I once heard a "modern mother" say, "I love my child too much to spank her." In reality, she had a selfish love for herself and did not really love the child. "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him" (Prov. 13:24, niv). While it was usually the father who disciplined the children in Eastern homes, the mother could not escape being a part of the procedure, or else a child would run to its mother for protection. Bible Exposition Commentary

QUOTE: In these permissive days, it is necessary to speak plainly. A child who has unacceptable behavior without consequences will result in a parent without control.

APPLY: If a child’s behavior and the parent says I spanked them once for that, that is like saying I won’t need gas in my car this week because I put some in last week! No! Every time!

3. Good agathos – Good in the general sense. One who benefits. One who acts or does well.

QUOTE: "Good" (Titus 2:5) can be translated "kind." She does not rule her household with an iron hand, but practices "the law of kindness" (Prov. 31:26). BEC

Proverbs 31:26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

C. Relating to Holiness

Chaste hagnos. Clean, innocent, modest, pure.

• In light of what we know of the Cretans, their newly converted girls would need much instruction.

• It would taking much teaching over time to counter the society.

• Imagine the wife whose mother is not a believer.

• The mother fills the daughter with the Cretan way.

• Paul says, find a godly woman, let her model holiness and let her teach holiness.

ILLUS: My friend’s wife’s mother who told her to leave her husband.

D. Relating to the Home

1. Keepers at Home oikourgos Guarder of the home, stayer at home, domestically inclined, a good housekeeper.

She who takes offense at the term “domestic” or to the domestic role that God has assigned to her, knows nothing of the Biblical view of godly womanhood. lkw

QUOTE: "Keepers at home" does not suggest that her home is a prison where she must be kept! "Caring for the home" is the idea. "Guide the house," Paul wrote (1 Tim. 5:14). The wise husband allows his wife to manage the affairs of the household, for this is her ministry. Bible Exposition Commentary

1 Timothy 5:14 I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.

2. Obedient to their own husbands hupotasso To subordinate, be subject to, to submit oneself to, to line up under one.

ILLUSTRATIVE USES (Lk. 2:51; Rom. 8:7; 13:1; Eph. 5:24; Jam. 4:7; 1 Cor. 11:3)

Luke 2:51 And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.

Romans 8:7 Because the carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be.

Romans 13:1 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.

Ephesians 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

• Listen to Paul on the subject.

1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

• Do you think that Christ is inferior? No!

• Yet He submits Himself to the will of the Godhead, even to the Father.

• God’s order, when followed, is not debasing.

• You can believe God or you can believe modern feminists.

• But remember, you will never stand before a modern feminist.

• We must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ.

QUOTE: "But you don't know my husband," some wives plaintively complain. Maybe we don't, but God does. And that is what matters. These rules are not ours; they are not even the apostle Paul's. They are God's rules and must not be changed. John Phillips Commentary

VI. The Tragedy (2:5)

2:5 that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Blasphemed blasphemeô To vilify, speak impiously, defame, rail on, revile, speak evil.

• When the unconverted see those who claim to be followers of light and love, fall into darkness and hate, it puts the source of light and love into darkness in their minds.

• God knows that we men do enough to shame the faith.

• Today, we have looked at how our women can preserve the testimony of the church.

CONCLUSION

• Our passage is very clear.

• If you have young children at home, the home is to be your focus.

• But when your children have grown, that focus is to transfer to the training of your adult daughters, their friends, and any other young ladies that come under your influence.

• This is NOT a class at a church.

• This is the conversation on the way to deliver relief.

• This is a chat around the oven while making a meal for a needy person.

• These are life lessons that are as much CAUGHT as they are TAUGHT!

• Paul was wise in having Titus to let the older women do such teaching.

• As a minister of the gospel, all texts, including this one, are available to me to preach.

• But I will say that there can be an awkwardness at times in preaching to women.

• How much better if ladies would step up and make such formal instruction obsolete!

ILLUS: Dr. Sightler’s response to my suggestion about the homecoming events at our church. “You let the women handle that.”

QUOTE: The true female victims today are not women who are willingly bound by love to the Lord, to their husbands, and to their children. The true victims are rather those women who have been deceived by unbiblical and satanic feminist ideas about being liberated from God and from the home. MacArthur New Testament Commentary