Summary: Pity is natural but is for others not ourselves. Self Pity is dangerous. (1)Everyone is subject to self pity (2ADVERSITY IS NOT MEANT TO LEAD US TO SELF PITY BUT TO STRENGHTH IN CHRIST(3)Turning to God in our self pity is our hope for deliverance from it

No Place for a Pity Party MT 16:21-24

If we think in terms of thankfulness we might say that there are many emotions that would compliment a heart that is filled with thanksgiving. For example love compliments thanksgiving, happiness compliments thanksgiving, joy and peace are productive to a heart of thanksgiving

but what about that which is not productive to thanksgiving. Certainly hate, envy, disgust, or even pity can hinder a heart from being thankful.

Consider with me that pity is a real emotion and it has it’s place but pity is largely an emotion we should have toward others and not our selves. I

say that realizing that a lot of people have faced difficult, devastating and even deadly circumstances at times and their situations and circumstances are worthy of our sympathy and certainly our prayers...HOWEVER there still exists no more dangerous sort of pity than self pity.

Jesus serves as an example of someone who if anyone could have warranted having a pity party for himself. He would face what no one had ever faced. What no one else could bare to face....

and yet Christ went to the cross not deserving it but taking the weight of our sin upon Himself as He was about to die an agonizing death upon the cross for which He did not deserve but He took our place of guilt in order to remove our sins.

Jesus saw the cross on the horizon He knew the difficult fate that lie ahead even as He lived out His earthly ministry. He spoke of what would happen to Him to his friends and followers and he did not say.

“Woe is me...”

He did not sing a song of pity words of”.. troubles...I’ve got more than anyone”

. He did not whine or complain or pout about the cross. He did not ask for...... or throw his own pity party.

Look at His words and how they give no indication of pity.

Matthew 16

21 From that time on Jesus began to explain to his disciples that he must go to Jerusalem and suffer many things at the hands of the elders, chief priests and teachers of the law, and that he must be killed and on the third day be raised to life.

22Peter took him aside and began to rebuke him. "Never, Lord!" he said. "This shall never happen to you!"

23Jesus turned and said to Peter, "Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the things of God, but the things of men."

24Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

Pity for one’s self will lead us to be weak.

Pity for one’s self will lead us to give up.

It will lead us to hopelessness....and to a sense of defeat

and will ultimately lead us to quit.

As Jesus saw the approaching of the cross...

He did not say...I can’t do it...

It’s just to hard...But He said I am going,

I will persevere.

I am convinced that perseverance is a great prescription for curing self pity.

What if Jesus had not persevered but what if He had thought to have a pity party instead.

You say impossible!...unthinkable!...

Well fortunately for you and me Jesus loved us enough and did not take pity on Himself but on us instead and it lead Him to Calvary to the cross which purchased our salvation.

Turn to MT 4

I. Who is subject to self pity.?

Who might be tempted to self pity?....to have a pity party.

The truth is that everyone is subject to the temptation of self pity.

Music artist Neil Diamond sang a song called Song Sung Blue.

It said "song sung blue everybody knows one.

Song sung blue every garden grows one."

Certainly all of us could be tempted to sing the blues of our life...but in all truthfulness Jesus has given us much to sing a song of joy about instead.

Even still we see that Jesus was tempted in ways that certainly could have lead to self pity.

In Mt chapter 4 where Jesus was fasting for forty days and the Bible clearly says "he was hungry."

Look at MT 4:1

1Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil.

2After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry.

3The tempter came to him and said, "If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread."

4Jesus answered, "It is written: ’Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.

Friends I am a Baptist and I like eating..... and I am not very successful at dieting. I can tell you after 40 days without food I could see the temptation to feel sorry for oneself.

Yet Jesus doesn’t pity Himself ...why... look at verse

v 4 and see where His focus was . It was on God and God’s plan.

I think one of the things that will help us escape self pity is when we keep our focus on God and on His plan.

Turn over to LK chapter 23

Watch carefully and see where you see the pity in the situation of three who hung on crosses that day. Look to verse 36

36The soldiers also came up and mocked him. They offered him wine vinegar

37and said, "If you are the king of the Jews, save yourself." (No pitty for Jesus)

38There was a written notice above him, which read: THIS IS THE KING OF THE JEWS.

39One of the criminals who hung there hurled insults at him:

(No Pitty For Jesus)

"Aren’t you the Christ? Save yourself and us!"

40But the other criminal rebuked him. "Don’t you fear God," he said, "since you are under the same sentence?

41We are punished justly, for we are getting what our deeds deserve. But this man has done nothing wrong."

(An interesting thing here as one of the men could have been pittying himself on the cross he has pity for the fact that Jesus is dying a criminals death but yet Jesus is innocent.)

42Then he said, "Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.

43Jesus answered him, "I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise."

So we realize tonight that

All of us are subject to the temptation of self pity

but also we can understand that

II. ADVERSITY IS NOT MEANT TO LEAD US TO SELF PITY.

Turn to 2Cor 12

Paul was suffering something...something Excruciating that he called a thorn in the flesh.

What precisely it was ...we can’t be 100% certain some think it was malaria or failing eye sight, One preacher said it must have a difficult church member causing Paul such great suffering.

What ever it was ...it was troubling to Paul in so much that he asked God to remove it.

Yet Paul instead of throwing a pity party for his affliction.... learns to allow the adversity to bring him strength.

2 Cor Chapter 12

8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me.

9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

10That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Paul does not pull the covers over his head and say..."Goodbye cruel word" I can’t take the suffering. Instead we hear Paul saying I will commit my suffering to Christ in that He may be glorified through it and that I may know His power more completely.

The only way that I can explain a sense and a feeling that Christians have that suffering leads them to strength..That is a feeling unsaved people don’t understand...the most natural explanation I can give is that my soul though walking this earth is meant and created for another place.

Someone asked C.S. Lewis, "Why do the righteous suffer?"

"Why not?" he replied.

"They’re the only ones who can take it."

Perhaps no one faced challenging circumstances of life like Hellen Keller did.

And yet one of her greatest quotes is this

"Although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.

Adversity is not meant to make us weak and full of self pity

It is meant to broaden who we are and to heighten the strength we know in Christ.

A final thing we can learn is this.

Though God knows our weakness and our sinfulness

III. Turning to God in our temptation of self pity is our hope for deliverance

turn to Numb 11

Moses was God’s leader, He had a difficult job.

I want to tell you that seeking to be a leader for God’s people is not an easy task. Sometimes it leads pastors to pity parties that they should not have.

Pastors and leaders of God’s people for that matter....should not let the weight of leading God’s people drag them down to the depth of self pity but rather let God lift them up from the weight of their task.

Numb 11

10 Moses heard the people of every family wailing, each at the entrance to his tent. The LORD became exceedingly angry, and Moses was troubled.

11 He asked the LORD , "Why have you brought this trouble on your servant? What have I done to displease you that you put the burden of all these people on me?

12 Did I conceive all these people? Did I give them birth? Why do you tell me to carry them in my arms, as a nurse carries an infant, to the land you promised on oath to their forefathers?

13 Where can I get meat for all these people? They keep wailing to me, ’Give us meat to eat!’ 14 I cannot carry all these people by myself; the burden is too heavy for me.

15 If this is how you are going to treat me, put me to death right now-if I have found favor in your eyes-and do not let me face my own ruin."

Is Moses complaining?

It sounds to me as though he is complaining here.

Moses wasn’t a perfect man, by any means.

He was just human like the rest of those God calls to lead His people.

Yet Moses was mightily used of God.

This passage shows a a weak time in Moses’ life.

He said he would rather be dead than go through what he was going through trying to lead a bunch of people who were often obstinate and complaining and moaning and groaning.

Some things in ministry still remain the same even after ALL THESE YEARS

Moses let it get to him too much.

I know pastors who have had ulcers and have had nervous breakdowns.

I even know men who have left the ministry.

They did the same thing Moses did—complained to the Lord that the burden was too great.

They not only got tired of hearing the criticisms and the complaints and the whining and the difficulties but they let it defeat them..

Moses made a mistake in complaining to God. His comments indicate self pity.

Moses said that he was the one who was bearing all these people.

Moses truthfully wasn’t God was bearing them and also bearing Moses, but Moses was not fully lending himself and depending himself upon God.

So even though God is not pleased by self pity

God says, “All right, Moses, I’ll give you help if that is what you want.”

God very patiently, very graciously, provides some assistance for Moses. Seventy elders were appointed.

What Moses REALLY needed most was to fully and completely trust God in the task God had called him to.

This applies not just to pastors leading a congregation.

But it applies to that weary parent who is saying God my kids are out of control and I don’t want to be a parent anymore.

It applies to the Sunday School teacher who’s class seems disinterested

It applies to the person God has placed as a witness in a certain work place but they pity themself and say God I am the only Christian here and it is horrible for me.

The conclusion to this sermon and our response is clear:

We need to recognize

We all are capable of self pity.

We need to let adversity lead us to God and not lead us to whining complaining or quitting

If we sense that we are slipping into self pity...We can take rest in knowing that God will lift us up if the weight of pity begins to bring us down.

If only we let Him.