THE TOP PRIORITY FOR FAMILIES
EXODUS 20:1-3 & MATTHEW 6:33
INTRODUCTION OF SERIES:
We want to begin a new series today entitled, "Foundations For A Fulfilled Family.” What do you think of when you hear the phrase: "traditional family values." I have mixed feelings when I hear it. On one hand it’s good news because for decades we had been living in a values vacuum. From the 60’s moral free culture, where we basically said, "Anything goes," to the “Me Generation” of the 80’s we just kind of overlooked family values. And now in the new millennium we’ve discovered the fall-out. Listen to some of these statistics from the US bureau on Statistics about the 1990’s. Every 30 seconds there was a divorce in America. Every 4th child in America was born to an unwed mother. STD’s have reached medically defined epidemic proportions. 47% of all children in America now live in homes bearing the scars of personal divorce.
No wonder we have a call to, "We need to get back to family values." But here’s the other side that may not be good news. What exactly are “traditional family values”? Like the "Newsweek" magazine article some time ago by Joe Klein, which headlined the question: "Family Values? Whose Values?" What values are we going to accept? Just look at TV for example and ask that question. Whose family values are you going to implement? The Simpsons? The Bundy’s? The Barone’s? The Camden’s? You see it’s politically correct now and many want to say, “Let’s get back to family values,” but where are you going to find those values?
Well, I want us to go back in the past. But I want us to go back further than the values of the Cosby’s in the 90’s or the Brady Bunch in the 70’s, even further back than Ozzie & Harriet or Donna Reed. I want us to go back some 6000 years, where a perfect Father gave the original "Traditional family values." They are found in the Ten Commandments. And when you apply several of God’s "Top Ten" to families you can be assured that they have stood the test of time. These values have outlasted every fad of society. They are the bedrock of the western civilization. Jew, Muslim, Christian- all agree on their value.
So, for the next 5 weeks I want to study five of these time tested moral values that are “family friendly.” If you’ll listen carefully and implement them, I promise that you will fortify your family and give it the best chance for success. Deut. 6:6-7- "Always remember these commands I give you today. Teach them to your children.."(NCV) Notice two things: (1) Remember these commands.. Let me ask you, “How many of you believe you could name all Ten Commandments from memory?" You wouldn’t be alone. George Gallup’s book Surveying the Religious Landscape revealed that only 49% of all Protestants and only 44% of all Catholics could even name four of them. Now, obviously, if you don’t know them it’s certainly going to hard to live by them. God says, "Remember these commands." (2) Teach them to your children. In other words, pass them on. Do your children know these 10 values? They probably don’t know them any better than you do. God says, "these are important, remember them.. teach them." That’s why I want us to spend the next 5 weeks impressing these “Family-friendly Commands” upon our hearts and applying them to our homes, because our families desperately need some time tested, Godly, traditional family values. (PRAY)
INTRODUCTION OF SERMON:
Now, we begin with the top truth that all families should know and practice by studying the 1st commandment. The order of the Ten Commandments are not haphazard. God intentionally put this one first, because it is the most important. It is what the other 9 are built on. Let’s read it. "And God spoke all these words, `I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.’" And here is the first command. (Read together) "You shall have no other gods before me." You see, we’ve tried permissive parenting & "free love" and now our families are crumbling. Why? Because those things did not provide a stable foundation. The Bible asks in Psa. 11:3- "When the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?" Let’s begin by looking at God’s right to supremacy & our priority.
I. THE ASSERTION OF GOD’S SUPREMACY: Ex. 20:2
Would you please notice that this first command assumes the existence and reality of God. The Bible never attempts to prove that God is, it simply asserts that God is to have the top place. One theologian said, "The only real freedom a man has is to choose his own gods. After that his gods determine what he’s going to be." In other words, God desires and demands the primary place in our life. Notice notice that God asserts His supremacy. "I am the Lord your God who brought you our of Egypt.." Let’s take a minute to review the events that led up to this moment. Egypt held the Hebrews in slavery for 400 years. God chose a man by the name of Moses to declare to Pharaoh, King of Egypt that it was time to let them go. But Pharaoh needed the Hebrew slave labor so he denied the request of Moses and thus, the authority of God. So God sent a series of 10 plagues and forced Pharaoh to relent. God took the Israelites to His promised land and on the way delivered and protected them. He parted the Red Sea so they could cross, He provided bread for them to eat, He guided them with a pillar of fire by night & cloud by day. And now 3 months into their journey from Egypt, God, gave Moses these 10 laws that stipulated how He wanted the people to live & the Bible makes it very clear that these words are not man’s. "And God spoke all these words.." Here’s the priority from God. He said, "I am the God who delivered you from Egypt, I am the one who got you out of that slavery mess.” In other words: "I am responsible here, I am in charge, I have the right to tell you what to do."
Oh, how we need to hear that. Because many people today are saying, "Every person should have the right to believe what they want about God."-OR- "Let’s be tolerant. Sure we believe in God, but there are many paths to God. It’s okay if the Hindu have his god, or the Buddhist has his god, and the new-agers have their understanding of god. We shouldn’t be so narrow as to force our views of God on others. After all, truth is what is true for you." Well, if that is the way you think, please understand that holding that position directly contradicts the God of the universe. The Bible doesn’t teach tolerance it teaches obedience. Jesus said in John 14: "If you have seen me, you have seen God and no man comes to the Father but by Me." In other words, if you don’t believe in Jesus and do things His way, you can’t get to God. Pretty intolerant? Well, maybe the next time we create the universe we can set the rules for it. Psa 115:3- "For our God is in the heavens, and he does whatever he wishes." (NLT)
But it’s not really intolerant. Let’s say there are 3 brothers who lose their parents and are adopted as children into three different homes. They meet later and one says, "You know, I’ve done some research and I’ve found that our parents once lived in LA." The 2nd one says, "No, I’ve looked into this and I’ve found that our parents resided in N.Y." The 3rd one says, "Your both wrong. I know as a fact that our parents always lived in Miami." Would they part and just say, "Well, that’s okay. You have your concept of who your parents are and I have mine." Of coarse, not. We all know there can only be one set of parents and it would be really important, especially if there is an inheritance, that they knew who & where they are! Now, if God is real, can we really be casual about His identity? If we care about people and the truth we cannot be content if others live in ignorance. That may seem narrow and intolerant, but actually it is a matter of truth and compassion. Because there is an inheritance available, eternal life for those who accept Him. To nonchalantly say, "Well, let everybody have their own god," or "believe what they want," demonstrates a lack of knowledge of God’s Word & a lack of compassion for people.
And if you really believe in God then it is vital that you understand He demands single-minded allegiance. This foundational command tells us to rid ourselves of anything that would be in competition to Him, to reject all rivals. We are to have no other gods before Him because there is only one real God. Did you notice in Ex. 20 when God talks about other gods He uses a little "g"? What is a small "g" god? A god is anything that is a top priority in your life. Can a career be a god? Can another person be a god? Can sports or leisure be a god? Yes, even the good things that God has created for us to enjoy can become “g”ods when we make them more important than Him. So, the priority from God is that He has supremacy over all.. The principle for man and our families is that we must reject any rivalry and put God first.
But God never gives a principle that is a must without giving us a promise. The promise, in this case, from God to man is that if we’ll put Him first then He will take care of us. Prov. 3:5-6- "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths."(NLT) Jesus in our Matthew passage that we’ve printed for you basically says the same thing. "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." That verse concludes an entire context on physical and spiritual needs. The promise of God is that i you’ll put Him first then He’ll give you what He knows you need. No don’t misunderstand.. Not what you want. He doesn’t necessarily promise that physical blessings are going to overwhelm you. But He promises to supply your needs according to His Will & give spiritual blessings beyond measure. So God asserts His supremacy, thus giving the foundation for a fulfilled family. Put God First and He will give you and your family direction and blessing.
II. THE QUESTION OF OUR PRIORITY: MATTHEW 6:33
Now, telling you that putting God first is the foundation is easy but if you’re like me, you’d like some help, some practical counsel on how to accomplish it. Because God saying “Put Me first” is easy to understand in principle but much harder to put into practice. Let me ask you.. How hard is it to button a shirt wrong? Not very hard. All you have to do is get the 1st button wrong and the whole shirt is cock-eyed. And it’s not hard to get your life out of kilter, just get the first priority wrong and the rest will be messed up. So, how do we put God first? Is there a plan we can look at to help us? How do I go about showing my children that God is first? How do I make sure that my spouse and I are practically living out this foundational truth?
I want to suggest 5 very practical things to do to put Him first. Let’s use the anachronism F.I.R.S.T. to help us remember how to do this. Here are 5 ways to put God first in your family. And if you’re single you still need this because it is the key to successful living & having healthy relationships with God and with other people.
(1) "F" - Put God first in your Finances. You know money may be the #1 test of your priorities. Jesus knew how difficult this was for us, that’s why 2/3 of His parables are about possessions. How you spend your money says a lot about your spiritual life. I’d like all of you, right now, to get out your checkbook and pass them to the person on the right of you. (Just kidding.. some nervous laughter!) But if you were to do that what would your checkbook reveal about the priorities of your life to that person? By simply looking at how you spend your money, that person, who may or may not know you, can tell a lot about what is first in your life. So, let’s just go ahead and start with the hardest one first. Put God first in your finances.
How does the Lord want me to give? Prov. 3:9- "Honor the Lord with your wealth by giving Him the first part (some versions says "firstfruits") of all your income.." (LB) God says, "You give me the first part of your income, not the left overs but give to Me right off the top." So when you sit down to write those checks for your bills, make the first check out to Him. Some of you are thinking, "Okay, I can do that, but what I really want to know is how much I’m making out that first check for?” Well, in the O.T. God told the Israelites to give 10% of their income. It is what is called a tithe =10%. Why did God pick that figure? I don’t know. I mean everything is His to begin with so He could of asked for 25% or 50% or He could of said, "You give me 90% and live off of 10." Instead He said, "Give 10 and live off of 90." But what was the purpose of tithing? Deut. 14:23- "The purpose of tithing is to teach you always to put God first in your lives." (LB) God says, "Give me the first 10% and that will help teach you to put Me first."
Now, in the NT God does not mention the exact amount He wants. In the N.T. He simply says, "Give generously and graciously." 2 Cor. 9:6-7 tells us to be generous in our giving and to do it with a cheerful heart. I cannot give you any clearer spiritual advice, whether you are in good financial condition or tough money straights, then to say to you "Put God first in your finances." You see, I don’t care what you say is first, if you are not giving generously back to God off the top of your income then you’ve got to question if God is really first in your life, are you really, really trusting Him?
(2) "I"- Put God first in your interests. What does that mean? That means my leisure time, hobbies, things you enjoy. Let me ask you, “What excites you?” I mean what is it that, as one youth minister says, “rev’s you up?” Where does God place in what excites you? 1 Cor. 10:31 says: ".. whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." “Whatever you do..”Does that include going on vacation? Does that include hunting? Shopping? Yes.. Does that mean going to a ball game? Yes. I watch a lot of basketball and I see people excited.. Then I watch people in church and by their demeanor and countenance it wouldn’t be too hard to determine what is more exciting to them. How do I do “all” for the glory of God? By putting Him first. How?
Well, one way is to do all things with an attitude of gratitude. You’re out playing tennis? You say, "God, thank You for giving me an arm to hold the racquet, for giving me enough hand-eye coordination to hit the ball. Because I would not have had any of those things if it were not for You." Another way is simply place what excites you before the Lord. Ask Him, “Lord, am I more excited by something You’ve given me, than You?” Our families need to see us putting Him ahead of our interests. “In all you do, do it to the glory of God.”
(3) "R"- Put God first in your relationships. Let me put this to you bluntly. If you are desiring to put God first in your life then you need to be wise in who you choose to relate to. 2 Cor. 6:14 tells us: "Don’t be teamed with those who do not love the Lord." (LB) The word "teamed" there was the word for using animals at the plow. You wouldn’t yoke an oxen and a donkey together because they don’t work together well due to not having the same temperaments. What kind of “teaming” is God talking about? I can think of at least 3 categories.
(1) Put God first in who you date and especially who you marry. God is telling you not to give your heart to someone who does not share the same intensity for Jesus as you do. Because you could lose your heart and be pulling in different directions the rest of your life. There are many that can share with you the downside of being teamed up with someone with whom they are not in spiritual synch.
(2) Be careful of who you choose as close friends. I’ve listed some Scriptures for your under "choose your relationships carefully." They make the point that your friends will either enhance your relationship to Christ or drag it down. Your friends are the ones you listen too and if they are not putting God first, you’re may get some bad advice. Let me, under this category include business partners too. If you team up with someone who doesn’t hold the same commitment to God you do, you will find yourself in a constant tug of war in what values to use to run your business.
(3)Is for parents. Let me ask you. Who or what type of people are you exposing your children to? What are the values of those that you invite into your home? If you want to build a strong family you should be inviting people over and chumming with those who provide Godly role models for them. They need to see, "this is what people are like who are putting God first in their lives." By the way that’s why you should get involved in small groups within the church (call Bob) so that you can develop some of those faithful companions. Put God first in your relationships.
(4) “S”- Put God first in your schedule. You do that in a couple of ways. You give Him the first minutes of the day. Mark 1:35- "Very early in the morning.. Jesus got up and went off to a solitary place to pray." If Jesus needed it, don’t you think we might too? Spend the first minutes of your day reading your Bible and in prayer. It doesn’t have to be long, just long enough to give the day to God and remind yourself that He gets first place in your life. If you can’t handle the morning, then choose another time during the day. On your way to work turn off the radio, tape or CD player and talk to God. Or drive to work early, sit and pray and read your Bible in the parking lot. Take your Bible to lunch. After the kids are in bed and before you turn on the tube, take 5 minutes to check in with God. It’s not as important when you do it as that you do it.
Another way to put Him first in your schedule is to make a "To Do" list and then pray: "God, which ones of these do You want me to get done today? Would you give me wisdom in ranking my tasks by Your priority?" Would you agree that you don’t seem to have time to get everything done? If you’re like me you’ve got 20 things to do and they all take 2 hours. But listen, you have just enough time to do God’s will. God will never put more on you than He does in you. He’ll give you the time to get the things He wants done, done. Ask Him what He would have you do. Psa. 90:12- "Teach us to number our days and recognize how few they are; help us to spend them as we should."
And the way to put God first for family in scheduling is to make sure you give God the priority of meeting Him and others by being in church, regardless. Don’t rationalize it away and say, "Well, we`re on vacation and don’t know where a Church is," Find one.. -OR- “I’m tired this morning," yet you go to work feeling the same way. When your children see you do that they learn a lesson alright, they learn that leisure, or work or whatever is more important than God. And by the way, at least pray aloud at every meal with your family. I know that scares some of you. But you don’t have to say any fancy words. Just say, "God, I’m hungry and I know You’ve provided this. Thanks." It is a visual demonstration to your kids that God is first.
(5) "T"- Put Him first in your troubles. When you face unexpected problems and pressures who do you turn to? "Who you gonna call?" 911, Ghost Busters, Miss Cleo? God says, "Turn to Me first when you have a problem." Quite frankly, for a lot of people, prayer is a last resort rather than a 1st option. You hear: "I guess all we can do is pray?" Like, "Man this is really hopeless. I’m all the way down to prayer." NO... Go to God first!
Let me ask you. Do you trust Him? Really? Do you worry? If you do then you don’t trust Him. Jesus said, "Do not worry." No qualifiers, no "ifs, ands or buts," just "Don’t worry." Rick Warren says, "Worry is the warning light that God is really not first in my life at this particular moment." Because worry says that God is not big enough to handle my troubles. Jesus says in Mt. 6:33: "Set your heart first on God’s kingdom and His goodness.." And He said that at the conclusion of an entire sermon on worry. The antidote to worry? Put God first! When God is first in all the 5 areas that we have discussed then I don’t worry because I can say in any of those areas where I may be having trouble.. "God, You’re in charge. I’ve done what I can, I’m giving it to you." And you can breathe easier because He’ll handle all your troubles. Psa. 46:1- "God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble." The secret of a fulfilled life and for the foundation for a fulfilled family starts right here.. Put God first.
Several years ago when Marlo & Rusty were in grade school they asked for their first permission to ride their bikes to school. But we wondered how important it was to them. So, we impressed upon them that if it was important to them to ride bikes it was important enough to get up early and not doddle. We all agreed that Friday was to be the big day. On that Thurs. night before Deb and I went out and Deb’s mother baby-sat. When we got home Mom said, "Do you let your kids sleep in their clothes?" We thought she meant they were sleeping in my T-Shirts but when we checked they were fully clothed for school - Shirts, shorts, socks and shoes! They had decided that they were not going to be late so they took the action that would help them do the thing that was the most important to them - no chance that they wouldn’t be up early enough to ride their bikes.
Let me ask you.. “What actions demonstrate what your priorities are in life?” If you stood before God this morning could He say, "You’ve had no other gods besides me- I was first in the life of your family and I was first in every aspect of your heart." There are some of you here this morning that need to demonstrate your priorities by putting Him first in that decision that you know He wants you to make. PRAY..
Prayer:
Father, I want to thank-you for your clear truth today about how You want all of us to put You first. It said it very plainly and very simply. And I thank You too because You said that not out of some “ego-trip” but because You created us and know that when we put You first that it is then that we have the best life here and the promise of an even better life to come.
Father, I lovingly lift up to You those today who need to place you first in their hearts by receiving Your Son as Savior and Lord. May they see Jesus as the Way, the Truth and the Life.. A person who died for them so that they may have life with You.
And I pray for our families, Lord. We live in a world that competes for our hearts; that attempts to have us place so many things as “firsts” in our homes, our relationships. May we make a commitment today like Joshua did of old when he said, “As for me and my family, we will serve the Lord.” To say today: You will be first.. first in my heart.” And then Lord help us to do our best to show our mates, our kids, our friends how wonderful it is when you sit on the throne of our hearts.. When we have no other “g”ods before You! May we place You, Your kingdom and what You say as right at the top of our priorities..
We pray all of this in the name of the One who You placed as first.. the One whose name is above all names and all things and who is our all in all.. Jesus Christ.. Amen.
