Coasting
Wildwind Community Church
David Flowers
June 26, 2005
I need today to be a time of repentance, not where I demand that you repent of things, but where I repent to you, and confess to you some areas where I have not been as faithful as I need to be. Those of us entrusted to guard the fold, so to speak, to maintain the integrity of the church, to keep others focused on God – who makes sure WE stay focused on God? Have you ever thought about that? Honestly, how would you know if I wasn’t reading my Bible? How would you know if I stopped praying? What keeps me from coasting for long periods of time?
The answer: nothing does. And that’s what I need to repent for this morning. Because sometimes I just coast, don’t you? Sometimes I just get by. I make sure that the things I’m going to be asked about are the things that get done. And no one ever asks how I’m doing with prayer, with Bible study – with the things that are most important about pastoring a church and living as a Christian leader.
You know, people ask me a LOT of questions at this church. I get emails all the time with questions that range from, “Did you tell so and so about such and such,” to “How was your trip to Tulsa” to “Can I serve in this ministry,” to “Did we collect the money we need to keep operating this week” to “Where’s my CD order,” to “How do I talk to my friends about God.” But since the day we started Wildwind, I don’t think anyone has ever asked me: “Dave, how is your relationship with God?” In other words, “Dave, are you growing, are you becoming who God wants you to be, are you praying and listening to God.” I don’t know that I have ever asked you to hold me accountable for keeping the main thing the main thing, but the truth is that I always envisioned a church where that would happen – where people would see themselves as being in need of a pastor who would really speak the truth to them (even when it hurts), and would understand the pastor not as some aloof authority figure removed from the struggles and difficulties of the real world, but simply as one human being who happens to have been given the task of helping to guide the rest of the church. I think it would be nice to know that we are all in agreement that if the pastor of this church doesn’t stay focused spiritually, nothing else we might accomplish really matters. Do you believe that? I do. And folks what that means is I need you to help me.
I need you to expect me to stay on track, and I need to know that once in a while someone might ask. This world offers many distractions, and the ministry itself will keep a person busy enough that they might never get around to taking the time to pray and read the Bible and seek God. That seems ridiculous to people who are not in full-time ministry, I know, but it’s true. Paul, the greatest pastor ever, understood that when he wrote:
1 Corinthians 9:26-27 (MSG)
26 I don’t know about you, but I’m running hard for the finish line. I’m giving it everything I’ve got. No sloppy living for me!
27 I’m staying alert and in top condition. I’m not going to get caught napping, telling everyone else all about it and then missing out myself.
Every pastor, every Christian leader, needs to be aware of that possibility – that we can earnestly teach what we truly believe, and really lead people along right paths, and yet live sloppy lives personally. I think lately I have lived too sloppily.
I think the devil would love nothing more than to have churches full of well-intentioned pastors who are saying good and true things, but living sloppy lives – who are so busy doing ministry that they aren’t really serving God from hearts full of his presence. Spiritual leaders who are coasting = churches full of busy pastors and people that are working without the real power of God. I don’t want us to be like that, do you?
It seems lately I’m finding it harder than ever before to discipline myself to pray, to read God’s Word, to listen for His quiet voice in my life and I think that’s because I have never had such a huge variety of other things competing for my attention – and all this at a time when it has never been more important that I keep focusing my life on God – the one thing that gives meaning to all this. What I’m doing is confessing to you, apologizing and asking your forgiveness and for your help. But I’m also holding a mirror up to you for you to look into.
Do you see yourself in that mirror? Have you allowed your work to get in the way of your pursuit of God? Have you allowed money, or promotions, or family, or power, or even ministry – to come between you and God? My friends, if that has happened in your life, there is only one person responsible, and in order to see that person clearly you’ll have to hold that mirror a little closer. Life is complex and difficult and we all coast sometimes – but I’m here to call you back, because I believe that whether you want me to or not right now, it is your deepest need.
I’m no spiritual giant, but I do have to repent – before you and before God – today for letting my love for God grow cold – for coasting. I have to repent for the dry spells I have so often, when you’re probably thinking everything is groovy. And though I have never claimed to be perfect, I need you to help me to be better. I need you to expect me to be better, because folks I sure as heck expect that of you. Frankly I think we all need each other to help one another be better. That’s why we started Wildwind in the first place. So I guess maybe I can ask you, what do you need to repent for? Where are you coasting? What mask are you wearing today that you really need to take off if you’re going to free God’s Spirit to move freely in you? Will you do that this week? Will you share it maybe with your small group this week? Will you drop whatever the façade is that you’re holding up and just get real with somebody? Will you tell someone else where you need them to help you be better?
About a year ago I was not feeling well physically, and the illness which had lasted quite a while had brought on a depression I was having a hard time shaking. I felt like I was sinking lower and lower – I didn’t enjoy anything anymore. Preaching was getting increasingly difficult. The passion of my work left me. My family couldn’t relieve whatever burden I was carrying. And one Sunday afternoon I’m sitting downstairs on the couch and Christy is trying to convince me to take a few days off. She says, “So you’re going to stay home for a few days this week, right?” I blew her off in a way that told her I didn’t have any intention of taking time off. So again she said, “I’ll plan on having you home most of this week, okay? You can stay home and rest and read and – maybe just try to get this behind you.” Again I blew her off, except I was getting irritated. So again she said, “Maybe you can have Susie and Dena take care of such-and-such at the office this week – then you don’t have to worry about it while you’re home.”
That was it. I lost it and snapped at her. “Dang, you don’t have to determine my whole schedule this week and figure everything out and try to fix this for me. What the heck, why are you doing this? Why are you trying to control my life and my work this week?” She sat quietly for a moment while I stewed. Then she took my hand in hers and very gently said, “Because you need me to.”
You know what? She was right. Emotionally my life was out of control. I was avoiding certain things in my life by just working more and more. I needed to stay home. I needed to rest. I needed to think. I needed to get away from everything for a few days. And she knew that I was in a tailspin, unable to put the brakes on and step back for a little while to examine my life. Don’t we all need someone in our life who will do that for us once in a while? Don’t we all need a person who loves us enough to apply the brakes when we’re just out of control and unwilling, or unable, to do it for ourselves?
That’s what I want to do for you this morning. I want to apply the brakes for you. I think that’s one of a pastor’s principle callings, because you need me to. But I cannot do that in good conscience during a time when I have been struggling with similar issues in my own life without first admitting to you where I have been struggling and asking your forgiveness. Trusting that you grant me that forgiveness, I want to have us all just step back and look at our lives – look at God – find out where we are in relationship to Him – see where we might need to get back on track.
We’re a fairly young church, but not so young as to have not developed certain ways of doing things – things you can count on – like the band, like a weekly sermon from me, like a great program for your children, like coffee and maybe some donuts or something. I preach and you sit and listen – you maybe sing when it’s time to sing, sit quietly when it’s time to sit quietly, come in and get your coffee and make your way to the place where you usually sit – because yes, most of you have places where you “usually” sit. We are creatures of habit.
Our habits comfort us. Our habits keep us from the instability of change, which brings fear. Our habits build walls of security around us. And eventually some of our habits become ruts that box us in and keep us from seeing the truth about who we are. They keep us busy when we should be still, talking when we should be quiet, buying more stuff when we should be simplifying our lives. I’ve repented to you this morning about some of those ruts I’ve been in in the last little while. Not being quiet enough, not listening to God, not praying like I should, not spending enough time in God’s Word.
You know fundamentally I believe that to be a pastor is to stand guard over the things that matter most about being human. It is to say, “Folks, I will remind you of the supreme reality of God. I will try to help you see through the smokescreens that present themselves to you in this world, things that try to pass themselves off as urgent, important, or even just worthy of your time – from excuses that disguise themselves as reasons. You are busy – you are working in the marketplace and going to school and raising families, and you have appointed me to continually remind you of what you know in the quietness of your own heart is most important – GOD IS.” That’s why it’s so important that I stay where I need to be, so I can continue to remind you of what you most deeply need to remember.
So I come to you today to remind you – and me! – of the reality that GOD IS. God is more important than my sermons – God stands beyond and above even the best ones. God is more important than our worship – He cannot be fully contained or expressed in our highest praise. God is more important than our fellowship, as awesome as that is and as important as it is in our lives. We come together each week and set up the PA and the chairs and the puppet stage and the coffee table. We speak to one another and give hugs and express our sympathies to those who are hurting and struggling, and we celebrate successes and victories.
And as necessary and important – even spiritual – as all that is, God can sometimes get lost in the shuffle and the routine. Sometimes we look inside ourselves and discover that the place for God in our lives is about 90 minutes wide on Sundays, and for some of us another 2 hours wide when our small group meets – and we sometimes barely acknowledge God the rest of the time. Sometimes our best efforts to worship God in church contribute to a sense that we’ve got this God-thing down, that God is in our back pocket somehow. We come together on Sundays to express the inexpressible. So what happens on those days we feel we did a pretty good job? Did we manage to find words in the sermon to express God’s greatness on those days? Of course not. Did we get close in communion to grasping God’s mystery? Of course not. Did we pretty well come to understand God’s love during worship? Of course not – we just might have drifted dangerously close to building our tower too high.
Genesis 11:1-8 (MSG)
1 At one time, the whole Earth spoke the same language. 2 It so happened that as they moved out of the east, they came upon a plain in the land of Shinar and settled down. 3 They said to one another, "Come, let’s make bricks and fire them well." They used brick for stone and tar for mortar. 4 Then they said, "Come, let’s build ourselves a city and a tower that reaches Heaven. Let’s make ourselves famous so we won’t be scattered here and there across the Earth." 5 God came down to look over the city and the tower those people had built. 6 God took one look and said, "One people, one language; why, this is only a first step. No telling what they’ll come up with next?they’ll stop at nothing! 7 Come, we’ll go down and garble their speech so they won’t understand each other." 8 Then God scattered them from there all over the world. And they had to quit building the city.
Here was a group of people seeking God, but seeking God for all the wrong reasons! That’s why I believe that so often we go to church and don’t “feel” what we wanted to feel. God knows that if we get the “rush” we’re looking for every week, pretty soon it’s not God we’re pursuing, but the rush that comes from the pursuit. Subtly, without realizing it, we can pursue God in order to improve our own lot, we seek God for what He can do for us – God becomes another commodity and the church a place that specializes in helping people attain it.
Do you see what I’m saying today? There’s nothing wrong with wanting to reach God – that’s what our efforts are about at Wildwind week after week after week. The question is what for? And what tools are we using to reach Him?
And I’m not saying we have built a tower of Babel here this morning. I’m not saying that at all – but I’m saying that we have to regularly say, “This structure – this church – this tower we are building – what are we doing this for?” These questions I ask you come directly from the questions I asked myself that led to asking for your forgiveness this morning. We have to check our hearts, our intentions, our motives. We have to ask ourselves whether the God we are erecting a church to worship on Sunday is a God we are devoting our lives to Monday through Saturday. We have to ask if we’re just pulling the cranks here on Sunday mornings to keep the gears turning, and then going out into a world where God has no definite place carved out for Him in our lives.
So where is the place for God in your daily life? If learning to think about the world from God’s perspective begins with knowing and understanding God’s Word – the Bible – when is that happening in your life? I’m not asking you to tell me about the Bible study you are doing in small group, I’m asking about personal time in your life when you read the Bible and allow it to shape you as you listen to its words in your heart. Do you know how to do that? Or have I not taught you to do it? If you’re a person with low reading comprehension, have you discovered the easy way to learn the Bible – just one or two verses at a time? Have you worked around your own temperament, your own personality, to find a way to let God speak to you through that book?
Practically all of the longest chapter in the Bible, Psalm 119, speaks of the importance of knowing God’s Word:
Psalms 119:1-16 (MSG)
1 You’re blessed when you stay on course, walking steadily on the road revealed by God. 2 You’re blessed when you follow his directions, doing your best to find him. 3 That’s right – you don’t go off on your own; you walk straight along the road he set. 4 You, God, prescribed the right way to live; now you expect us to live it. 5 Oh, that my steps might be steady, keeping to the course you set; 6 Then I’d never have any regrets in comparing my life with your counsel. 7 I thank you for speaking straight from your heart; I learn the pattern of your righteous ways. 8 I’m going to do what you tell me to do; don’t ever walk off and leave me. 9 How can a young person live a clean life? By carefully reading the map of your Word. 10 I’m single-minded in pursuit of you; don’t let me miss the road signs you’ve posted. 11 I’ve banked your promises in the vault of my heart so I won’t sin myself bankrupt. 12 Be blessed, God; train me in your ways of wise living. 13 I’ll transfer to my lips all the counsel that comes from your mouth; 14 I delight far more in what you tell me about living than in gathering a pile of riches. 15 I ponder every morsel of wisdom from you, I attentively watch how you’ve done it. 16 I relish everything you’ve told me of life, I won’t forget a word of it.
Next question: Have you seen the difference God’s Word can make in who you are becoming? Do you truly believe that this Word from God has the power to transform you into the person God created you to be? I’ve heard many people in our church talk about how they don’t know much about the Bible. My friends, there’s no crime in that. The problem comes in being okay enough with that ignorance not to do anything about it. Recognition of this problem must lead to action to correct it. We cannot obey God if we do not know what God has said. I wish there were some way I could say that that might not sting as much as it probably stings some of you. My intention is not to hurt you – it’s to say what you most deeply need me to say. Is it possible to truly follow Jesus if you don’t know where He went?
Now before you sit there feeling blamed, let me be clear about this. If there are people in our church who have attended for months and months and do not know how to read the Bible, that is probably because I have not clearly taught it to you – and our small group leaders may bear some responsibility as well. Small group leaders, you know you are on the front lines with the people in your groups and you have to make sure your people know how to read God’s Word. The point isn’t to point the finger at me, or at our group leaders, but to make sure you don’t feel too deeply stung – it’s to make sure you understand that it’s our responsibility to teach God’s Word to you and ensure that you know how to read it for yourself. And also, you need to be making us aware that that’s something you need to know, if you struggle in that area.
Now as we close, for a few minutes today, forget about our upcoming TV commercials and outreach events. Forget about how we all wish we had a building. Forget about the personnel holes that still exist in whatever ministry you serve in. Forget about your thoughts about the kids program you saw, or your feelings about our time of musical worship and communion coming up. Ask yourself one question: If following Jesus is about learning to listen to God and obey Him, am I following? Have I learned to read God’s Word and apply it to my life? Or have I grown comfortable with how little I know about the Bible?
Will you thank God with me today that he loves you and me just the way we are and that he will never love us more than he does right now? Will you also affirm with me that God loves us too much to let stay the way we are – to allow us to stay stuck in our ruts, to allow our excuses to masquerade as reasons – to allow our hearts not to be growing more sensitive to His voice every day? Will you pray with me?
God change my heart. Help me not to be numbed by the routines of my life. Give me a heart that is vibrant, alive to what you are saying to me. Give me ears to listen, eyes to see, the will to obey. Please forgive me for getting stuck and staying there. I repent of my reliance on myself. Help me to rely on you.
And we’ll close in a way we never have before. I’m just going to take a moment of silence and ask you to pray for me as your pastor and leader. Pray that God will be real to me, that I will take the time to listen to God and be willing to obey – pray that God would continue to awaken in my heart a desire to know his Word and do his will. Pray that God would give Wildwind the leader it deserves, and that God would make me that person. Would you pray that silently for me?
