Offense: Living In The Woe
Matthew 18:7 (NKJV)
Woe to the world because of offenses! For offenses must come, but woe to that man by whom the offense comes!
I want to talk to you today from a sermon titled,
Offense: Living In The Woe.
I want to talk to you about something that the Lord has been dealing with my heart for a while. This is something that has a great potential of robbing us from the Thanksgiving life that we are not only promised but that we deserve. I want to talk to you today about…offense.
In this scripture found in Matthew 18, Jesus is warning about the offense. He is saying that offense not only WILL come but that offense MUST come. Christ is teaching us as mature believers that it’s not the question of IF, but a question of WHEN. So it’s how you respond to the WHEN of offense. Jesus said, offense will and must come…but WOE until them that the offense comes.
Woe is a word we rarely use anymore. Woe is an old English word that means:
Misery, sorrow, distress, wretchedness, sadness, unhappiness, heartache, heartbreak, despondency, despair, depression,
regret, gloom, melancholy.
So whereas we may not use the word “woe” to describe a place that we may be in, we are very familiar with it’s meaning.
We are all too familiar with the result of the woe, but we often avoid the cause of the woe. There are people today that you have been in a state of woe.
• Sadness
• Despair
• Depression
• Gloom
• Heartache
• Heartbreak
And the “woe”, could be caused because of an offense. And I believe God is here today to remove the spirit of woe that you’re living in and God is here to remove any offense that is living inside of your heart.
DISCLAIMER: I want to offer this disclaimer about this sermon. Don’t think it strange that as we delve into this that people will come in your mind. When that happens, I want you to acknowledge that that is the Holy Spirit and not I. I’m not that good. But the Holy Spirit is. Give Him credit that He is working in our midst this morning.
The word offense means….
A violation or breach of a law, custom, rule, etc. / a lack of politeness; a failure to show regard for others; wounding the feelings or others
Offense is something that we are all susceptible to. I have had my moments where I’ve been offended by something or someone. And there’s a chance that I’ve caused someone to be offended. But what I know about offense is this: The damage of offense doesn’t necessarily fall on the one who CAUSED the offense but on the one CARRYING the offense. Jesus was clear in this text that “woe” of offense comes on the one harboring or keeping the offense.
Offense is tricky. Because you pretty much can function in your life and no one may never know that you are carrying an offense. But while everything looks good on the outside, the offense is polluting your spirit.
Offense is like a spiritual hangnail. It doesn’t cripple you and can easily be ignored until it becomes infected. Then not only is it painful, it’s toxic.
Facts about Offense:
1. Offense is always personal.
a. Only those who you care about can hurt you. Offense never happens with someone you wouldn’t walk across the street to help with anything.
2. Offense is prevalent in families.
a. Offense is often exposed and spills over during holidays. The days that are meant for rest and connection will take a vicious turn all from an offense that as been living in the heart of someone in the family.
b. How many people have cut short visits with family members because of an offense? Maybe not from you offended but caught in the cross hairs of a family offense.
c. Offense is common in families, when losing a loved one to death. (Who gets mama’s ring? Or who gets daddy’s favorite gun?)
3. Offense is prevalent in CHURCH families.
a. People leave churches because of offense. Offense with the pastors, the ministry leaders, or the one they sit in the pew with. So they leave saying “God told me” while offended and they began searching for something that isn’t out there because they made a life altering decision because of….offense. Leaving a church should always be a life altering decision and cannot be based on offense.
4. Offense will keep you up at night.
a. There is no pain reliever or sleep aid that will remove an offense.
5. Offense is hard to let go of.
a. Proverbs 18:19 “A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city.”
b. An offense will distract you.
c. When it takes hold of you. It won’t let go easy. But good news today…offense is going to let go of someone today! Offense has a root.
d. Offense never just pops up. It usually grows from a place that rooted from something else.
e. We produce the fruits of offense often from:
i. Hurt
ii. Anger
iii. Jealousy
iv. Envy
v. Resentment,
vi. Bitterness
vii. Hatred
f. Out of those things offense can easily grow.
6. Offense interrupts our God thinking.
a. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ
b. “Imaginations” are thought processes we develop deep within our souls to protect ourselves.
c. Offense alters our mind and our reasoning.
d. Offense takes away our vulnerability in God. God wants us vulnerable!! When we are vulnerable with God, it confirms our complete trust in Him.
e. Offense causes us to go into survival mode where we will protect our self at all cost.
• “Ain’t no man gonna hurt me like that again!!”
• “My Father wasn’t there from me then, why in the world would I let him be there for me now??”
• We build walls of protection. Problem is, God is often on the outside of those walls. He wants us vulnerable.
7. Offense is Satan’s most effective tactic to keep you from what God has promised you.
a. The spirit of offense has been working to keep people down for years and years. John Bevere wrote a book years back called The Bait of Satan. And in that book he describes how offense is the very bait that Satan uses to trap us. Offense is the one trap, that when it traps us, it has the potential of trapping us for a long time.
I’m not much of a hunter. But if I were and wanted to use a trap to capture my prey….there are two things a trap needs to be successful:
• A trap needs to be hidden. (To enable the animal to stumble into it)
• A trap needs bait. (To lure the animal into its destructive jaws)
Offense is the hidden trap and the irresistible bait that Satan uses to pull God’s people into captivity.
8. Offense is a choice.
a. Even though offense is often driven in the spiritual realm, you can make a choice to be free from offense.
b. Proverbs 19:11 says, If you are sensible, you will control your temper. When someone wrongs you, it is a great virtue to ignore it.
c. Through the pain of offense, you can be free by making the choice to be free.
**TRANSITION**
To help you with that choice I want to give you a few things to STOP doing and to START doing TODAY!!
What To Stop Doing
1. Stop justifying it
a. Working hard to prove to anyone that will listen that you were done wrong.
b. Offense is obvious when you constantly want to justify it to anyone who will listen.
c. When you are in Christ, you don’t have to justify yourself any longer. We have justification through Christ.
d. Romans 4:23-25 says, “Now it was not written for Abraham’s sake alone that it was imputed to him, but for us also, to whom it shall be imputed if we believe in Him that raised up Jesus our Lord from the dead, who was delivered for our offenses, and was raised again for our justification.
e. When you continually justify the offense, you are saying that the price Jesus paid for you…His justification on the Cross… isn’t good enough
f. Stop speaking your mind!! Stop speaking your peace!! We no longer have to speak our peace when we know the peace speaker. Until we stop speaking our peace the peace speaker cannot speak HIS peace! Christ wants to speak peace over your mind that wants to continually justify your offense.
Stop justifying it…
2. Stop rehearsing it
a. Stop going over it, over and over! Stop re-living it!
b. Stop rehearsing what you should have said to them while you had the chance
c. It’s time to tear up the script of what that person did to you and step off your stage of offense and quit rehearsing what that person did to you. You have gone over your lines enough. Stop!
d. Stop rehearsing what your going to say to them next time you see them. Stop! Because, there isn’t going to be a next time. God is here today to set you free from this offense that has ruled your heart.
Stop justifying it, stop rehearsing it and lastly…
3. Stop discussing it
a. With Others
i. Offense will never ever go away if you feel comfortable discussing it all the time. And if whom you are discussing it with isn’t speaking LIFE and DIRECTION to you, you are discussing with the wrong person.
b. With God
i. I know, you think I’ve lost my mind!! Pastor Kelly is telling us not to talk to God about our problems!! Blasphemer! ☺
ii. Yes, talk to God. Then leave it with Him! (Old Hymn: Leave it There)
iii. The bible says to cast your cares on Him because He cares for you. (fishing rod example)
iv. Sometimes it isn’t HOW MUCH you say to God, but WHAT you say to God.
v. Ecclesiastes 5:2,3 says, Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God. God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few.
vi. Try this prayer instead…Pray…God remove anything out of my heart that isn’t pleasing to You.
What To Start Doing
Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;”
1. Love them
2. Bless them
3. Do good to them.
a. Romans 12:20-21, Rather, if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in doing this you will be heaping burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
b. Hot coals are a metaphor that seems to symbolize God’s smoldering, hot justice. You are bringing justice, without demanding justice. “That’s killing them with kindness!” NO!
c. Bring the one that offended you a gift. When you give a gift to someone that has offended you, you are surprising and confusing the enemy. And loosing the hold of offense.
4. Pray for them.
Closing
Do you realize how many people live with the regret everyday that someone is in his/her grave today and an offense was never worked out?
Rene Descartes (deh-KART) a French Philosopher has a quote that says…
Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach it.
I’m praying that today your soul will be raised to such a level that offense no longer matters.
It’s time…to …let it go.
Altar Call
