Summary: Life is stressful with strained and broken relationships at the core of our stress. God created us to be in relationships and in His Word we find key principles for relationship restoration. Join us as we go beyond restoration to hope.

Lakeview CHURCH November 16, 2014

Series - New Beginnings – Part 1

Humility . Grace . Hope

Relationship Introduction:

Walk on stage and on a big white easel board write: “Relationships” - Note: I will diagram the sermon on a large flip chart sheet as I preach.)

Turn and pause let that word sink in.

1-4 If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.

5-8 Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn’t think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn’t claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death—and the worst kind of death at that—a crucifixion.

9-11 Because of that obedience, God lifted him high and honored him far beyond anyone or anything, ever, so that all created beings in heaven and on earth—even those long ago dead and buried—will bow in worship before this Jesus Christ, and call out in praise that he is the Master of all, to the glorious honor of God the Father. Philippians 2:1-11 (MSG)

That is the plea from Paul in his letter to the Philippians found in chapter 2 verses 1-11.

Paul was calling out the people because he knew why each of us was created, given breath and life and what must happen for our lives to be fulfilled, full of joy with a since of purpose and completeness.

You see in Genesis we read of how God created the world, on the first day God created the light and separated the light and the darkness and saw it was good; on the second day God created the expanses separating the waters form sky which God called heaven and saw it was good; on the third day God gathered the water together leaving the land and called it earth and upon it God created vegetation and the trees and saw it was good; and on the fourth day God created the lights to be hung in the expanse of the sky, the sun, the moon and the stars and God saw it was good; and on the fifth day God created the birds of the air and the creatures of the sea and God saw it was good and blessed them; and on the sixth day God created the living creatures to roam on the land and God saw it was good, after creating all that we know is beautiful and perfect in this world God was not satisfied so on that sixth day as the crowning moment of creation God said, “Let us make man in our own image, after our own likeness,” and after God created man and women He saw that it was VERY GOOD!”

But notice what God said on that sixth day, “Let us . . . make man in our own image, after our own likeness.” You see before this world was spoken into existence, before there was a sky, the son or moon or stars, before there was land and birds and animals before there was any matter there was communion and community, there were relationships between the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. At the center of the universe in eternity past there were relationships. In the Great Commandment Jesus told us, “To love the Lord God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind and with all your strength. And to love your neighbor as yourself.” Friends, life and death and eternity is all dependent on Relationships.

(write above the word Relationships on the paper “It’s All About . . .”)

Psychologists, doctors and researches over the years have shown that humans are hard wired to connect. They could have saved a lot of money if they would have just read the Bible. Researches, using ultrasound technology, have observed twins in the womb offering comfort, with pats on the shoulder, when one or the other seems to be in distress. We have become so self indulgent that we have replaced relationships with things; houses, jobs, looks, cars, achievements, “the person who dies with the most toys wins” mentality. If God’s word is true than our satisfaction, purpose, and joy can only be fulfilled in relationships, otherwise why did Jesus die? I have never stood over a bed of a person close to their last breath who desired one more day to ride in their car, one more day to go fishing, one more day to make that sale, no they would take one more day to spend with their wife, children, grandchildren, it’s always and will ever be all about relationships. You see apart from relationships we have no way of knowing who we are or who we may become, no way of having joy, satisfaction or purpose.

Returning to the story in Genesis, shortly after creation when all was “very good,” we read of the relationship between God and Adam and Eve coming apart. You have heard the story, God told Adam and Eve not to eat fruit from the tree of knowledge, of good and evil for if they did they would surely die. Well as you know they did and they did. And the relationship between God and Adam and Eve was broken. And while we don’t read about it, I have to believe that the relationship between Adam and Eve was broken as well (write on the board between “It’s All About and Relationships, “Broken”). And from that day until now and until Christ returns we are dealing with broken relationships, both with God and with others (write on the board below Relationships, “with God/with others). But make no mistake this was man’s choice and with it came consequences, which we are faced with every day. But also make no mistake ever since that day in the garden God with all His heart, with all His soul, with all His mind, and with all His strength has been working to mend our broken relationship with Him and demonstrating to us how we by His power and His example can mend our broken relationships with each other (write on the board below Relationships and between with God and with others, “Restored”).

So over the next three weeks we will be looking at God’s example of how to restore broken relationships.

One of my favorite chapters in the entire Bible is Romans chapter 8; it’s so powerful and promising! But I love verse 37, “In all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us” (write on the board below with God and with others, “More than Conquerors”). We’re not talking about just getting along in our relationships, no, we’re talking about moving beyond getting along, we’re talking about being conquerors over our broken relationships, not only with God but with each other.

Before we dive into God’s plan for our relationships lets pause and pray that God through His Holy Spirit would open our hearts and minds to the specific relationships that each of us need to be focused on today.

Let’s pray: “Father and God we come to you today, in this moment and ask that your Holy Spirit would speak to each of us; that we might see clearly the relationships in our lives and the condition of which they are in. That your Holy Spirit may convict us, guide us, and humble us that we may be more than conquerors according to your promises. In the name of Jesus, in whom provides restoration of our relationship with you, we pray Amen.”

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So how many of you have strained or broken relationships in your life? At work, at school, at home? Ok so I am going to assume you have a specific person your thinking of right now, that’s good.

Now lets back up and take a look at the words of Paul to the Philippians in chapter 2, specifically I want to look at verses 5-8:

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, 6 who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, 7 but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”

Adam and Eve made a choice that broke the relationship off with God. They sinned, which was disobeying what God had instructed them to do. And what did God do, “For God loved you and me so much and cherished our relationship with Him so bad that He sent His Son, Jesus to provide restoration for our relationship. And it is here in Philippians that we see what Jesus did that laid the groundwork whereby our relationship could be restored. What does it say in verse 8? “He humbled Himself” (write on the board below More than Conquerors, “Step 1: Humility”). So let me ask you, the relationship you are thinking of today, do you cherish it so much that you are willing to humble yourself so that restoration may begin? Or maybe it’s a relationship that you don’t cherish, but you know it’s necessary for you in your life? Something has to change? Maybe it’s your pride that’s in the way. Let me share with you several biblical points regarding the risk you face in holding on to pride.

Pride Brings destruction – Proverbs 11:2

Pride leaves little hope for improvement – Proverbs 26:12

Pride causes on to forget God – Psalms 10:4/James 4:13-16

Pride leads to God’s discipline – Proverbs 29:23 (We are commanded to humble ourselves, but if we

don’t, as children of God, He promises to humble us.)

Pride causes us to lose the promises of God – James 4:6-10

Pride causes blindness to our own condition – Revelation 3:14-17

So lets look at what humility is and then we will look at three specific steps each of us must take to lay the foundation whereby a relationship can be restored.

Charles Spurgeon the great preacher defined humility as, “making a right estimate of one’s self.”

Another speaker defined humility as, “not denying the power of gifting you have, but admitting that the gifting is from God and the power comes through you not from you.” Winston Churchill after World War II humbly said, “I was not the lion, but it fell to me to give the lion’s war.”

So what is humility? It’s not timidity, weakness, or being a wimp. No, humility is standing before God at the cross in all your weaknesses and failures and then living life in the shadow and power of the cross.”

When our relationship was broken Jesus humbled Himself at the cross for us. He laid down His life for ours on a cruel cross taking our punishment, death, shedding is blood that the price of our disobedience, sin, could be forgiven and our relationship with God could be restored. Restored relationships always begin with humility. Just as Jesus humbled Himself at the cross we too must humble ourselves at the cross, realizing the condition we are in and that our relationship with God is broken, we can do nothing about it but fall on our knees at the foot of the cross, broken and without hope. You see, humility is born at the foot of the cross.

That person you were thinking of that you have a broken relationship with and you know it needs to be restored what do you do. First you humble yourself before God and talk to God about the situation. Don’t run off and try to fix them. Stop and pray for the situation, pray for them and pray for yourself (write on the board below Humility, “a. Pray: For yourself/them”). And that doesn’t mean to pray that your egocentric boss, who is a jerk, a sexist and a very unfortunate looking individual who always puts you down in the weekly meeting just happens to come down with the 365 day flu. No, humbly get on your knees and pray that God would cause a shift in the relationship. Pray that your attitude might change, that your understanding might change, that the other persons attitude might change, that their understanding might change, pray that each of you might understand the motives behind your words or actions. In James chapter 4 verses 1-3 we read.

“What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. 3 You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” James 4:1-3

So humility is born at the cross and grows up in the time of prayer. Humility in prayer is not asking for revenge or even an apology, humility in prayer is seeking understanding of who you are and who the other person is and how the two can live and love one another. O’ you may never be best friends but you can demonstrate the love of Christ. Humility is born at the cross and grows up in the time of prayer.

Secondly, humility is demonstrated by one person taking the initiative (write on the board “b. Take the initiative . . . act now). Jesus was comfortable in heaven with the Father and Holy Spirit and then in the Garden Adam and Eve broke the relationship. The Old Testament testifies that when God gave us the law by which we could keep and restore our relationship with Him we couldn’t keep it and all hope was lost for restoring the relationship with our creator our God. But then we read in Romans 5, verse 8 that, “But God shows His love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” We didn’t ask Jesus to come down in the form of a man, we didn’t ask Jesus to go to a cross to shed His blood for our sins, but He knew we couldn’t so He did. God loved us so much He sent His Son, and His Son Jesus took it upon Himself to provide the shedding of His blood that our relationship could be restored so that what we were created for could be fulfilled, a relationship with the Father. God and His Son Jesus stepped up, they took the initiative, they took action they didn’t say, well they started this, or they owe me an apology, they wronged me so let them take the first stop. In Matthew chapter 5 beginning in verse 23 we read:

“This is how I want you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God.” Matthew 5:23-24

In this verse it’s clear that we are to take the initiative to restore our relationships. But we also see that unresolved conflict damages our relationship with God. We can be prideful and hard headed but in the end it is us who loses, twice, first in the relationship with another and secondly we damage our relationship with God.

And finally we need to confess our part in the broken relationship (write on the board, “c. confess”). In the garden when God confronted Adam and Eve with their actions of disobedience it was clear that God did not have anything to do with the two of them causing the broken relationship. But what we do know is that Adam blamed God, because when God asked Adam if he had eaten from the tree of knowledge and Adam said, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.” And when God asked Eve she blamed Satan. And ever since we have become masters at twisting and pointing blame to someone, something, or anything beyond our control. Humility demands that we who are sinners, and that’s you and me, own up to our part of the conflict, don’t shift the blame and accept responsibility. Think about the relationship that you know is broken and in need of repair in your life, now let me tell you the truth . . . both individuals in some way contribute to the brokenness in the relationship and if you don’t believe that, you need to return to the foot of the cross and understand who you are before God, or you maybe you believe that but you don’t understand how, in that case you need to get back on your knees in prayer. Matthew chapter 7 verse 5 says:

“You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye.” Matthew 7:5

and in I John chapter 1 verse 8 we read.

“If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us.” I John 1:8

Let me say that confession is more than words. True confession says not only, “I am sorry for what I did or didn’t do”, but also I am going to change, I won’t do that again. The Bible calls this “repenting” (write on the board underneath confess, “Repent”), which simply means I am not going to do that again, I am going to pursue a different way. And in regards to your relationship with God it means to follow His way, not your way anymore. Peter tells us in Acts chapter 2 verse 38:

“Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” Acts 2:38

Let me ask you, that relationship that you are thinking of that is broken do you want restoration. Do you want to put the past beyond and figure out a better future? If so you must first understand that humility is born at the foot of the cross, it is there that we realize who we are in relationship to a perfect Lord who humbled Himself so that our relationship could be restored with God our Father. Secondly, we must humbly pray for our broken relationship that God by His Holy Spirit would give us wisdom and understanding. And just as Jesus humbled Himself taking the first step to restoration we must likewise take the first step in humility to go to the other person and admit our part in the broken relationship and in humility seek a new beginning.

Now, let me ask you in closing, “How is your relationship with God?” You see God loved you and sent His Son, Jesus, to pay the price for your sin, humbly going to the cross in order that through Him your relationship with God could be restored. If you humbly come to the cross, believe in Jesus as the Son of God that He died for you and you confess your sin that caused the broken relationship God will forgive you and give you His Spirit to lead and guide you and you will be sealed into the family of God for all eternity.

Or maybe your have entered into this relationship with the Father before but you have not been paying much attention to your relationship with your Lord and Savior. Humbly return to the foot of the cross, God unconditionally loves His children and desires with all that He is to welcome you back.

In closing I want to encourage you in your relationships.

God promises us in James 4:10, “Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord and He will exalt you.”

Remember as long as your alive you can change. Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

So as we read in I Peter 5:5, “Clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

God took the first step to you, today take your step to Him.

And just as God took a step to you won’t you take a step to another.

Let’s Pray:

(After the song.)

In our series New Beginnings next week we will take a look at the second step in Restoring Relationships, Grace.

Closing Prayer.

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Diagram on Large White Flip Chart

It’s All About . . .

Broken

RELATIONSHIPS

Restored

with God with Others

more than conquerors

Step 1: HUMILITY

a. Pray – for yourself . . . for them

b. Take the initiative . . . act now.

c. Confess – Repent