Summary: Christmas is the time to be family.

TOUCH THE FAMILY

Matthew 1:18-25

S: Love a Family Member

Th: The Christmas Touch

Pr: CHRISTMAS IS THE TIME TO BE FAMILY.

?: Inductive

KW: Stages

TS: We will find in the story found in Matthew 1:18-25 five stages that demonstrate that Christmas is the time to be family.

The _____ stage is…

I. SITUATION (18)

II. SEPARATION (19)

III. SECRET (20)

IV. SATISFACTION (21-23)

V. SERVICE (24-25)

RMBC 16 December 01 AM

INTRODUCTION:

ILL Notebook: Christmas (rich Armstrongs) [Judy is made up for unknown name]

Rick and Judy Armstrong had a hectic holiday schedule encompassing careers, teenagers, shopping, and all the required doings of the season. Realizing that she would be short of time, she had the stationer print their signature on their Christmas cards, instead of signing each one.

Soon they started getting cards from friends signed "The Modest Morrisons," "The Clever Clarks," and "The Successful Smiths." Then she discovered the stationer’s subtle mistake. She had mailed out a hundred cards neatly imprinted with "Happy Holidays from the Rich Armstrongs."

I’m sure they laughed their way through that mistake.

But sometimes, during this time of the year, when things do go wrong, it is easy to throw up our hands and say, “What is the use?”

It just seems to be too much.

1. Have you ever wanted to skip Christmas?

ILL Grisham Skipping Christmas

John Grisham has a new book out this year that is on the bestseller’s list. It is called Skipping Christmas. The book begins with Luther and Nora Krank saying good-bye to their daughter, Blair, who is going to be in Peru for a year with the Peace Corps. Since this will be their first Christmas without Blair, they decide to skip it and go on a cruise instead. It is a fun read as they go through the adventure of telling everyone that they are not participating in anything that has to do with Christmas. And sometimes you find yourselves rooting for them and at other times thinking, “Are they nuts?” I’m not going to give away the ending, but I did find myself laughing out loud at several points as they find there is as much stress in avoiding Christmas as there is in celebrating it.

(By the way, the ending does it make a worthwhile read—I recommend it.)

There is no doubt that Christmas can be a time of stress rather than peace.

There is a touch of irony in that, isn’t there?

I mean…

2. Isn’t it amazing that we show the least amount of tolerance during a time that is to be distinguished by peace?

Do you know what the best part of Christmas is?

It is being together with members of your family.

Do you know that the worst part is?

It is being together with members of your family.

It would be funny if it weren’t true.

Right?

Well, we know that Christmastime is family time.

But sometimes there is a lot of stress when it comes with being with family.

Those imperfections become difficult to digest.

In fact, because of past mistakes in our relationships, the relationships may be more known for anger, heartache and confusion rather than peace and good will.

Interestingly, those characteristics were something that Joseph experienced as well.

He knew anger, heartache and confusion.

It is Joseph who we are studying this morning, and so…

3. We will find five stages in our study of Joseph that will help us understand how he handled the first Christmas dilemma.

OUR STUDY:

I. The first stage is the SITUATION (18).

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit.

The text tells us that Mary was found to be with child.

If the fact of her pregnancy wasn’t shocking enough, the explanation was even worse!

It was simply unbelievable.

The text also tells us that Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph.

They were not technically married yet, but in a way they were.

This pledge was a great deal more formal than our engagement period is today.

It was a kind of pre-marriage relationship, so much so that a rabbi would perform a ceremony for this pledge.

During this time that lasted about a year, abstinence was to be maintained until after the official marriage ceremony.

If during that period a woman became pregnant, it was viewed as adultery.

Under the strictest interpretation of the Old Testament law it was punishable by death for both parties.

But to be fair, it was not normally enforced during the time of Mary and Joseph.

So…

Joseph is faced with a crisis of betrayal.

Mary’s pregnancy was a breach of contract.

And her explanation that God made her pregnant…well, would you believe that?

Joseph wasn’t that gullible.

It is apparent to Joseph that Mary is not the person that he thought she was.

As I was studying this week, I read someone criticizing Joseph for jumping to conclusions.

He should not have acted until he had all the facts first.

I really scratched my head on that one.

What other conclusion was he going to come to?

This is a big disappointment.

He had to be shocked and humiliated.

After all, Mary was carrying somebody else’s baby.

He was, in essence, a jilted lover.

Which leads us to…

II. The second stage is the SEPARATION (19).

Because Joseph her husband was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.

We find that…

Joseph tempers justice with mercy.

The text tells us that Joseph was a righteous man.

This means that Joseph’s life had been shaped by the transforming touch of God.

He was a spiritually sensitive man that was committed to doing the right thing in every circumstance.

So when he decides what he has to do about Mary’s pregnancy, it is his goal to not embarrass or disgrace her.

He does not want to hurt her any further.

There would be enough hurt as it is.

There would be public ridicule.

There would be consequences to being pregnant and unmarried.

So, he has his own solution.

He will move on with his life without Mary.

And compassionately, he will break off the pledged marriage and divorce her.

Now we come to…

III. The third stage is the SECRET (20).

But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.”

Can you imagine having a dream when you are told, in effect, to wake up?

“Joseph, Wake up!”

You’ve been drafted!

And…

Joseph gets the inside information.

…literally…

Mary wasn’t telling a story after all, even though it violated common sense.

These were circumstances that seemed so unreal.

But Joseph was now learning a valuable lesson that would carry Him for a lifetime.

Never underestimate God.

For…

IV. The fourth stage is the SATISFACTION (21-23).

“She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel”—which means, “God with us.”

Joseph discovers he is part of a bigger plan.

Joseph is instructed to give this baby a name.

It was Joshua (Jesus is the Greek form of the Hebrew, Joshua).

It was a very common name with a very powerful meaning.

It means salvation.

And Joseph was to name Him Joshua because this son was going to save His people from their sins.

ILL Notebook: Christmas (it’s a God)

There was a group of first graders who got together and decided to write their own version of the Nativity. It was more modern than the traditional drama. There were the familiar members of the cast: Joseph, the shepherds, and an angel propped up in the background. But Mary was nowhere to be seen.

Suddenly behind the bales of hay could be heard some loud moans and groans. Evidently Mary was in labor. Soon the doctor arrived dressed in a white coat with a stethoscope around his neck. Joseph, with a look of relief on his face takes the doctor straight to Mary, then starts pacing back and forth.

After a few moments the "doctor" emerges with a big smile on his face. "Congratulations, Joseph," he says, "It’s a God."

Well, that was the message the angel was giving Joseph as well.

This baby was “Immanuel.”

He would be “God with us.”

This was the ultimate miracle.

So, it was time for Joseph to get on board.

And he does…

V. The fifth stage is the SERVICE (24-25).

When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he had no union with her until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.

The dream works and Joseph is convinced.

His anxiety is gone.

And now he has faith in the unbelievable.

As a result…

Joseph provides for Mary regardless of the cost.

He chooses to love and understand.

He chooses to get married so that they will now live together and share the home, even though the betrothal period would not be up.

This would undoubtedly raise the eyebrows of the community.

It would be presumed by the busybodies standing on the street corners that Joseph and Mary had been unable to wait sexually through their engagement period.

Nazareth was a very small town, so the gossip would be going wild, because people knew how to do math back then.

The impeccable character of Joseph would be undermined.

Nevertheless, he tenderly cared for Mary.

He decided to love her in these difficult situations, no matter what the stress was that they were facing.

ILL McQuilkin

Dr. Robertson McQuilkin was for many years the president of Columbia Bible College and Columbia Seminary in South Carolina. For a number of years, he was well known as a Bible teacher, scholar and author. When he was in his early sixties, his wife developed Alzheimer’s. He could have put her into a facility that would have cared for her very well. Instead, he chose to resign his position and devote his life to caring for her. When questioned about why he would need to do that, his answer was simply, “That’s what God wants me to do.” It was an answer that was a demonstration of a commitment of love for both his wife and his Lord.

In the same way, Joseph also was willing to sacrifice his own hopes, dreams and plans for his life.

He would keep his commitment to Mary and to God, sacrificing even his own reputation.

Now, that’s a demonstration of love.

APPLICATION:

So…please note this…

1. CHRISTMAS IS THE TIME TO BE FAMILY.

Notice, that this time I didn’t say that Christmas is a time for family.

Christmas is a time to be family.

It is an important distinction.

Many of us are going to spend time looking for just the right gift for someone we care about, whether it is for a spouse or children, parents, or perhaps a really good friend.

The gift will be a demonstration of our love for them.

Many of us will gather next week and spend time with grandparents, uncles and aunts, and cousins.

I mean…what would this most special of holidays be without extended relatives?

Perhaps you shouldn’t answer that!

But it is at Christmas we are reminded of our identity as we celebrate our ancestry.

We are not isolated persons existing in a vacuum.

We belong to those who claim a common name and a common past.

ILL Drama “A Father’s Love”

God wants us to love our family members even when we feel disappointed or let down by them.

Why?

Because, like Joseph, it is time to be family.

The example of Joseph challenges us to not look out for our own interests, but to the interest of those who call us family.

For…

2. We follow the example of Jesus by seeking for ways to love each other (Philippians 2:1-8, The Message).

Note how this familiar passage in Philippians is expressed in The Message:

If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in the community of Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care—then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.

Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn’t think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn’t claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death—and the worst kind of death at that: a crucifixion.

Today is a day to love a family member.

Perhaps it will be a relative that needs your love.

Perhaps it is someone that is in your extended family called the church.

Wherever this person is, touch them with God’s love.

Look out for their interests and needs, just as Joseph did for Mary and also, as Jesus did for us.

BENEDICTION: [Counselors are ]

Touch your family…yes, it is stressful to keep all the family-related plates in the air and spinning, but have patience with those around you, especially the children…don’t let them miss the awe of the season.

Touch your family…especially those that drive you crazy; so guard your tongue and very selective amnesia to things in the past; forgive as the Lord has forgiven you.

Touch your family…look out for the interests of others, just as Jesus looked out for yours; He set aside the privilege of deity and took on the status of a slave; let us follow His example and serve others for the glory of His name.

Now may your love abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best; and may you be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God. Amen.

This series of messages was based on Mainstay Church Resources’, “The Christmas Touch, Making Christlike Connections during the Holidays.” The resources they provided were used in the development of these messages.