Summary: Love is not rude or self-seeking - 1 Corinthians chapter 13 verse 5 - PowerPoint slides to accompany this talk are available on request – email: gcurley@gcurley.info

SERMON OUTLINE:

Love is not rude:

• Definitions of rudeness:

• Rude behaviour.

• Rude language.

• Rude attitude.

• Rude attire.

• Solution to rudeness:

• Matthew chapter 22 verses 37-40:

• "Love your neighbour as yourself”.

• Matthew chapter 7 verse 12:

• "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".

Love is not self-seeking:

• Definition of self-seeking:

• Philippians chapter 2:

• Unity and Union (vs 1)

• Opinions and Attitudes (vs 2)

• Myself and Others (vs 3-4)

• Solution to self-seeking:

• Be like Jesus (vs 5-11)

SERMON BODY

• Tonight we are only looking at part of one verse from the Bible;

• So let’s read it in a variety of translations.

• N.I.V. “...it does not dishonour others, it is not self-seeking.”

• NKJV: “…does not behave rudely, does not seek its own.”

• ESV: “…or rude. It does not insist on its own way.”

• GNB: "...love is not ill-mannered or selfish"

• TRANSITION: Now love might not be rude, but people often are!

• Here are some famous insults that history has recorded.

Ill:

Famous insults Quiz – Who Said:

• Which comedian said: “I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception.”

• Choices: Groucho Marx – Billy Connolly - Bob Monkhouse

• Answer: Groucho Marx

• Which actress said: “Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.”

• Choices: Mae West – Margret Thatcher Marilyn Monroe

• Answer: Marilyn Monroe

• Which talk-show host said:

• “I don't approve of political jokes; I have seen too many of them get elected.”

• Choices: Larry King – Jon Stewart - David Letterman

• Answer: Jon Stewart

• Which wit said:

• “I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”

• Choices: Oscar Wilde – Alan Bennett - Mark Twain

• Answer: Mark Twain

• Which wit said: “He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends”

• Choices: Oscar Wilde – Alan Bennett - Mark Twain

• Answer: Oscar Wilde

My favourite insults or comebacks are credited to Winston Churchill:

(a).

• Lady Astor the first woman to sit as a Member of Parliament (Conservative);

• To sit in the House of Commons.

• On one occasion she said: "Winston, you're drunk!"

• Winston Churchill replied:

• "Madam you are ugly but in the morning I shall be sober!"

(b).

• Bessie Braddock was a British Labour politician. Nicknamed 'Battling Bessie':

• She once said to Churchill:

• "Mr. Churchill, if you were my husband, I'd put poison in your tea."

• Winston Churchill replied:

• "Madam, if I were your husband, I'd drink it."

• TRANSITION: Now love might not be rude, but people often are!

• I would imagine almost every day someone is rude to us;

• Or maybe we are rude to someone else!

(1). Love is not rude.

(a). Definition of rudeness:

(A). RUDE BEHAVIOUR.

• Why is it rude to pick your nose in public?

• Why is it rude to chomp and slurp your food at the dinner table?

• Why is it rude to break wind loudly in Church?

• More seriously why is it rude to push in at queues?

• Why is it rude to drive aggressive or tailgating other motorists?

(B). RUDE LANGUAGE.

• Why is it rude to use the word ‘Hun’ to a German, or ‘Jap’ to a Japanese person?

• Why is it rude to use foul language in front of other people especially children & seniors?

(C).RUDE ATTITUDE.

• Why is it rude to deliberately ignore a legitimate and polite greeting?

• Why is it rude to or question to communicate disregard for the other person?

(D). RUDE ATTIRE.

• Why is it rude to failure to dress appropriately for an occasion?

• i.e. whether by dressing too informally, too formally,

• i.e. Immodestly or inappropriately.

Quote: CS Lewis writes that:

"A girl in the Pacific islands wearing hardly any clothes and a Victorian lady completely covered in clothes might both be equally 'modest,' proper, or decent, according to the standards of their own societies" - but that in each culture, the idea of immodest, improper, and indecent dress existed, and that violating the culture's standard was rude.

Now I would suggest all those examples are things that are rude:

• Rude behaviour.

• Rude language.

• Rude attitude.

• Rude attire.

Question: But why are they rude?

Answer:

• At first glance these things don't seem to be connected, but they are!

• What they have in common is this:

• They don't care about the feelings of other people.

• Rudeness is not about breaking silly, fussy man-made rules!

• It's about breaking the second most important rule God ever gave us.

• Question: And what's that?

• Answer: The Second Commandment.

(b). Solution to rudeness:

Ill:

• In Matthew chapter 22 verses 34–36;

• Jesus was asked a question by a Pharisee, “an expert in the law”

• Which is the greatest commandment.

• Jesus answered the religious leader by saying:

• (Matthew chapter 22 verses 37-40)

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest and most important commandment. The second is like it: Love your neighbour as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets depend on these two commandments”.

• Don’t miss that little expression: “Love your neighbour as yourself”

• It has a twin verse also found in Matthew’s gospel (chapter 7 verse 12):

• “"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".

• A verse commonly known as "The Golden Rule,"

• In summary rudeness is treating other people;

• In a way we do not want other people to treat us!

Ill:

• Maybe you nose itches terribly, but other people don't want to see you pick it!

• So wipe it, blow it even pick it discreetly.

• Maybe you like to eat soup with a straw at home but it grosses out other people!

• So in a public place use a spoon!

• Maybe you have a lovely singing voice,

• But when in a train carriage others don't want you to sing out loud!

• If you don't want others to gawk and point at you,

• Then don't gawk and point at them.

• It's as simple as that. Good manners are nothing but keeping the Golden Rule.

• Rudeness is nothing but breaking it:

• "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you".

• To summarise: “Love is not rude”

• Because love cares about the feelings of other people.

• While being rudeness shows publicly that you only care about your own feelings.

(2). Love is not self-seeking.

• NIV: “Love is not self-seeking”

• KJV: “Love…seeketh not her own”

• ESV: “Love…does not insist on its own way”

• Anybody who wants to express true, biblical love;

• Will not insist on getting their own way or demanding their own rights.

• Rather, those who genuinely love;

• Neither take any thought for themselves nor pursue their own interests.

• They are unselfish.

• Now in a culture that is overrun with a sense of entitlement and egocentrism,

• This is a critical lesson that needs to be learned.

• I would suggest we would solve nearly all the problems we encounter in Church life;

• If as Christians we lived with this attitude!

• The trouble is of course none of us do!

• This problem of ‘self-seeking’ or ‘getting things done my way’ is not a new one;

• In fact 2,000 years ago the apostle Paul wrote to a Church in Philippi;

• Explaining to them this exact problem.

Turn with me in your Bibles to: Philippians chapter 2 verses 1-30:

• The Apostle Paul knew the Church at Philippi had problems:

• He also knew that these problems would not be solved by rules or threats:

• These problems would only get solved;

• When these Christians get their hearts and minds right with Christ.

• So in this chapter he gives them four examples, four models to emulate.

• FIRST: Jesus (verses 1-11,

• SECOND: The apostle Paul himself (verses 12-18),

• THIRD: Timothy (verses 19-24)

• The apostle Paul’s companion and co-worker, trusted Pastor of a number of Churches.

• FOURTH: Epaphroditus (verses 25-30).

• Paul calls him his; “brother, co-worker and fellow soldier”

• Now these four examples are given;

• To help these Christians get their hearts and minds right with Christ & each other!

• They are examples of theology in flesh!

• Four people who lived out the principle that ‘love is not self-seeking’

• Now before the examples there are some principles the apostle wants them to note;

• Verses 1-4 contain the theology and verses 5-30 contain the examples.

Definition of self-seeking:

(1). Unity and Union (vs 1).

• This section with four rhetorical questions:

• “If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ”

• “If any loving comfort”

• “If any fellowship with the Spirit”

• “If any tenderness and compassion”

They are rhetorical questions because the answer is obvious;

• In fact it is probably better and wiser to translate the word “if” as “since”.

• Because every Christian has been encouraged by being joined with Christ,

• Every Christian has been comforted by his love.

• Every Christian enjoys the enabling and the fellowship with the Holy Spirit.

• Every Christian has experienced tenderness and compassion,

• All this is true ‘since’ or because they belong to Jesus Christ!

The key words in verse 1 are “with Christ” (or “in the Lord”, or “in him”, etc.)

• This phrase is used over 170 times in the New Testament.

• Our salvation is totally dependent on our relationship with Jesus Christ.

Ill:

• A little boy fell out of the bed in his sleep.

• His father picked him up and put him back in bed.

• He asked him, "Son, what happened?"

• The little boy responded, "I fell asleep too close to where I got in."

• TRANSITION:

• I believe that describes too many Christians today;

• They have fallen asleep too close to where they got in.

• They are saved and they are not in danger of falling out of salvation;

• But they have made no spiritual progress since they were saved.

• They are still at primary level when they should be at university by now!

Note:

• The apostle Paul makes a clear connection between unity and union in Christ,

• With the unity we have in Jesus goes ‘hand in glove’ with our union with other believers.

• It is not an optional extra - it is an essential that we must all strive for!

(2). Opinions and Attitudes (vs 2)

Ill:

• Two shoe salesmen arrived on a tropical island.

• The first one looked around and saw that the natives wore no shoes.

• He thought to himself, "Why'd they send me here? There's no market for shoes here!"

• The second one looked around and saw that the natives wore no shoes, and thought,

• "Wow! Everybody needs shoes - and the whole market is mine."

Quote: Martin P. Simon, Your Child and You

“Attitudes are taught. Attitudes are caught.

Attitudes are better taught if caught, and better caught if taught.”

Now in view of the tremendous blessings that these Christians have received in Christ:

• The apostle Paul urges them to be united in harmony.

• Notice Paul calls for this unity in four ways:

• He wants the Philippians:

• (1st) to have the same mind (or the same thinking),

• (2nd) to have the same love,

• (3rd) to be joined together in spirit,

• (4th) to be of one mind.

• The apostle Paul wants these Philippian Christians;

• To think the same way and have the same mind;

• That is, to have similar attitudes, concerns and intentions.

Ill:

• On the day before the Battle of Trafalgar,

• Lord Nelson was aware that two of his captains;

• Were constantly arguing and at variance with each other;

• So he called them to a meeting on the deck of the ship;

• They stood where they could see the fleet that opposed them.

• "Yonder," said the Admiral with a sweep of his hand, "are your enemies."

• The two captains shook hands and put aside their differences;

• In the face of their common enemy.

• The apostle Paul asks these believers to make his joy full and complete.

• By being like-minded, working on being harmonious and united together.

(3). Myself and Others (vs 3-4)

Ill:

• Many years ago, William Booth, the Founder of The Salvation Army,

• Was preparing to send his annual Christmas message to Salvationists around the world.

• In those days, communication was by telegraph,

• (a method of communication that was long before texting, email or Facebook!)

• Communication was by telegraph,

• And you paid for each word that you sent.

• Times were tough and the Army was short on money,

• So William Booth sent a one-word telegram. The word he sent was: ‘OTHERS’.

These verses (1-5) could be summed up with one word: “Others”:

• Selfishness and its relatives: envy, jealousy and contentiousness, conceit;

• Pride and arrogance, have no place in any Christian’s personality.

• Selfishness and self-centredness are the antithesis of genuine Christianity.

• To follow Jesus Christ means to “die to self”.

• Please note that “dying to self” is not necessarily grim.

• Because “Dying to self” means living for God and his will;

• Which can often be joyful, very satisfying and very rewarding!

• Part of our journey towards spiritual maturity;

• Is that we continue to live for God and for other people,

• Instead of following other, ultimately empty and meaningless ambitions.

Notice in these verses the apostle Paul lets us know who are the Christians living for God:

• They live like Jesus:

• Verse 3: They “Regard one another as more important [or better] than yourselves”

• Verse 4: They “Do not merely look out for your own personal interests,

• But also the interests of others.”

Tough Question:

• Is the apostle Paul describing you in these verses?

• Or someone else?

• If we are serious about the Christian life;

• Than we have to aim to be the one described in these verses;

• Because this is the normal Christian life!

Solution to self-seeking:

Ill:

• To help these Philippian Christians be real;

• Paul reminds them of Jesus Christ as his prototype.

• Now these verses are a preachers, a theologians dream;

• They tell us so much concerning the unique person of Jesus.

(a).

• They talk about his deity (verse 6):

• He was and is God. The supreme being. The Almighty. Creator of heaven & earth!

(b).

• They talk about his incarnation (verse 7):

• He became a human being and lived among us.

(c).

• They talk about his death, a shameful, disgraceful death on a cross (verse 8);

• (ill: He died like the lowest of the low).

(d).

• Then they talk about his exaltation;

• How he was ‘raised, ascended and now reigns in the heavens’ (verse 9);

• ill: Grand Prix champion, ‘On the winning podium’.

(e).

• They talk about his kingship (verses 10-11)

• ‘Every knee will one day bow and acknowledge him’!

• We do that voluntarily now or one day we will be summoned to stand before King Jesus!

Ill:

• An American guide in Arizona was asked;

• ‘How long does it take to see the Grand Canyon?’

• The guide replied;

• ‘Some see it in five minutes others want to stay for days or weeks’.

• Likewise we could spend weeks, months, years or even a life-time;

• Looking at these great doctrines.

• But please remember these verses 5-11 were not written to defend the deity of Christ.

• They were not given to help us appreciate Christ at the ‘Breaking of Bread’ service.

• They were primarily given as an example;

• That Jesus was not self-seeking!

• He was the opposite he always put others before himself.

• So the apostle Paul’s punchline is verse is number 2:

• Where he says “be like minded”.

• Paul tells the Philippians ‘Look and learn’.

• Look at Jesus and “be like minded”.

• If you are linked to Christ (i.e. a Christian) in anyway prove it!

• Verse 2: tells us how we prove it; not by quoting ‘the four spiritual laws’;

• But rather; “By being like-minded”

• In other words; ‘Have the same attitude’

• In other words; ‘Have the same mindset’

• In other words; ‘Have the same outlook’

• In other words; ‘Have the same desire’

Because:

• NIV: “Love is not self-seeking”

• KJV: “Love…seeketh not her own”

• ESV: “Love…does not insist on its own way”

Sermon Audio link:

https://surf.pxwave.com/wl/?id=Wrj2ZxqLvP6Q5cBhf2ZxdLqGELzVoBJD