Summary: The "marriage prayer"...how couples can experience God’s blessing.

Psalm Steps> Psalm 128, “Live Long and Prosper” Pastor Bob Leroe, Cliftondale Congregational Church, Saugus, Massachusetts

When I served as Post Chaplain of Fort Story, Virginia, I conducted a memorable summer wedding at the First Landing Chapel. The air conditioning was working, and I was feeling comfortable, even though I had my robe over my uniform. But half-way through the wedding I noticed something wrong with the bride & groom. The groom was sweating profusely; he almost looked like a cartoon, with his hair soaking wet and dripping. Then I glanced at the bride. She had on a low-cut gown, and I could see she had broken out in purple blotches. Both were looking rather grim. When they knelt on the wedding kneeler, people started to laugh—someone had written on the back of the grooms shoes in white paint the words: “HELP ME”. At that point I decided to hurry the ceremony along before they both passed out! Getting married can be a stressful event. Solomon offers some wise words of comfort to prospective brides and grooms.

Psalm 128 is called the “Marriage Prayer” because it is sung at Jewish weddings. It sounds like the toast the Best Man gives at the wedding reception. Families made the pilgrimage to Jerusalem together, so this is an appropriate song for the journey. Whether we’re single or married, this selection from the Psalms of Ascent shows us how to discover true happiness and prosperity. Martin Luther seemed to regard it differently, however; he called this a psalm of comfort for those who’ve experienced the “crosses” of married life. I’m not sure specifically what he had in mind; maybe that couple from Fort Story! Today’s psalm parallels and is a companion piece to Psalm 127.

We all know people who are killing themselves to get ahead in life, to find happiness. Many never find it. How do we equate happiness? Psalm 128 starts out with the word “blessed”. To be blessed is to be truly happy, regardless of circumstances. It includes well-being, fullness, prosperity. The Jewish Talmud states, “We see life, not as it is, but as we are.” It’s a matter of perception, which means that some people will never be happy, no matter what. We see clearly when we see life from God’s perspective. When we look with spiritual eyes, we learn what’s really important in life. True happiness is not something external or fleeting; it is within, and for good. Happiness isn’t a matter of luck; there are no tricks involved. We simply become Christians and begin the life of faith. We learn to be content with what we have when we base our joy on a higher standard.

We discover blessing by fearing the Lord, verse 1. Reverence would be a more accurate word than fear. Sometimes we try to bring God down to our understanding, to the size of our small minds, confining Him within boundaries we construct. To guard against this limited thinking, the Bible encourages us to hold God in awe, to bring our attention to His overwhelming majesty and grandeur. When we hold God in wonder, we begin to walk the path of blessedness.

The fear of God is the one fear that removes all others. We are not “afraid” of God, but we show Him due respect. We take God seriously. We recognize that He is holy. Therefore, He must be at the center of everything we are, think, and aspire to do. He must be our starting point for every endeavor. Paul counsels us in Colossians 1:18 that “in all things Christ should have the preeminence.” If we reverence God, we will not make plans, then pray as an after-thought; we will begin with God. This reverent fear of the Lord is so important, Solomon repeats himself in verse 4.

The next step is to “walk in His ways.” We need to travel God’s way by thinking and behaving biblically. Happiness is the by-product of a life that is lived in the will of God. Obedience to God the natural outcome of regarding God with reverence and respect. Eugene Peterson writes how people are “forever breaking the rules, attempting to create their own system of values and truth from scratch.” They usually end up “calling up someone to get them out of trouble and help repair the damages, and then ask the question, ‘What went wrong’?” Another way of looking at it is this: If you go against the grain of God’s Law, you get splinters.

Our beliefs determine our behavior. To think secularly is to operate within a frame of reference restricted by the limits of our world. Is our thinking earth-bound or heavenly-minded? To think as a Christian is to regard all things as related to God’s purpose. We can expect blessing when we live with a constant awareness that we belong to God.

When we walk with God we can expect Him to bless our work, verse 2. We may not perceive the blessing; we may wonder how God is working at times, but we trust His plan to produce the intended results. I believe God calls all of us to our vocations in life. He opens and closes doors of opportunity, and helps us to succeed in our goals. Some of us have very stressful jobs; God can nonetheless help us to rise above the circumstances and face the workday with strength from Above. Jacque Plante, former goalie for the Montreal Canadiens, said of his career: “How would you like it in your job if every time you made a mistake, a red light went on over your desk and fifteen thousand people stood up and yelled at you?” I suppose things could be worse where we work. We need to keep in mind that in the Christian life prosperity and success aren’t measured by the standards of the world. In our striving for success, we may achieve our goal and live to regret it. In whatever we do, without God we will either fail miserably or succeed miserably. Happiness comes from doing things God’s way.

Our reward for labor is to “eat the fruit”—we might envision Norman Rockwell’s painting of a family gathered around a Thanksgiving dinner. We often take our daily bread for granted, and even eat without first thanking God for His provision. We’re tempted to take the credit for having food on our table. If so, we’re forgetting the Source of our provision.

Another illustration of God’s blessing is a healthy marriage, vs 3. Anyone who’s tried to raise a family might well regard these verses with some skepticism. Families are made up of people, and people are sinners. Sin can disrupt even the healthiest relationships. Psalm 128 isn’t promising utopia or non-stop domestic bliss, but we can expect God to bless our homes.

Wives are called “fruitful vines”. Grapevines are Jewish symbols of prosperity, of abundant life. Having children is only part of the picture. Proverbs 31 lists the varied activities of women of “noble character,” skilled and compassionate. Why emphasize having babies? Large families were especially regarded as a mark of prosperity in Bible times where life was agriculturally-based; people lived in extended families, several generations under the same roof. It’s not the same today. What’s the difference between a millionaire and a couple with 6 children? The millionaire wants more! “Olive shoots” were another Jewish symbol of richness. A modern translation describes the scene: “The children around your table are as fresh and promising as young olive plants” (The Message). A Rabbi said, “I never call my wife ‘my wife’; I call her ‘my home’, she who makes a home for my children.”

Some people try to fabricate this blessing. In Japan there is a company from which you can rent a family. The frantic pace of life, and the high rate of karoshi, or “death from over-work”, has led people to rent families who will show up on their doorstep and greet them with enthusiastic warmth. It’s not a cheap service, yet the business is a huge success. The founder of the company explains, “What is common about our clients is that they are thirsty for human love.” We should be glad God didn’t contact this service when we needed love. In spite of the company’s claims, love can’t be marketed or fabricated. It can only be unconditionally given. You can’t rent a blessing.

After the repeated blessing of verse 4 (for those who fear God), the blessing extends from the family unit to the nation, verses 5-6. There is power in the pronouncement of a blessing. These are not empty words. They convey a wish of prosperity and peace for the nation, and they are spoken with divine authority. While we’re counting our blessings, we can count on being blessed in days to come.

Sometimes life is so messed up that only church makes any sense. When we come to the end of our resources we find ourselves open to what God can do in our lives. We come to church to encounter God, and to confront our problems head-on. Sometimes we try to avoid pain by isolating ourselves from others, and by ignoring their needs, but in so doing we miss many blessings. People are blessed in church, but we don’t hand out blessings like bulletins. We’re blessed by meeting with God, by dealing with our inner spiritual life, by reverently worshipping Him, by seeking His will for us, by confessing our sins, by studying His word, and by opening ourselves to the transforming power of the Holy Spirit. Through Christ we experience healing and wholeness.