Well… I just wanna welcome everyone here to Embrace… at all 5 of our campuses.
My name is Adam…
and I’m one of the pastors here…
And as always… we are thrilled that you are here…
And today… it is obviously Valentine’s Day right?
Which is an exciting day for some of us…
And for others of us… it’s maybe kinda stressful…
Like where exactly… are we… in this dating relationship…
or what in the world should I buy for my wife.
Again… it’s just kinda stressful.
And for others of us…
This day… it maybe just makes us…
wanna gag a little bit.
It’s like Valentine’s Day… is right up there
next to… getting a root canal…
Am I right… all you single ladies? (move hands)
Again though… it is Valentine’s Day… and because it is…
I think we’re actually required… to talk about Love.
I think it’s required that we do…
And I just have to say… that all of you… are in luck today…
because I’m actually an expert on love.
I mean… You can call me the Love-Machine… if you want to.
My wife does.
And I think that’s the biggest lie… that I’ve ever told.
No but really… for the next 2 weeks…
we’re gonna talk about love…
and so… for today… to start things off… it’s probably a good idea…
to address… and to talk about…
what love is.
Now if you were to ask 100 people… the question of… what love is…
You’d probably get 100 different answers right?
I mean… some people would say that love is feeling…
It’s just a feeling that we feel.
And some people… would say that love is a parent…
cleaning up puke…
Have you ever been there?
Some people… would say that love is a battlefield…
Other people…would say that love is…
watching a sappy movie with your significant other.
And when it comes to our culture…
Our culture would be quick to say that… love is accepting.
And some would say… that love… is just whatever you want love to be.
And I know for me… when I think about love myself…
The very first thing that comes to mind is… love making.
Hashtag: boomshakalaka.
Ya know… and I’d be lying if I said otherwise.
And you’re not supposed to lie in church.
But this week… I asked my kids what love is…
And my oldest son Hudson… said:
Love is more than like… it’s love.
Which I thought was deep…
And it’s like write that down.
And my son Wilson…
said love… it’s when you hug and kiss someone.
Which is true buddy… and you’d better not
do that until at least you’re 35.
And my daughter Grayson said.
Love is when you love someone.
And all I know about her… is that I’m just so thankful…
that my daughter already… she’s only 5…
She’s already decided to become a nun.
I mean… she’s gotta date Jesus…
And even Jesus… better watch himself.
No but seriously… when you ask the simple question… of what love is…
You’ll most likely to get a different answer…
from each and every person that you ask.
But for this 2 week series…
Our intent isn’t to talk about…
what we have to say about love…
Instead my hope for us… is to find out… what God has to say…
about what love is.
Now… in the Bible… we come across a guy named Paul…
Paul’s a leader in the church…
And he wrote a bunch of letters… to different churches…
Which now make up like half of the New Testament today.
And in one of those letters…
he’s writing to the church in a city called Corinth…
and in the midst of his letter to them…
He begins to talk with them about what love is.
Like what true love is…
Like what God has to say about love.
Now if you’ve ever been to a wedding… like ever in your life…
You’ve most likely heard these verses before…
Because I think that they’ve been read…
at every wedding that’s ever taken place...
in the history of weddings. Right?
Like if you didn’t read these verses at your wedding…
I hate to tell you…
But you’re actually not married.
It wasn’t for real.
No but seriously…. Paul’s explaining love…
And here’s what he has to say about it…
He says that love is patient. Love is kind.
Love isn’t rude… and it doesn’t seek its own advantage.
It doesn’t keep record of complaints.
Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things,
hopes for all things, endures all things.
Sound familiar?
And so we read these verses at weddings…
and it’s like the most romantic thing ever right…
And we think: “my wife… I’m so excited…
She is gonna be so patient… and kind.
She isn’t ever gonna be rude…
even during certain times of the month.
And I’m not even sure what that means…
And my future husband…
isn’t ever gonna keep records of wrongs.
And He’s gonna put up with all things…
and hope for all things…
and He’s gonna gladly… do all things for the kids…
and He’s gonna be so focused on my needs.
And he’s gonna be so perfect!
And just in general… it’s like:
We just love… love right?
And God thank you for love…
And I mean… my wife… her love… it’s just gonna be so loving.
And it’s beautiful… and I just love… love.
And again… this is what we all think right?
When we read through these verses…
and we hear about what love is… we get all excited…
And we think about the love that we’re gonna receive in our marriage now…
or someday in the future
However… here’s the truth…
Hear this.
First off… these verses are actually not about marriage… at all.
Instead they’re actually for our lives as a whole…
I mean… Paul’s talking about… what love should look like…
in all aspects of our lives...
Whether it’s with our parents… or our siblings.
Whether it’s our friends… or our roommates.
Yes, with our spouse… no question.
but also with our kids.
And with our neighbors… and coworkers…
and with other Christians… and people in our church
And even with complete strangers.
Again… Paul’s not speaking at a wedding here…
instead he’s talking about the love that should be seen…
in all aspects of our lives.
And so there’s that… and then the other key thing to mention… about these verses…
and this is big…
is that Paul isn’t talking about the love…
that we should look to receive from others…
instead he’s talking about the love
that we should extend to others… ourselves.
Paul’s not talking about the love that we should look to receive…
instead He’s talking about the love that we should give.
And just to be clear… that’s 2 completely different things.
I mean… Paul’s basically saying:
Human beings… are hard to love.
And they’re self-centered…
And they’re wishy-washy
They’re jerky…
They’re funky
Whether it’s our friend…
Or our dad… or our spouse…
Our boss… or our ex…
He’s saying… they are so far from perfect.
And yet as followers of Jesus…
We’re called to love them…
and again hear this…
What is love? What does God say that love is?
He says that: Love is patient and love is kind.
And even with our mother-in-law…
and with our strange neighbor…
Love isn’t rude…
And even with our coworker…
Love doesn’t seek its own advantage.
And even with our sibling…
love doesn’t keep record of complaints.
And even with the imperfect people in our lives…
Even with our spouse… long after the honeymoon wears off…
Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things,
hopes for all things, and endures all things.
Now isn’t that… just one of the worst set of verses ever?
It sounds horrible… like why would we ever wanna do that?
And I just wanna say…
That if you did read these verses at your wedding…
don’t feel bad…
they are definitely beautiful verses…
they are definitely beautiful…
just in an ugly terrible sort of way.
No but really… Paul’s saying… this here… this is what love is.
It’s so much deeper… and richer…
than the love you’ll hear about elsewhere.
And it takes hard work… and at times it’s grueling to extend…
And you won’t wanna love people like this…
And it’s completely foreign… to the “love only when it feels good”…
love that you’ll find in the world…
And yet… as followers of Jesus…
this is the kind of love that we should strive to offer…
this is the kind of love that should be present in our lives…
this is the kind of love that we shouldn’t look to receive…
Instead it’s the kind of of love that we look to give…
and to extend to others… ourselves.
Through Paul… God’s saying… this is love…
And as followers of Jesus…
this is the kind of love…
that should be present in our lives.
Now… I don’t know about you…
but I just gotta say…
that this is… so much easier said than done… isn’t it?
I mean… as we just said… human beings are hard to love.
And they so often… really don’t deserve it.
And I know in my own life…
it seems like the older I get… the harder it is to love…
Because I’m probably more jaded than I was years ago…
and my life is just that much busier…
And so… whether it’s coming home… and trying to love my kids…
after a long day at work…
Sometimes… I just wanna come in the front door
and go hide in my bedroom.
and the last thing I wanna do is be patient and kind with them.
Or whether it’s with family members…
Just in general…
family can be the hardest people to love… can’t they?
There’s just so much history with them…
and it almost feels impossible…
to not keep a record of their wrongs….
Especially when it feels like they’re doing so for us.
Or whether it’s with our neighbors… or coworkers… or random strangers…
It’s just so easy to be completely annoyed
and irritated by other human beings…
And sometimes it’s like:
Is it weird… that I daydream about slashing people’s tires?
Or whether it’s the person that we’re married to…
You see the good, bad, and otherwise in each other…
And you share a bank account with them…
And you parent terrorists together…
And you’ve smelled their breath in the morning…
And it’s just like… I don’t know if I wanna “put up with all things”…
And endure all things… any longer.
And yet once more… as followers of Jesus…
this is the kind of love…
that we’re called to extend to others… ourselves.
Okay so this is great…
but now… maybe we’re here…
and we’re just wondering… well how do we do this then?
Like really?
Whether… it’s our friend, our cousin, or our son…
how do we love others this way?
Because I mean… this standard of love… well… it just seems impossible.
It just seems impossible right?
And the truth is… that on our own…
It actually is impossible… for us to love others this way…
On on our own… “you’re right… and I’m so glad you realized it…
it’s impossible for us… to have this kind of love.
But you see… as followers of Jesus… we have God within us…
When we invite God into our lives…
When we start following Him…
When we surrender to Him…
Then it’s no longer our love…
but His love… flowing in and through us.
It’s about God’s love not our own.
It’s no longer… about us…
trying to love our spouse or our mom… on our own…
out of our own goodness…
out of our own heart…
out of our own love…
Instead it’s all God…
And it’s His heart… within us.
It’s His love that first fills us…
And then… it overflows unto the people around us.
Instead of a chocolate fountain… we become like a love fountain…
That’s just spilling and dripping love all over the place.
It’s like a bad first kiss or something…
And if we haven’t heard…
God’s love… it endures forever.
It never runs dry.
His love… it never comes to an end.
Again… this love…
it is impossible for us… to have and give to others on our own…
but thankfully… it’s only about God…
and His love…. not our own.
And so instead of us… just trying to do it on our own…
Our prayer becomes:
“God, I’m struggling to love my coworker.”
but would you help me to love them?
“And Lord, I’m struggling to love my daughter…
I’m struggling with patience…
I’m struggling with kindness towards her
And so would you give me your love towards her.
And Father… I’m struggling with loving my husband… or my wife.
Would you help me to choose your love each day…
I wanna choose to faithfully love them…
even when I don’t feel like it.
“And Jesus, I’m struggling with bitterness…
towards this person in my past…
towards this person that hurt me.
And so would you help me to keep no record of wrongs…
and would I just extend your love…
and your grace towards them.
Once more… on our own… it is impossible for us…
to have and to give this love to others ourselves…
but thankfully it’s about God’s love… not our own.
and His love… it never comes to an end.
And so there’s that…
but some other random things… that I just quickly wanna say here…
when it comes to loving others this way…
is that it won’t be easy.
At times it won’t make any sense at all.
At times it’s grueling to love others this way…
Honestly… loving like Jesus… is hard.
At times… Following Jesus is challenging.
And we were never told that it would be easy.
And some other practical advice… to loving others…
Especially when it’s a person that’s hard to love…
How do we love others?
There’s something powerful about serving them…
and doing good towards them.
Going out of our way to be kind towards the person…
And that makes no sense right?
But I’ve found… that so often our feelings… will follow our actions…
And so… instead of just listening to our feelings…
which come and go… and are up and down.
It’s choosing to love our neighbor…
Choosing to do good towards our friend… or our roommate.
And slowly but surely… so often… our feelings will follow.
Another thing… is trying to realize that everyone has a story…
We know our own story… and the crap that we’ve experienced.
But we don’t always know someone else’s….
And it’s easy to be annoyed at someone… when you don’t know their story.
And when you just think they’re a jerk… because they’re a jerk.
But when you begin to know a person’s story…
Or are even open to the fact… that they might have a story…
It’s easier to love them.
Another piece of practical advice to loving someone… that’s hard to love…
Is just praying for them…
Praying that Jesus… would take them home right?
I’m just kidding.
No but seriously… Praying for good to come their way.
Praying for the things going on in their life.
Praying that they’d have a good day.
Prayer is so powerful… and it has the ability to change others…
But more importantly… it has the ability…
to change ourselves.
Now as we wrap things up today…
I think with all of this… it’d be so easy to think or wonder….
“Well… how important is love?” I mean really…
How important is it that we love others?
Because I’ve been following Jesus for years now Pastor…
and this just kinda seems shallow… and elementary…
And I’m a deep Christian…
And I wanna grow in my understanding of God.
and this just seems so basic…
And so… I’m just curious… as followers of Jesus…
like… does this really matter?
And does God really care about this?
Well… going back to our verses… listen to what Paul says…
Before He explains what love is.
Listen to what he says…
And again… Paul’s talking to a church… just like us…
And here’s what he says… He says:
If I could speak all the languages of earth and of the angels,
but didn't love others,
I would only be like a noisy gong or a clashing cymbal.
And just picture that… (move hands)
Is there anything worse?
And he goes onto say… that if I have such a complete faith
that I could physically move mountains…
which would be impressive…
but I don't have love… I am nothing. I’m nothing.
And then hear this…
He says… If I gave everything I have to the poor
and even sacrificed my body for God…
Like if I died because of my faith…
but I don't have love, I receive no benefit whatsoever.
I mean… Paul’s basically saying…
That loving God and loving others… it’s like the most important thing.
And you can be as religious as you want.
And you can do a bunch of awesome great things…
in the name of Jesus.
And you can be baptized… and confirmed… and made into a saint.
And you can look and sound all holy…
And you can give all your money away…
And memorize the entire Bible.
But if you don’t have love like this…
It all means nothing. Nothing.
Wow… right?
It’s like… we might wanna take note of this.
I mean God’s making it clear…
that loving people like this… is a core value of what it means to follow Jesus.
And I know for myself… something that I often think about…
is that at the end of my life… at my funeral someday.
And is that morbid to think about?
At the end of my life… I pray that those closest to me…
will have the best things to say about me.
That those closest to me…
Starting with my wife Bec…
and the kids… my family… and my friends…
the people in my small group.
The different staff that I’ve worked with.
my neighbors…
I pray that these people will be the first people in line…
to talk about my love for God…
and my love for others.
I mean… Adam was far from perfect…
He was the first to admit it…
He was kinda crazy… and he was bald at a young age.
and he was crazy passionate…
but there’s no question that He loved Jesus…
and he loved people.
I mean… what a failure it would be…
to pastor a church…
and to do a bunch of “good things”…
and launch a bunch of campuses…
and to impact the lives…
of all kinds of people
and yet have those closest to me… think that I’m a jerk.
It’d be complete failure.
Like Paul says… it’d all mean nothing.
Once more… what is love? What is it?
God says that:
Love is patient. Love is kind.
Love isn’t rude… and it doesn’t seek its own advantage.
It doesn’t keep record of complaints.
Love puts up with all things, trusts in all things,
hopes for all things, endures all things.
Let’s pray!
