The Paradox of Pain
TCF Sermon
October 13, 2013
There is a Calvin and Hobbes comic strip that sums up what life often feels like, and I think even for us as a fellowship, it describes at least part of our experiences in the past few years.
It’s a series of panels, each depicting a scene from a single day. First, Calvin sits on a wad of bubble gum. Next, his teacher catches him glancing at his classmate’s paper. Then a bully knocks him down in the hallway. The water fountain sprays in his face. The bug he’d brought in for show-and-tell escapes. He gets picked last at recess. There’s a hair in his lunch, and when he heads to the swing set, all the seats are occupied.
Finally, he misses the bus and has to walk home in the rain. In his bedroom that evening, Calvin looks at his trusted tiger and says, “You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don’t help.”
Well, I don’t have, we don’t have, lucky rocketship underpants. But, as followers of Christ, we do have a merciful and gracious God, who loves us, and knows our weaknesses and our frailty.
Yet, we have to be honest and admit we’re in a paradoxical season in the life of this church, having the kind of season in life that Calvin had in a day, with a lot of things just not going right.
On the one hand, we’re seeing some growth, with God bringing to us wonderful new individuals and families. It’s what we’ve been praying for about three years now, and God is showing Himself faithful to respond to those prayers.
God continues to use this church to send laborers to the distant harvest fields, and God is using us to minister in many ways to our community.
Yet, we’re also in a very difficult season, with so many individuals facing illnesses, disease, or emotionally challenging personal and family issues.
I spent a few minutes this past week looking over each week’s intercessory prayer list back to the beginning of 2013. What a year we’ve had this year! Let me remind you of just a few things that showed up on the top of our prayer list that we publish each week:
Sarah Joy, ongoing neck issues, colitis
Mary Lu , recovery from paralysis
Dan , back issues in the midst of caring for Mary Lu, and then his sister died
Tom B, hospitalized
Vicki B, diagnosis of cancer, two surgeries
Spencer T, hospitalized with severe headaches and a life threatening blood vessel problem in his brain
Debbie, concussion and injuries from serious bicycle accident
Margot, broken rib in the same accident
Rebecca W, heart attack, stents
Ginger and Rebecca in a car wreck
Tom and Jody’s grandson Michael
Gordon, heart attack and stent procedures
Ben O, wife Shirley died suddenly and unexpectedly
Abby F, broke her arm
Pat G, ongoing health issues, recent hospitalization for septicemia
Daniel L, emergency appendectomy
Laura G, series of mini-strokes
Darlene G, hospitalization for seizure
Jerry D, spider bite
This is only some of what’s been at the top of our intercessory prayer list in 2013, and these include only things that required some sort of hospital visit. It doesn’t include most of the extended family issues we pray about together. It doesn’t include many of the emotionally painful things our TCF families deal with, including prodigal kids, unsaved loved ones, dysfunctional families, broken relationships. It doesn’t include everyday illnesses, many chronic illnesses, deaths in extended families, aging parents, etc. And it doesn’t extend into last year, and it doesn’t include all of the ongoing physical and emotional struggles that our brothers and sisters in Christ here face every day.
Some of them we know about and have been praying about for some time. Many of them we do not know about, or only a select few know. So, in the midst of this wonderful and encouraging season of growth and ministry, we’re also seeing this suffering and pain among the body as well.
We cry out to the Lord for healing, for relief from these problems and we see God move in response to many of these prayers, but it’s a paradox, isn’t it? Because it seems that some of these prayers go unanswered – let’s be honest with each other, and with God, and recognize the reality is that we pray for things that don’t always seem to turn out the way we want, the way we think would be good or best.
A paradox is a statement that might seem to contradict itself, but which might be true. We see a lot of paradoxes in scripture, statements which are absolutely true, but seem to be contradictory. Fully God and fully man, when speaking of Jesus. The things that are already, but not yet, with many things related to God’s Kingdom.
We have to wrestle with the outworking, of the practical realities of these paradoxes, in our everyday lives.
One paradox we all face - and if we haven’t yet, we can be assured that we will - is the paradox of pain.
On the one hand, we see in scripture that pain and suffering has a purpose. Pain produces some things in the life of a believer.
Romans 5:3-5 (ESV) 3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Isn’t that a tough passage to swallow? Not so much that suffering and pain can produce Godly qualities in us, such as endurance and character and hope…that’s hard enough….but that because of this we can rejoice in our sufferings, precisely because of what they bring about in us.
Rejoicing is not something we typically think of when suffering. Then, we see the model of Jesus Himself, who endured pain and suffering for a specific purpose. He knew that His pain would accomplish something vital, and would gain something for Him.
Hebrews 12:1-2 (ESV) 1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.
Pain is clearly implied here. We know that the cross was painful. So when we run our race, here we are encouraged to endure. We’re not encouraged to endure because it’s easy, or fun. We’re encouraged to endure, because you endure difficult things. Nobody ever describes a great meal or a great vacation by using the word enduring.
But there’s a purpose and a plan, as there was for Jesus. The challenge for us is that we don’t always see that purpose and plan. So we’re left with something that’s incredibly hard for us when we’re in pain, whether it be emotional pain, or physical pain, or both, depending on our individual circumstances. We’re left with choosing what to believe.
We can believe that pain and suffering are purposeless, and totally random. Or we can believe that God’s in charge, and even when we don’t understand, even when we can’t begin to see what His purpose is in a given set of painful circumstances, we can believe that because God is good, because He is holy, because he is just, that He will use these things for our good and for His glory.
Now, this isn’t just a pie in the sky wishful thinking kind of thing. If it is that, it will not sustain us in the midst of pain. What do we really believe when we say we are in Christ? Clearly, it cannot mean we do not suffer any kind of physical or emotional pain. To believe that, we’d also have to believe that we’re somehow better than the saints who have gone before us. We’d have to believe that because we’re somehow better than the apostles, or the early church, we’re somehow immune from the suffering as they did. To believe we’re totally protected in this life from pain means we have to ignore whole sections of scripture.
So we can’t go there, can we? But we still struggle with pain, or even the prospect of it, don’t we? Even knowing that pain has a purpose, that pain produces good things in the life of the believer, that pain is one of the instruments God uses to mold us and shape us into the image and likeness of Christ, who was, after all, our model of endurance, we still avoid pain like the plague.
And even at this point we find a paradox. We’re told to pray for one another for healing, for relief. Yet, sometimes that relief does not come.
Pain is a truly powerful influence in life. Pain can make you do or say things you don’t want to say, even things you don’t believe.
Think of it. Why is torture often an effective instrument to get people to say or do something? Because our natural tendency is to avoid pain. Only a sadist enjoys pain.
Yet, we see the apostle Paul telling us that we are to rejoice in our sufferings. What a paradox! We see the apostles arrested and beaten for spreading the gospel.
Acts 5:40-42 (ESV) 40 and when they had called in the apostles, they beat them and charged them not to speak in the name of Jesus, and let them go. 41 Then they left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the name. 42 And every day, in the temple and from house to house, they did not cease teaching and preaching that the Christ is Jesus.
Well, we might be inclined to think, that’s suffering for the gospel. How is Sarah Joy’s ongoing pain, how are Laura Grinnell’s mini-strokes, suffering for the sake of the gospel?
In the Romans 5 passage we read a moment ago, let’s be sure to note that it does not say “suffering for the gospel, or persecution” produces the list of things it says suffering produces. It doesn’t distinguish suffering for the sake of the gospel with suffering in general.
So the idea that we can rejoice in our sufferings because of the things that suffering can produce in the life of the believer is for all believers, regardless of the reason for their suffering. Yet, it remains a paradox for us.
Pain is not powerless in our lives. Pain can change us – and it can produce in us God’s character. Yet pain also has power to change other things about our lives.
Spencer and Sarah Joy are faithful servants in this body. But their infirmities have caused them to miss some opportunities to serve. Mary Lu has one of the most fruitful and effective ministries of any of our missionaries. If you hear the stories of the hundreds and even thousands being discipled in part because of the way God uses her and Dan, you’d be amazed, and grateful to God for it.
Yet, the pain of her illness in the past 18 months has caused her to lay some things down, and miss a season of ministry. That’s why pain is such a paradox. Why, we might ask God, would you allow such a faithful, fruitful, effective servant, to be sidelined, even for a season?
We can be honest, and say we just simply don’t always understand. We can be biblically realistic, and note that God just does things differently than we do, but because He’s God and we’re not. We can know that His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and that means there are many things this side of eternity we cannot understand.
So where does that leave the faithful believer in Christ? It leaves us in the same place it always leaves us at the end of our questions. It leaves us in the same place Job was after he suffered things most of us can only imagine.
It leaves us not with answers, but with God’s consistent word to us. Trust Me. Trust Me. I’m God, you’re not. I know best, you don’t. Trust Me.
But can we also admit how hard that can be? It was hard for Job, a man God commended in the heavenlies as a
Job 1:8 a blameless and upright man, who fears God and turns away from evil
Then, Job had the kind of season in his life where even his lucky rocketship underpants didn’t seem to help. This was followed by the weak comfort of his friends, who looked for reasons why his suffering was Job’s fault. They tried to explain the unexplainable, and did a miserable job.
And God’s answer at the end of it all was basically, Job, you and your friends don’t have a clue. I’m God and you’re not.
This is just the beginning of God’s answer:
Job 38:1-4 (ESV) 1 Then the LORD answered Job out of the whirlwind and said:
2 “Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge? 3 Dress for action like a man; I will question you, and you make it known to me. 4 “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me, if you have understanding.
Tell me, if you have understanding. Isn’t that the gist of this paradox of pain? Not just for Job, but for us? We don’t have understanding. God took four chapters in the book of Job to say that to him. And in the end, Job realized that he really didn’t understand as much as he may have thought.
Job 42:1-3 (ESV) 1 Then Job answered the LORD and said: 2 “I know that you can do all things, and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted. 3 ‘Who is this that hides counsel without knowledge?’ Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.
So, we cannot explain the paradox, and though I do believe it’s OK, and even important to wrestle with these things, because they’re matters of faith, it’s also important for us to remember that when we try to explain things, we are often treading into areas we simply cannot understand.
The main question in the book of Job is timely: Why do believers experience troubles and suffering? Through a long debate, Job's supposedly wise friends were unable to answer this question. Job's friends made a serious error for which God rebuked them. They assumed that trouble comes only because people sin. People make the same mistake today when they assert that sickness or lack of material blessing is a sign of unconfessed sin or lack of faith. Though normally (but not always) following God leads to a happier life, and rebelling against God normally (but not always) leads to an unhappy life, God is in control. In our world invaded by sin, calamity and suffering come to good and bad alike. This does not mean that God is indifferent, uncaring, unjust, or powerless to protect us. Bad things happen because we live in a fallen world, where both believers and unbelievers are hit with the tragic consequences of sin. God allows evil for a time although he turns it around for our good (Romans 8:28). We may have no answers as to why God allows evil, but we can be sure he is all-powerful and knows what he is doing. Make God your foundation. You can never be separated from his love. Life Application Study Bible.
So, the key to the story of Job is also the key to this paradox of pain for us. God wants us to trust Him. He wants to be our firm foundation. To trust that even in the midst of pain, we can never be separated from His love.
Explanations are a substitute for trust. God’s interested not in explaining Himself - He’s interested in our faith in Him.
Nothing is quite like suffering, in its ability to remind us how little control we actually have, over anything. We have so little power – which is why we need an all-powerful God.
The gospel of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ allows us the freedom to be honest about our pain. It gives us the confidence that our ability to copy with, or do away with suffering, is not the point. The point God’s making is Trust Me.
Though we’ve recognized the power than pain can have in our lives, there are also things that scripture tells us pain cannot do.
In April 1994, Willard Hudson, one of the founding members of this church, was by then an elder emeritus. He had just been diagnosed with the cancer that would take his life about a year later. That day, he preached a message called What Cancer Cannot Do. I want to remember a few points from that message today, by highlighting just a few of the things that Willard said then in light of our look at the Paradox of Pain.
Because while pain, or cancer, can do some things, there are other things pain cannot do. One of the things most people remember about Willard is that he had a great sense of humor. He proved it that day by joking about what most of us were in tears about.
He said, “for those of you who are wondering about this certain radiance about me, it’s not because of a spiritual encounter. It’s because I’ve had two weeks of radiation treatment. The glow is of the world. But it beats the chemotherapy because you lose your hair, and I wanted to keep my sideburns.”
Now, those of us who remember Willard don’t remember much hair on his head to begin with. In saying this, Willard gave us permission to maintain our sense of humor.
Willard noted, among other things, that cancer, or for our purposes this morning, pain, cannot:
cripple love, it cannot shatter hope; it can’t corrode faith; It can’t destroy confidence; It cannot kill friendship; it can’t shut out memories; it cannot silence courage; it cannot invade the soul; It can’t reduce eternal life; It cannot quench the spirit; and finally, it cannot lessen the power of the resurrection.
One of the things Willard said that day is that cancer cannot cripple love. Willard spoke of loving Nette more than ever....the love will be there whether she gets sick or not. At that point, they’d been married 52 years.
He said, “when we stood before a preacher 52 years ago, we made a commitment.... the love endures... some people run off and leave when one of their mates gets sick.”
I have to note that I’ve seen the reality of a committed love a lot this past year. I’ve been at the hospital with Gordon and Sue when Gordon had a heart attack. I was at the hospital after Debbie’s bike accident, and James was at her side. I’ve been with Paul as he awaited the results of Vicki’s surgery.
I’ve seen that the pain and suffering of these believers could not cripple the love that God has forged in these marriages over many years. And that remains true especially after the initial crisis, and that’s when the hard work really begins.
That’s when love sustains these families. I think of the months of caretaking Dan Coventon had with Mary Lu. To see this couple together now, Mary Lu doing better, but still with challenges ahead, proclaiming God’s goodness and faithfulness, I’m truly inspired.
To hear Vicki Burgard say that her life is in God’s hands, and that one of her primary concerns is for her children to know that, despite her suffering, God is good, I’m truly inspired.
These are people of faith. These are people who trust God, even when they don’t understand. We have right in our midst, Godly examples of what we’re talking about today.
The love we have for each other isn’t the only thing that pain cannot truly cripple. The most critical and vital thing that cannot be changed, that pain cannot do, is cripple the love of God for us.
In our pain, in our suffering, God doesn’t promise to explain Himself. He hears and responds to our prayers, but He doesn’t promise to answer them in the way we might think He should. He doesn’t even promise to relieve our pain in this life, even though in His mercy He often does.
What He promises us is Himself. He promises to be with us always. He promises to never leave us. And when you think about it, what would you rather have? Would you rather go through all these kinds of things with the presence of God being very real in your life, or would you rather not go through pain and suffering, but have God be absent?
When God says trust Me, I believe He desires the kind of faith we’ve heard of before from this pulpit. We want to have a “but if not” kind of faith. It’s the kind of faith that recognizes what God is able to do, and isn’t afraid to ask Him for it, as long as it’s clear that what we’re asking Him is still within the realm of God’s will,
but also recognizes that if, for reasons only God truly understands, He chooses not to do precisely what we ask Him to do, We….Will… Trust… Him. We will serve Him.
Daniel 3:15-18 (ESV) But if you do not worship, you shall immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. And who is the god who will deliver you out of my hands?”
16 Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego answered and said to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. 17 If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king. 18 But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.”
Some of us are really suffering here today. You need to know that God is not punishing you. Billy Graham’s grandson Tullian Tchividjian writes:
You don’t have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and find a way to conquer the odds, be stronger, or transform yourself into some better version of yourself. The pain you feel (whatever the degree) may be a reminder that things are not as they should be, in which case it is appropriate to mourn the gravity of that brokenness.
The gospel is not ultimately a defense from pain and suffering; rather, it is the message of God’s rescue through pain. In fact, it allows us to drop our defenses, to escape not from pain but from the prison of How and Why to the freedom of Who. We are not responsible for finding the right formula to combat or unlock our suffering. The good news of the gospel does not consist of theological assertions or some elaborate religious how-to manual. The good news is Jesus Himself, the Man of Sorrows, the crucified God who meets us in our grief. When you are at the end of your rope— when you no longer have hope within yourself— that is when you run to God for mercy.
We don’t need answers as much as we need God’s presence in and through the suffering itself. For the life of the believer, one thing is beautifully and abundantly true: God’s chief concern in your suffering is to be with you and be Himself for you. Thankfully, the good news of the gospel is not an exhortation from above to “hang on at all costs,” or “grin and bear it” in the midst of hardship. No, the good news is that God is hanging on to you,
Many of you know of the Christian singer and songwriter Stephen Curtis Chapman. In 2008, his four year old adopted daughter died in a tragic accident, when her older brother backed a vehicle out of their driveway and ran over her and killed her.
For most of us this is unimaginable pain. Yet, there are some even here who have experienced the painful loss of a child.
But, what is God’s word to us in any kind of pain we experience? Trust Me.
In the unexpected death of a loved one, regardless of the circumstances, God says trust Me.
In the chronic illness, that seems to plague us for days, months, for some of us, for years, God says Trust Me.
In the life-threatening disease, when we wonder if we’ll live to see next year, God says Trust Me.
In the emotional pain of a prodigal child, who seems to have walked away from a parents’ Christian upbringing, or the similar pain of any family member who has never trusted in Christ, God says Trust Me.
In the pain of a loved one who’s gone off the deep end and is in deep trouble as a result, God says Trust Me.
In the more everyday aches and pains, colds and flus, God says trust Me.
In the more everyday challenges like a tough exam coming up, or a romance gone wrong, or a broken relationship, God says trust Me.
Whatever you’re facing this morning, or will face in the future, God says Trust Me.
We’re going to close with a song that Stephen Curtis Chapman wrote sometime following the death of his daughter.
In this song, you can hear the very real, very honest recognition of pain, but you can also hear loudly and clearly the “but if not” kind of faith – the paradox of pain, we’ve looked at this morning.
Respond as God would have you do this morning – stand, kneel, come to the altar, or just pray quietly as the song plays, but listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit and let this song minister to you as we close. Pray
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