THE DISEASE OF DIOTREPHES
3 John 1:9-10 (NIV)
9 I wrote to the church, but Diotrephes, who loves to be first, will have nothing to do with us.
10 So if I come, I will call attention to what he is doing, gossiping maliciously about us. Not satisfied with that, he refuses to welcome the brothers. He also stops those who want to do so and puts them out of the church.
John doesn’t write much about this man named Diotrephes but what he does write isn’t very flattering - and rightly so. It appears that this Diotrephes is a man that John fully intends on confronting if he returns to the church that he is referring to. In looking at this man Diotrephes today I believe that we will uncover four characteristics that can cause problems in the Christian community. If these characteristics go unrecognized they quickly lead to what I would diagnose as Diotrephes disease.
He loves to be first (v.9)
How does this desire usually show itself?
Have you ever seen the actions and reactions, the behaviors, the attitudes of someone who loves to be first? Such people are usually filled with pride - the kind of pride that is not easily humbled. Such people like to have the best seats (the front seat in the car), like to have their name prominently mentioned whenever possible, have to have the jobs that get tons of recognition, and always want to have to last word…
Why do you think people want to be first?
Maybe they want recognition, maybe its because they’re afraid of being last, of being left out or left behind. Maybe they crave the attention. Maybe its because they want to hide some weakness they have. The truth is people want to be first because it satisfies their desire to feel needed .
Is it possible for Christians to have this attitude? Oh no, Christians never have this attitude, after all - wasn’t it Jesus who said the last will be first and the first will be last? "I’m going to do everything I can to be last so that I’ll be first!!!" Is that really what Jesus was saying?
Mark 9:33-35 (NIV)
33 They came to Capernaum. When he was in the house, he asked them, "What were you arguing about on the road?"
34 But they kept quiet because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest.
35 Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, "If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all."
One the major themes of Jesus ministry was the principle of servant leadership. The idea that principle positions come at the cost of humble hard work. The disciples were arguing amongst themselves about who was the greatest - oh their lines of conversation is not recorded but I’m sure it included a few things such as, "I followed Jesus first!!" "I’ve given up more to follow Jesus!!" "Jesus hasn’t rebuked me as much as he’s rebuked some of you!!" or perhaps even, "I’m greater than all of you because I’m the one that Jesus put in charge of the money…." Is this argument much different than some of the arguments we sometimes carry on today? The reason why the disciples kept so quiet when Jesus asked "What are you arguing about?" is because they probably knew what Jesus would say to them, Jesus reinforces this message many times, in Matthew 19:28-30 Jesus indicates that at the end times many who are first will be last and many who are last will be first. In Matthew 20:1-16 Jesus uses the parable of the workers in the Vineyard to teach this same principle. It is reemphasized in Mark 10:25-31 and again in Luke 13:22-30.
So if wanting to be first is a undesirable "Diotrephes" characteristic what kind of attitude should we have?
Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV)
3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.
4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Are you doing anything to develop this kind of attitude? If so, what are you doing? Do you catch yourself arguing your greatness? Do you eagerly seek out ways in which you can serve others? Do you seek to lead by example or simply go around telling people the right way to do things?
Do you have this symptom of Diotrephes disease or are you living out the cure?
He would have nothing to do with us (vs.9)
The "us" in this passage refers to John and his companions. What is significant about this is that John was an apostle of Jesus Christ - one of the leaders of the early Christian church and certainly a significant player in the shaping and cultivating of the new believers in the Kingdom of God. However we find it written that Diotrephes would have nothing to do with John or his companions….Why? Why do you think Diotrephes would want to reject one of Jesus’ apostles? More than likely it is because of the threat John and company pose to Diotrephes position and influence. Remember that Diotrephes loves to be first. One of the signposts of such a person is that they won’t play second fiddle to nobody. They won’t accept anybody’s authority over them. Needless to say such people don’t really operate well in democratic meetings.
Let me ask you this question…Do we ever reject leaders in the church today? Has there ever been a time where you’ve had nothing to do with a leader in the church because you don’t like them or don’t like their style of ministry or because they’ve hurt you? Or maybe its because they’ve exercised their leadership over you and you didn’t like it? How did you respond? Or maybe you’ve witnessed and seen someone else in the church respond this way to a leader in the church.
Hebrews 13:7 (NIV) Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith.
In what ways does the writer of Hebrews tell us to treat the leaders of the church?
"Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith" Couched in here is a very important principle regarding our attitude towards our leaders. "Consider" is used before "imitate". What is the outcome of your leader’s way of life? Don’t imitate your leader if the outcome of their way of life is contrary to what the scripture teaches.
Mention also must be made of "imitate". Notice the writer did not say "and imitate them" it says "and imitate their faith" No leader is perfect and we’re not asked to imitate their imperfections - rather we’re asked to imitate their faith.
Hebrews 13:17 (NIV) Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.
Obedience and submission are two words that a person who loves to be first really hates. This is the case because a person who loves to be first does not recognize the authority of someone who is a leader over them.
In obeying and submitting to the authority of your leaders it must be remembered that the leaders themselves will give an account of their leadership. You don’t think they are good leaders, you think you would do a better job, you don’t like the way they handled a particular situation? Fine but remember unless they are removed from their leadership by God they still have been given authority by God - oh don’t worry they will eventually account for their actions.
Another significant thing mentioned in this verse is easily understood if you’ve ever tried to lead a Sunday School class of 2-6 year olds. It is a much more joyful and rewarding experience if the children obey the leader when being taught!! That is the way it is in the church as well. Notice the tail end, "for that would be of no advantage to you." Obeying your leaders (that is, listening to their suggestions, following their advice, accepting their discipline) is not for their advantage but for yours!! …. (Moses and Israel)
He is gossiping maliciously (v.10)
Not only did Diotrephes have nothing to do with John and company but he began to speak ill about them to others - but that is probably a very light way of putting it. Gossip is idle talk - its when you talk about others behind their backs. It usually begins with the words, "Did you know?…" I’ve heard gossip defined as, "verbal diarrhea" - I tend to agree with this definition.
Why do people gossip? Again, it is heavily related to the desire to be first!! When people gossip they are really saying, "Guess what I just found out!!", or "I know something you don’t know…". In Diotrephes case his malicious gossip was intended to degrade the authority of the apostle’s leadership and puff up himself. You know the funny thing about gossiping is we’re ready to expound on the latest troubles or failures about someone but we’re not doing the slightest thing to help them.
One of the saddest effects of gossip is that it often involves the spreading of lies. Oh what may have started out to be true by the time it gets to the 10th or 11th person the story has changed so much that if the 1st person was to hear it they would think its a new tidbit of information to pass along!! Gossip is something that destroys a body believers rather than building up. It causes distrust, anger, hurt feelings, broken relationships, and spreads Diotrephes disease like wildfire.
Ephesians 4:25 (NIV) Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body.
Ephesians 4:29 (NIV) Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
James 3: 4-10
4 Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go.
5 Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.
6 The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell.
7 All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man,
8 but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
9 With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness.
10 Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.
What are you willing to do to stop gossip in its tracks when it comes around to you?
He refuses to welcome the brothers (v.10)
Diotrephes was guilty not only of gossiping maliciously about John and company but also made sure that any associates of John would not be welcome. Now Diotrephes is going so far as to distance himself from the fellowship of these "brothers in Christ"!!
Does this ever happen today? Is there ever a time when you want to close the door of welcome on those who come seeking to fellowship with this church? with you? What are the ways we use to make people feel unwelcome?
The Bible speaks of certain criteria that we should look to in deciding whether we should separate ourselves from fellowship with certain believers:
Romans 16:17-18 (NIV)
17 I urge you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned. Keep away from them.
18 For such people are not serving our Lord Christ, but their own appetites. By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people.
Hmm…such a person would seem to be suffering from Diotrephes disease!
Titus 3:9-11 (NIV)
9 But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless.
10 Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that, have nothing to do with him.
11 You may be sure that such a man is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned.
Wait a minute here - these passages don’t say anything about not liking a person - what about our personality clash!! Surely I can have nothing to do with the person I don’t agree with? You don’t understand that person is a little bit weird…. Sorry, these reasons aren’t sufficient to justify not welcoming someone.
Again Diotrephes failed to welcome the brothers not because they deceive the minds of naïve people by smooth talk and flattery - not because they are divisive (that is they seek to bring division to the church) but because… he desires to be first.
One of the biggest dangers of a church contracting Diotrephes disease is that it starts to become inward reaching instead of outward stretching. Instead of being encouraged by new people coming into the church and welcoming them with open arms such a church feels threatened because these new people might bring problems we can’t handle or they may be better singers, or better musicians, or better teachers, or make a better casserole or pie than we can. Or doesn’t it seem that the pastor has been spending more time with the new people recently? Grumble…grumble…grumble… Folks the challenge presented by this attitude of Diotrephes is to overcome our tendencies to continue to nurse the exclusive club mentality is to stretch out and make people feel welcome - going beyond the simple hello and handshake during service, going beyond the casual wave around town - and onto the dinner invitations - the surprise visits - the invitation to participate in church activities - the offer to drive to church…..
Diotrephes saw some people stretching out to welcome the brothers and 3 John records, "he stops those who want to do so and puts them out of the church" Diotrephes and the people that were infected with his disease became so inward reaching that they became angry towards the people who knew the right thing to do and did it.
James 4:17 (NIV) Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn’t do it, sins.
Have you ever reacted the way Diotrephes did? Have you ever become angry with someone who has confronted you with the right thing to do and ignored them?
Some churches today are struggling because there are people who are outward stretching and they are being labeled as outcast by those who are inward stretching.
What we’ve seen in the life of Diotrephes tonight should serve as a warning to those of us who may have had the symptoms of Diotrephes disease and as a prevention from witnessing this disease take hold in our church as it grows.
The major cause of this disease had its tendrils running through every characteristic that we discussed tonight and that is the desire to be first This is what I want to focus on as this message draws to an end. If we’re going to become immune to Diotrephes disease we must first be willing to administer the vaccine of humility and total submission and obedience to our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. If we realize the primary position of Jesus Christ in our lives then it becomes easier for us to forget about our own desire to be number one… in every church - in every heart there lies the potential to be a Diotrephes - let’s administer the vaccine together…PRAY.
Amen
