Summary: The importance of authentic prayer and fasting in growing in relationship with God

(adapted from Southeast Christian Church’s series: “Living a Life of Integrity”)

SERIES: “WORDS OF WISDOM FOR KINGDOM LIVING”

TEXT: MATTHEW 6:5-18

TITLE: “EXAMINE YOUR MOTIVES”

INTRODUCTION: A. I recently ran across a letter written by a father who wanted to apologize to a certain

young man for not allowing him to marry his daughter:

Dear Marty,

I have been unable to sleep since I broke off your engagement to my daughter. Will you please

forgive and forget?

I was much too sensitive about your Mohawk haircut, tattoos and pierced nose. I now realize

motorcycles aren’t really that dangerous, and I really should not have reacted that way to the

fact that you have never held a job.

I am also very sure that some other very nice people live under the bridge in the park, too. Sure

my daughter is only 18 and wants to marry you instead of going to Harvard on full

scholarship. After all, you can’t learn everything about life from books.

I sometimes forget how backward I can be. I was wrong. I was a fool. I have now come to my

senses and you have my full blessing to marry my daughter.

Sincerely,

Your future father-in-law.

P.S. Congratulations on winning the lottery!

B. Last week, we started looking at the section in the Sermon on the Mount where Jesus challenges

us to be sure that we what we do with honesty and sincerity.

--That we should do what we do in order to gain God’s approval instead of prestige and approval

from other human beings

1. We looked at Mt. 6:1-4 last week

--This week we continue with vss. 5-18

2. Jesus raises the main question: “Who is your audience?”

a. Are you motivated by the approval of men or the applause of God?

b. The title of this morning’s message: EXAMINE YOUR MOTIVES

3. Jesus starts the whole section with this statement in Mt. 6:1 – ““Be careful not to do your

‘acts of righteousness’ before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no

reward from your Father in heaven.”

C. In our passage this morning, Jesus warns us against praying to impress others.

--He challenges us to pray with sincerity. Jesus says, “Pray to be heard by God, not to

be seen by others.”

1. Remember that the Sermon on the Mount is Jesus’ instruction for those who would

claim to be Christ- followers.

--If you’re going to claim Him as your King, you need to live according to the

principles of His Kingdom

2. Kingdom living is righteous living

a. In Matthew chapter 6 Jesus teaches us that living a righteous life is not just a

matter of what we do, but also involves why we do it.

b. Jesus is not just concerned with us doing the right things, he wants us do the

right things for the right reasons.

--For Him the “why” is just as important as the “what”.

3. Kingdom-living is motivated by seeking God’s approval.

a. In Matthew 6 Jesus gives at least 3 areas where we need to examine our motives

to make sure we’re a living to express love to God, not to impress others.

b. Last week we looked at the first one: giving

c. This week, we’re going to look at the other two: Jesus teaches us to pray and

fast with the proper motivation.

I. AUTHENTIC PRAYER IS PRACTICED IN PRIVATE (NOT PERFORMED IN PUBLIC)

--Mt. 6:5-6 – “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the

synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward

in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen.

Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”

A. Notice that Jesus talks about praying the same way He talks about giving

1. He says, “WHEN you pray…” not “IF you pray…”

2. Jesus expects that those who claim to be Christ-followers will practice an authentic prayer life

B. Jesus warns against prayer that is motivated by public recognition and a desire to impress others.

1. Don’t misunderstand: The problem is not praying in public, it’s praying in public to be seen and

noticed by other people.

2. If we’re not making time to talk to him privately, then we shouldn’t be praying publicly.

a. If you pray in pubic when you don’t pray privately people might think you have a great prayer life.

b. Jesus says that particular practice is hypocritical.

1). Remember from last week: a hypocrite was an actor who changed roles by changing masks

2). In its biblical application, it’s pretending to be someone in public that you are not in private.

C. We need to be careful that our acts of righteousness do not become just a show

--Prayer can become a performance

1. One commentator said, “I believe that not one prayer in a hundred of those that fill our churches on a Sunday

morning is actually made to Almighty God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. They are made to men or to the

praying one himself.”

2. I’ve been in situations where I’ve been with a group of people gathered for prayer. We’d sit or

stand in a circle, take prayer requests, hold hands, and we’d then go around the circle with everyone

offering prayer for the needs requested and for other “felt” needs. There’s nothing wrong with this

particular method of group prayer. I think it many cases it’s a great way to have group prayer but there

have also been times that I’ve felt I was in some sort of “prayer competition”.

If I was toward the end of the circular prayers, I was too busy trying to figure out what I was going

to pray and hardly heard the prayers of the others in the group. Sometimes you get a person in the

group who is extremely articulate at prayer. Sometimes I was worried how I’d sound when it came my

turn.

3. Jesus saw how easy it is for us to begin trying to win some sort of prayer competition; even going so

far as to pray publicly in such a way that others can see how well WE pray!

II. AUTHENTIC PRAYER IS BASED ON A LOVING RELATIONSHIP (NOT A LIFELESS RITUAL)

--Mt. 6:7-8 – “And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard

because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask

him.”

A. Jesus is reminding us of the purpose of prayer

1. The purpose of praying is to connect and communicate with God so our relationship with Him grows.

2. Too many churches just mindlessly go through rituals because they think that is what they are

supposed to do.

--Anything authentic in our prayers is based on a relationship with God

3. Prayer becomes a ritual when we simply recite a memorized formula and when we slip into repetition.

--Sometimes we recite ritualistically and repetitiously because we just want to get it over with

B. Authentic prayer can be made hypocritical by just praying because it’s an obligation

1. A foursome of golfers was on the green at the 11th hole. Down on the road, a funeral procession of

cars passed by on the way from the funeral home to the cemetery. One of the guys in the foursome

whose name was Larry took off his hat, stood at attention, and had a somber look on his face as he

watched the procession go by.

The other three guys look stunned. After the funeral procession was out of sight, one the of the

guys asked, “Larry, I didn’t know you were so respectful of the dead.” Larry said, “Well, I felt kind

of obligated. After all, we would have been married for 37 years here in another month.”

2. When we pray out of obligation, we’re missing out on the kind of relationship that God wants to have

with us.

C. Starting in vs. 9, Jesus gives us what we call “The Lord’s Prayer”

1. Actually this prayer should be called the Disciples Prayer or the Model Prayer

2. What’s ironic is that many people quote this prayer mechanically in vain repetition.

--They do it out of ritual or obligation and they negate the relationship that God wants

3. Please pay attention that there is not a command against praying these particular words privately or

corporately

--Communal prayers were not unusual in Jesus’ day

a. Many of the Jewish people recited what they called the Eighteen Benedictions and they prayed

at given times of the day: 9:00 a.m., 12:00 p.m., and 3:00 p.m.

b. The Qumran community (the Jewish group that gave us the Dead Sea scrolls) had numerous

communal hymns and prayers

4. Understand that Jesus wasn’t necessarily placing a ban on communal prayers

--Remember that the early church as seen in Acts was known for their intense times of corporate

praying

a. However, He did recognize that we have a tendency to engage in form rather than function

b. We become more engaged with ritualistic and repetitious formulas and forget that prayer is about

relationship

D. What we call the Lord’s Prayer is in reality a model to follow and not just a prayer to repeat

--Mt. 6:9a – “This, then, is how you should pray…”

1. He didn’t say, “Pray these words…”

--He was saying, “Pray in this manner…”

2. Authentic prayer is a privilege; not an obligation

--It recognizes God as a loving Father who delights in relationship with us and delights in meeting

our needs

3. You don’t just have to repeat this model prayer to fall into routine

--Robert Cook: “All of us have one routine prayer in our system; and once we get rid of it, then we

really start to pray.”

a. Have you ever found yourself sometimes praying and then realizing when you were done, you

really have no idea what you had just said?

--I know that I have

b. Sadly, I think we have lost the idea of intimate relationship with God when we just go through the

motions

c. Tony Campolo used to use the illustration of his then teenage son. He would ask his audience

how they think he would feel if his son came to him and droned on in this fashion: “O thou who

dost clothe me and feed me, who provideth shelter and a place to rest; I beseech thee: Lend me

the car.”

Campolo said that if his son ever did something like that, he would probably smack him in the

head. This was a father-son relationship. Campolo told that he expected intimacy in that

relationship; not high sounding words.

3. Billy Graham: “Prayer is a simple two-way conversation between you and God. It is not the body’s

posture but the heart’s attitude that counts when we pray. Prayer is not our using of God; it more

often puts us in a position where God can use us."

III. AUTHENTIC PRAYER EXALTS GOD (INSTEAD OF ELEVATING US)

--Hypocritical prayers are about exalting self and putting on a public show.

A. Let’s pay close attention to the words of this model prayer

--Mt. 6:9-13 – “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done

on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts, as we also have

forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.”

1. Some translations add words that are referred to as a doxology (words of praise): “for yours is the

kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.”

2. The oldest manuscripts don’t include these words

a. The first time they’re recorded with this model prayeris in a document called The Didache

b. Didache simply means “teaching”

--It came about somewhere around 130 A.D. or shortly after and contained summarized New

Testament teaching for use in instructing new Christians

c. The important thing is that it doesn’t matter if we use these words because they are correct and

honor God which is the purpose of this model prayer

d. So let’s honor God this morning by looking at the elements of this model prayer:

B. It begins with “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name.”

--One little kid prayed, “Our father who art in Heaven, Howard be thy name.”

1. What does that word Hallowed mean?

a. Literally it means to be holy.

b. That’s simply saying, “God I worship you. You are worthy of my worship.”

c. There is none like Him, and no one has the authority He possesses.

3. We’re invited into the presence of this Holy Father because of what Jesus did for us on the cross

a. Heb. 4:14 –16 talks about what Jesus did and how He know provides the way for us to come to the

Father. Because of Jesus then in vs. 16, it says, “Let us then approach the throne of grace with

confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

b. Rom. 8:15 – For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received

the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.”

--“Abba” is an Aramaic term of intimacy; like our word “Daddy”

C. The next phrase is “Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.”

1. It’s a statement of priorities

--In it we say, “God I’m committed to You and Your will.”

2. The purpose of the Lords prayer is to glorify God’s name and to ask for help in accomplishing His

will on this earth.

a. Prayer needs to begin with God’s interests not ours.

b. David Jeremiah: “The Bible teaches that if you are a Christian, the kingdom of God is within you;

the King has come to live within your heart. So when you pray, Thy kingdom come you are

saying, ‘God you are the King. You live in my heart and I want your kingdom principles

and purposes to be lived out within my life.’”

3. It’s been said that prayer is a mighty instrument not in getting man’s will done in heaven but getting

God’s will done on earth.

D. The next part of the prayer, “Give us today our daily bread.”

1. In authentic prayer we say several important things

a. God, I need You

b. God, I’m going to completely trust in You for my needs

c. God, I’m going to trust in You on a daily basis

2. Why should we ask God for a daily provision of our needs?

--For the purpose of serving and glorifying Him

E. Then Jesus says to pray: “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors,”

1. Drawing closer to God also means growing closer to others

a. When Jesus gave us the model to pray, “Our Father,” He wasn’t just referring to you and Him

--“Our Father” recognizes others who are in the kingdom of God

b. Here we’re praying about personal relationships

2. God hates unforgiveness.

--Do you know why?

a. When we refuse to forgive we display a stunning lack of gratitude.

--He has forgiven us even though we don’t deserve it and He asks us to do the same thing

b. Jesus warns us in Mt. 6:14-15 – “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly

Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive

your sins.”

1). Kingdom living involves forgiving other people as well as having God forgive us

2). Lord Herbert: “He who cannot forgive others, breaks the bridge over which he himself must

someday pass.”

E. Jesus then says we’re to pray: “Lead us not into temptation., but deliver us from the evil one.”

1. 1 Peter 5:8 – Be selfcontrolled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion

looking for someone to devour.

a. Since the beginning of time, Satan has desired to lead us astray

--He wants to lead as many people as possible away from relationship with the heavenly Father

b. In Eph. 6, Paul warns us about the spiritual warfare and the wiles of the Devil

--Satan wants to destroy us

2. However, there’s a beautiful promise in 1 Cor. 10:13 – No temptation has seized you except what is

common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But

when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

a. God wants us to seek His will and guidance

b. He wants us to be aware that Satan is looking to trap us

c. But if we’ll trust in the Father, His Spirit will show us how to avoid the Devil’s traps and schemes

IV. AUTHENTIC FASTING BUILDS A CLOSER RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD (INSTEAD OF

MAKING US LOOK MORE HOLY)

--Mt. 6:16-18 – “When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to

show men they are fasting. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast,

put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to men that you are fasting, but

only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”

A. Jesus turns from the subject of prayer to a subject most Christians just ignore

1. Most people are very surprised to find that there are more than 74 separate references to fasting in the

Bible.

2. It’s never associated with weight loss, or as a hunger strike to be used for political purposes.

--Fasting is the practice of abstaining from something we like in order to grow spiritually.

a. Fasting is a sacrifice to God and a personal tool for relationship growth.

b. It’s a tool that when coupled with prayer is powerful.

B. But just like the hypocrites giving and praying for public approval and popularity, evidently some of

them were fasting so people would notice them.

1. The only fast God actually required of the Jewish people was on the annual Day of Atonement.

2. But the Pharisees practiced fasting two days a week (usually Mondays and Thursdays) and did so in

such a way that people know they were fasting.

a. They’d make their faces look pale and they’d put ashes on their head,

b. People would say, “You don’t look well.”

--Their response would go something like this, “Oh, I’m okay; sometimes I look a little piqued

when I fast for so long.”

c. They wanted people to put them on a pedestal of piety

--Jesus just shakes his head and says, they’ve received their reward -- the attention of men.

d. True fasting revolves around intimacy with God.

C. Even though the Pharisees fasted for the wrong reasons, Jesus speaks about it because when done

authentically, it can be a beneficial practice to grow closer in our relationship with God

1. Please notice that Jesus taught that fasting should be a regular practice for those who claim to be

Christ-followers

--Like giving and praying, Jesus says “when” you do it not “if” you do it

2. Everyone can fast to some extent

--If you have medical reasons such as diabetes to not fast from food, you can fast from TV or

anything else that gives you pleasure so that you can work on your relationship with God

3. When you do it, look normal and behave in a normal fashion

--You don’t have to pray all day when you fast. Just carry on with your daily work and use the

normal meal and snack times for prayer.

a. You may need to alert those who need to know such as those who prepare meals but otherwise

keep fasting in private.

b. The results of fasting make it enjoyable.

--When you feel the intimacy with God and see prayers answered and understand God’s will in a

deeper way, you’ll know that the discipline is worthwhile

c. We all should take time from something else to spend it in developing a relationship that will last through all eternity with our heavenly Father who loves us.

CONCLUSION: A. Fred Craddock is one of the Restoration Movement’s best known teachers of

preaching. He tells about a time when he and his wife were vacation in Tennessee.

They were having dinner in a restaurant when an old man started talking to them. He

was a friendly old fellow and asked Fred what he did for a living. Fred replied that he

was a preacher (thinking this might be the chance to get rid of him).

The old fellow said, “A preacher? That’s great. Let me tell you a story about a

preacher.” He explained that he was born not knowing who his father was which was a

source of great shame in a small town in the early twentieth century.

One day a new preacher came to the local church and the old fellow said that as a

youngster, he’d never gone to church. One Sunday, he decided to go hear this new

preacher. He was good and he went back again and again. He started attending just

about every week. However, the shame of not knowing his father went with him. He

would always arrive late and leave early in order to avoid talking to anyone.

One Sunday he got so caught up in the sermon that he forgot to leave. Before he

knew it the service was over, the people were filing out of the pews and he rushed to get

past them and out the door. As he did, he felt a heavy hand land on his shoulder. He

turned to see the preacher, a big tall man, looking down at him and asking, “What’s your

name, boy? Whose son are you?”

The little boy died inside. The very thing he wanted to avoid was now here. But

before he could say anything, the preacher said, “I know who you are. I know who your

family is. There’s a distinct family resemblance. Why, you’re a son of God!”

The old man sitting at the Craddocks’ table said “You know, mister, those words

changed my life.” And with that he got up and left.

When the waitress came over she said to Fred and his wife, “Do you know who that

was?” “No,” they replied. “That was Ben Hooper, the two-term governor of

Tennessee.”

B. We’ve seen today that God’s relationship to us is like a father, and the Bible says that we

can know God as a Father when we claim Jesus Christ as our Savior.

--Knowing for sure that God wants to be in a Father-child relationship with you and

living in that relationship through the work of His Son Jesus and the power of His Spirit

will certainly change your life.