PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE (2 SAM 18:1-17)
I love sports. I took to soccer, ping-pong, and badminton in my younger days, and took up basketball and tennis in my thirties in America. There was no moving object I did not like. By the time I was 35, my knees couldn’t withstand the onslaught anymore. One morning my knees swelled up after a biking weekend and a Monday morning walk. After a day or two, the swelling went down but my knees lost its strength. I was reduced to walking; running was impossible.
Top orthopedic doctors couldn’t figure out what was wrong with my knees and legs. One doctor told me I was bowlegged, one said my patella tendon was injured and another said I had osteoarthritis. For a few years I was seeing a Chinese doctor twice a week for $35 a visit. Massage reduced the pain and the stiffness but I still had no strength. It deteriorated so badly that I couldn’t climb the stairs or bend down and rise up without help. However, MRI revealed that my knees, the joints and structure were normal.
In the summer of 2003 I joined a fitness center. Five or six days a week I spent over an hour to rehab my knees. I remember the difficulty of using the leg press to push a 30 lb weight. After I vacated my seat, a high school girl pushed effortlessly against 150 lbs! I asked her what a normal high school girl could do. She assured me she was a soccer player.
After 2 years I have accomplished my goal of pushing 150 pounds. On top of that, I would skip, run, or jump for a joint total of 1,000 times. My knees could hardly bend before; now I am doing two sets of 50 squats a day.
It’s much harder to recover what one has lost than to work hard at retaining it. An African proverb says, “Two good days do not dawn in a row.” Good days do not last long or forever. David had to adjust his attitude and lifestyle due to the passing of youth, the loss of health, and his fall from power. However, a lot of his problems – and ours, I might add, were due to his taking for granted what he had and doing nothing to improve his lot. He allowed things to get to a point where rescue and restoration were unlikely and recovery and rehab were barely possible. He would survive but things would not be the same.
HELP IS NOT HELP WITHOUT HEALTH
David mustered the men who were with him and appointed over them commanders of thousands and commanders of hundreds. 2 David sent the troops out-a third under the command of Joab, a third under Joab’s brother Abishai son of Zeruiah, and a third under Ittai the Gittite. The king told the troops, “I myself will surely march out with you.” 3 But the men said, “You must not go out; if we are forced to flee, they won’t care about us. Even if half of us die, they won’t care; but you are worth ten thousand of us. It would be better now for you to give us support from the city.” 4 The king answered, “I will do whatever seems best to you.” So the king stood beside the gate while all the men marched out in units of hundreds and of thousands.
A survey of more than 2,500 men and women aged 18 to 75 reported that older respondents were less likely than younger ones to fear aging, to think of growing older as something bad or say that the quality of life for the elderly has gotten worse in the last 20 years.
Two-thirds (66%) of those surveyed say old age begins at 70 or older. Among these, 28% consider someone old at age 80 and beyond. The good news is that 85% of people 65 to 75 are not afraid of getting old.
When asked their greatest worry about getting old, 35% of respondents express concerns about illness and failing health, followed by 31% who fear being unable to care for themselves and being dependent on others. 20% admitted their greatest worry is not having enough money.
What should give people more security as they age? Money was the No. 1 at 40%, followed by spouse (29%), children (12%), friends (5%), career (4%), or home (4%).
52% of women surveyed think they have to take care of their parents when they get older but only 41% of men think so. 48% say they would let their parents to choose whether to live with them or in a retirement home if their parents became unable to care for themselves (Parade magazine 12/12/93 “What They Say about Aging”).
The helpless figure of the aging David couldn’t be any sadder. The king was a pale resemblance of the young shepherd tending animals, the fearless general in battle, and the powerful king of Israel. Now he could only pine for and dream of glory days, yesterday once more, and those were the days. The muscles, the moves, and the majesty were gone. The spirit and swagger were there, but the strength was no longer there. The best he could do was to muster people, appoint them and dispatch them. Valor and voice were commendable, but pace and poise were missing.
David couldn’t stamp his authority or order people around anymore. When he was in his prime he could eat two hundred Philistines for lunch (1 Sam 18:27) without pausing or burping. Giants were like gnats to him then (1 Sam 17:4). Even if he wanted to, his men presently would not allow him to. In truth, he was a nuisance, a has-been - on the decline, past his prime, and in the way. No wonder citizens gravitated to his son Absalom.
David said. “I will surely march out with you.” The Hebrew uses the same word twice to intensify and emphasize things. The word “surely” is missing in the text but the word “march” is repeated. The Hebrew reading for “I will surely march with you” is “I will march, march with you.” David wanted to march the longest march, mingle with the boys, and match their every exploit and stride. He had no desire to be the inspirational or motivational leader or the figurehead or symbol; he wanted back the role of action hero – to hold his own, to feel the rush and to return to yesterday. But David’s presence strapped his men’s hands and feet, as the Chinese would say. He was a burden, a liability, and a distraction to his soldiers on the battlefield.
The advice did not come from one man or his generals, but from every soldier (v 3). Zeal, bravery, and passion were not enough. They did not see a last hurrah, a nimble figure, or a likely fight in him. They couldn’t afford a half-hearted king who was a total wreck, wimp and walkover around his son. The battle was a lost cause with David around. He couldn’t give it all that he had if he wanted to. Anything was better than wait, but wait he must - by the gate, for the news, and till someone returned with the outcome. Thankfully, the king resigned himself to following orders for a change.
HOME IS NOT HOME WITHOUT HEALING
5 The king commanded Joab, Abishai and Ittai, “Be gentle with the young man Absalom for my sake.” And all the troops heard the king giving orders concerning Absalom to each of the commanders. 6 The army marched into the field to fight Israel, and the battle took place in the forest of Ephraim. 7 There the army of Israel was defeated by David’s men, and the casualties that day were great-twenty thousand men. 8 The battle spread out over the whole countryside, and the forest claimed more lives that day than the sword. 9 Now Absalom happened to meet David’s men. He was riding his mule, and as the mule went under the thick branches of a large oak, Absalom’s head got caught in the tree. He was left hanging in midair, while the mule he was riding kept on going.
Even the most powerful people in the world run out of ideas when it comes to the family.
England Prime Minister Tony Blair’s problems with his then 16-year-old son Euan is a case in point. The teenager celebrated the end of his exams by getting drunk. Police officers subsequently arrested him. An ambulance was called for Euan, who was discovered vomiting on the pavement, but paramedics decided there was no need for the teenager to go to hospital. Instead, he was taken to the police station where he initially gave his name and an old address, and told officers he was 18. He was then searched and his true identity discovered.
In a speech the next day, Mr. Blair said, “Being a Prime Minister can be a tough job. Being a parent is probably tougher, and sometimes you don’t always succeed. But the family to me is more important than anything else.” http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/821720.stm
On the other side of the Atlantic, George Bush had headaches the size of Texas with his then 19-year-old twins. Jenna Bush pleaded no contest to a charge of being a minor in possession of alcohol, and must attend alcohol awareness classes, and was ordered to pay $51.25 in court costs, serve eight hours of community service and attend six hours of classes. Police said Bush was drinking beer but did not appear to be intoxicated. The legal drinking age in Texas is 21.
http://www.usatoday.com/news/washington/2001-05-16-jenna.htm
Two weeks after Jenna’s day in court, double trouble ensued. Police were called to the restaurant where Jenna and her twin, Barbara, allegedly tried to buy alcohol using someone else’s identification card. Barbara pleaded no contest. The judge ordered Barbara Bush to pay court fees of $100, serve eight hours of community service, and attend an alcohol awareness course.
http://edition.cnn.com/2001/LAW/07/06/jenna.court/
David couldn’t believe his ears either. His son was coming for his hide. Absalom did not behave anything like David’s son; he was a complete stranger to David. Sure, they were both beautiful people, but Absalom was not a people person. He had no friends, hated his father, and was all about himself. He inspired anger, rivalry and intolerance in people but not passion, loyalty, or tolerance like his father.
In fact, his son reminded David not of himself but of a familiar face from his past - his enemy Saul. Absalom was no less thirsty than Saul for David’s blood. Like Saul, Absalom wasn’t satisfied with sending his men to hunt David down. No, he had to see David dead for himself. He had to make sure his men did not hold back, think twice, or feel bad for the king – that their heart, hands and feet were not weak around the likable king. If nobody would volunteer and if at all possible, he wouldn’t mind landing the fatal blow, inflicting the mortal wound, and plunging the final sword, javelin, arrow, dagger or weapon into his father’s heart. How hurtful was that - your favorite son leading the charge, seeking your downfall, and wanting your head? The Cantonese say crudely, “Better a piece of BBQ pork than a son than that!”
True, Hushai, David’s trusted advisor who faked loyalty to Abslaom, gave the idea of leading the charge to capture David to Absalom (2 Sam 17:11-15), but Absalom was thrilled and beside himself, like a kid in the candy store and a graduate on his first job, with the thought of hunting his father down. David could not believe his son would really risk his life and everything else just to see him dead. Mostly, he did not know what to believe anymore. However, just in case, if the fool Absalom really came for him, David warned his men not kill his son.
Unlike his father, Absalom was more talker than fighter. In fact, he was not much of a fighter – the type of fighter that would not or could not get off his high mule. Driving, leading or taming the animal evaded him. His hair got in the way and his head got stuck. Nothing of the father’s training, skills, or abilities was in the son. The forest ate him up. He had no clue what he was doing, where he was going, and how to lead fighting. Absalom was a poor imitation of his father. When the going got tough, Absalom got going, running, and packing.
In truth, David knew little of his son’s thinking, temperament, and capabilities, and what made his son a classic angry, bitter young man. David had too many wives, children, and things to do.
HONOR IS NOT HONOR WITHOUT HONESTY
10 When one of the men saw this, he told Joab, “I just saw Absalom hanging in an oak tree.” 11 Joab said to the man who had told him this, “What! You saw him? Why didn’t you strike him to the ground right there? Then I would have had to give you ten shekels of silver and a warrior’s belt.” 12 But the man replied, “Even if a thousand shekels were weighed out into my hands, I would not lift my hand against the king’s son. In our hearing the king commanded you and Abishai and Ittai, ’Protect the young man Absalom for my sake.’ 13 And if I had put my life in jeopardy-and nothing is hidden from the king-you would have kept your distance from me.” 14 Joab said, “I’m not going to wait like this for you.” So he took three javelins in his hand and plunged them into Absalom’s heart while Absalom was still alive in the oak tree. 15 And ten of Joab’s armor-bearers surrounded Absalom, struck him and killed him. 16 Then Joab sounded the trumpet, and the troops stopped pursuing Israel, for Joab halted them. 17 They took Absalom, threw him into a big pit in the forest and piled up a large heap of rocks over him. Meanwhile, all the Israelites fled to their homes. 18 During his lifetime Absalom had taken a pillar and erected it in the King’s Valley as a monument to himself, for he thought, “I have no son to carry on the memory of my name.” He named the pillar after himself, and it is called Absalom’s Monument to this day. (2 Sam 18:1-18)
Several years ago, a frustrated furniture company attempted to collect some overdue bills from a customer with this threatening letter:
Dear Sir:
What would your friends and neighbors think if our truck pulled into your driveway some afternoon, and our men came into your house to pick up the items of furniture for which you have not paid us?
Shelby Furniture Company
Back came this prompt reply from the customer:
Gentlemen:
I have talked this over with my friends and neighbors and they all agree it would be a pretty lousy trick.
Henry Jones (Bits and Pieces 4/28/94)
David discovered his order did not carry weight as it used to. His general cut down his son like a dog. Joab treated David’s words like hot air, muttering wind or wind around the ear - nothing, according to the Chinese. The words pleaded “for my sake” (v 5), but his general treated the outcast king like he was non-existent, like he was senile, like the feeble, aged and outcast king he was.
The louder and more public David pleaded, the crueler Joab became and the worst death awaited Absalom. If Joab’s three javelins did not do the job, his ten armor-bearers finished it off, pummeling Absalom and making mincemeat and choking the life out of him. They then threw his lifeless body into a makeshift and an unmarked grave.
Joab was an out of control general David kept by his side. This was not the first time Joab had done things behind David’s back. He and his brother Abishai, out of personal vendetta, had murdered Abner, Saul’s general, without the knowledge or permission of David (2 Sam 3:30). He was the one who sent Uriah to his death (2 Sam 11:16). Joab also had a grudge and an old score to settle with Absalom, who, upon his return from exile in Geshur, set Joab’s fields on fire to force him to appeal to David to meet the son he had refused to see (2 Sam 14:32-33). Joab was the type that did dirty things for David but also dirty things to him.
Conclusion: Don’t wait to take action in your relationship with God, family, or people till you’re old, things worsen, and it’s hopeless. It’s been said, “Prevention is better than cure.” Ask the doctors. It is now the catchword in physical health. There comes a time when the body is weak, when the kids are willful and people are weary of you. You have no control over your health, your home and your helpers.
Victor Yap
http://epreaching.blogspot.com/
www.riversidecma.org
www.preachchrist.com (Chinese sermons)
