Summary: 10 principles for financial agreement in the family (Material adapted from Wayne A. Mack's book, Strengthening Your Marriage, Unit 5, pg. 113)

Introduction:

We should be one in the area of our finances, but easier said than done. It is unlikely that a married couple will be free from conflicts over finances. Several reasons: 1) Each of us is a sinner and inclined to be selfish 2) Raised in different homes and have different attitudes and ideas about money from their parents 3) Men and women are different and the use of finances shows this.

Thesis: 10 principles for financial agreement in the family

For instances:

1. Everything we have belongs to God

“Yours, O LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendor, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, O LORD, is the kingdom; you are exalted as head over all.” 1 Chronicles 29:11, NIV.

This is basic to stewardship. God is the owner and we are just the managers. Problems over money in a family unit usually come because we fail to have a biblical understanding of money and stuff. This stuff is temporary and God is the owner of it all anyway. Usually people have conflicts because they are operating according to unbiblical standards or value systems. Most financial conflicts in marriage are caused by a lack of understanding or submission to scriptural principles of money. Most financial conflicts can be solved when both individuals apply the biblical philosophy of money to their lives. This one is the most basic.

2. God is the one who gives us the ability to make money

“Wealth and honor come from you; you are the ruler of all things. In your hands are strength and power to exalt and give strength to all.” 1 Chronicles 29:12, NIV.

“But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your forefathers, as it is today.” Deuteronomy 8:18

How does God give us the ability to produce wealth? The 1965 film classic, Shenandoah, features a memorable and outlandish prayer. With his 8 children seated for dinner, the father, played by James Stewart observes, “Now, your mother wanted all of you raised as good Christians. And I might not be able to do that thorny job as well as she could, but I can do a little something about your manners.” After a forgetful son removes his cap, Stewart then leads them in this prayer. “Lord, we cleared this land; we plowed it, sowed it, and harvested. We cooked the harvest. It wouldn’t be here, we wouldn’t be eatin’ it, if we hadn’t done it all ourselves. We worked dog bone hard for every crumb and morsel, but we thank you just the same anyway Lord for this food we are about to eat. Amen”

3. God usually rewards hard work

“All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty.” Proverbs 14:23, NIV. Henry Ford said about building his first car, “So we worked morning, noon, and night. We worked till our muscles ached, worked till our nerves were so ragged that we could not endure the word ‘automobile.’ One day when all of us were near the breaking point I laid down my tools and said, ‘Well, boys, there’s one consolation anyway. Nobody can take this thing away from us unless he’s willing to work on it harder than we’ve worked. And so far I haven’t seen anyone who’s willing to do that!’” Henry Ford worked hard and the result was the Ford automobile.

4. There are many things more valuable than gold

“Better a little with the fear of the LORD than great wealth with turmoil. Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred.” Proverbs 15:16, 17, NIV. Two things here:

Vs. 17- Maintaining loving relationships and enjoying the basic things of life are more important than wealth and success. In the days of the Bible, meat was only eaten at a couple of meals a week. Better to have vegetables with those we love than a feast with people we are at odds with.

Vs. 16- I’d rather have Jesus than silver or gold; I’d rather be His than have riches untold; I’d rather have Jesus than houses or lands, I’d rather be led by His nail pierced hand, than to be the king of a vast domain or be held in sin’s dread sway, I’d rather have Jesus than anything this world affords today.

“What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?” Matthew 16:26, NIV.

5. Heavenly treasure is to be more desired than earthly treasure

““Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.” Matthew 6:19, 20, NIV.

Some people have a detailed strategy for accomplishing financial goals such as planning for retirement, managing a business or saving for a new home. But most have taken little time to actually plan to accomplish anything for the kingdom with our resources. We may talk about living from an eternal perspective, but we spend and invest as though this life is all there is. We need an eternity portfolio that recognizes these fundamental truths: 1) Everything we have belongs to God 2) Our stewardship of God’s resources in this life will affect how we live in eternity 3) Eternity is a whole lot longer than this earthly life.

6. Giving to the Lord’s work should be a joy

“Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. ” 2 Corinthians 9:6-7, NIV.

Many have learned the lesson that when it comes to money, we’ve got to look out for #1- and I don’t mean God. When we look at giving as deciding that we should give to “keep God and the preacher happy,” giving is an unpleasant chore. A circuit-riding preacher entered one church building with his young son, and dropped a coin into the offering box in the back. Not many came that Sunday, and those who did didn't seem too excited to be there. After the service, the preacher and son walked to the back, and he emptied the box. Out fell one coin. The young boy said, "Dad, if you'd have put more in, you'd have gotten more out!"

7. Covetousness and discontentment are sins

“Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”” Hebrews 13:5, NIV.

Hudson Taylor the founder of China Inland Mission, was facing a lack of finances in his ministry. He retreated to office and read the Bible awhile, then prayed a while, and then looked again at the finances. Then he would pray a while, read the Bible awhile, and look again at the finances. Then he prayed awhile and read the Bible.

After a while he left his office. His wife asked him, "What are we going to do?"

"We have a twenty seven cents and all the promises of God...what more do one need!"

8. We ought to labor, not simply so that we meet our needs, but that we might give to others

“One man gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty.” Proverbs 11:24, NIV.

“He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.” Ephesians 4:28, NIV.

We work for several reasons but one reason we often neglect, to share with those in need. As Christians, we must now live for others. This principle is more broad than just to counteract theft. We must work to give some away to those in need.

9. We must avoid get rich quick schemes

“Dishonest money dwindles away, but he who gathers money little by little makes it grow.” Proverbs 13:11, NIV.

“He who works his land will have abundant food, but the one who chases fantasies will have his fill of poverty. A faithful man will be richly blessed, but one eager to get rich will not go unpunished.” Proverbs 28:19, 20, NIV. Winning the lottery isn’t a guaranteed ticket to the good life, as these previous winners can attest:

--Juan Rodriguez: This New York City parking attendant was earning less than $30,000 in 2004 when he won $149 million in a Mega Millions drawing. But soon after taking the lump sum option of $88 million, his wife filed for divorce and was awarded half of his winnings.

--Billy Bob Harrell, Jr.: This preacher working as a stock boy at Home Depot struck it rich in 1997, winning $31 million in Texas’ lottery. Some 20 months later, after divorcing his wife and buying a half-dozen homes for relatives, he committed suicide using a shotgun.

10. We ought to seek the counsel of wise people when we are about to make major purchases

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” Proverbs 15:22, NIV.

“Make plans by seeking advice” Proverbs 20:18, NIV. We need to ask the RIGHT people. Beware: Some people have strong opinions about things they know little about. Why should their opinion count? Why should their thoughts have weight in this decision?