Summary: Many men are like King Davis, in that they manage to be good at a lot of things, but yet fail as a father

A Father’s Failure

1st Samuel 18:33 And the king was much moved, and went up to the chamber over the gate, and wept: and as he went, thus he said, O my son Absalom, my son, my son Absalom! would God I had died for thee, O Absalom, my son, my son!

What we have in our text is a good man who is a bad father.

He knows how to be a King, but not how to be a daddy.

He can slay big Giants, but he can’t handle small children.

He knows his way around the palace, but he’s lost in the home.

He is mighty on the battlefield, but he’s helpless in the nursery.

He can wrap women around his finger, but he cannot reach the heart of a son.

Davis is a good man, who is a failure as a father.

He did his best, but it wasn’t good enough.

He didn’t abandon them, yet they suffered from neglect.

He didn’t disown his con, but yet his son did not know he was loved.

He gave the boy what he wanted, but not what he needed.

He indulged him, but didn’t help him.

He gave him a crown, but didn’t give him his love.

David was a failure as a father.

He wasn’t a scoundrel but he was a failure as a father.

He’s not a bad man, but neither is he a good father.

He’s a man after God’s own heart, but a pitiful father.

David has been in many fights and won many battle, but is a failure as a father

He is loved by his people and cherished by his God, but he’s a dud for a dad.

He loves the lord but still failed his children.

What we have in our text is the agony of a daddy and the pain of a father.

“Oh my son Absolom”

This is a bitter cry and an awful scene.

These are the word of a broken hearted daddy.

There are tears in this text that have not been dried by time.

These are the words of a broken heart and a troubled spirit.

This is the cry of a man who can find no comfort for his pain.

This is not the sorrow of a mother this is the agony of a father.

This is the cry of a father that has failed.

Not a King who has lost his crown, but a father that has lost his son.

Not a warrior who has lost a battle, but a daddy who’s lost his child.

Not an investor who’s crashed on Wall St. but a father that forgot to invest in his child.

David gained a Kingdom, but lost a son.

He found his place in history, but found no place in the heart of his child.

David was a successful failure.

He was born on the wrong side of the tracks, and grew up on the wrong side of town.

He was the least in a family of the least likely.

At his worst he was a great sinner and at his best he was a great saint.

He was a loyal friend and a lady’s man.

He had integrity when dealing with a king and weakness when dealing with his own lust.

David wasn’t all-good and David wasn’t all bad.

He did some noble things and committed some dirty deeds.

He slew a wicked Giant, but he also killed an innocent man.

He refused to kill a king that hated him, yet conspired to kill a friend that loved him.

David was a man of Valor and a singer of psalms and slayer of giants.

He moved from tending sheep, to sitting on a throne.

He became King, NOT by right of birth, but by right of ability.

He was a loyal king, an honorable soldier and an eloquent statesman

He took some scattered tribes and created a united nation.

He went from a shepherds tent to a King’s palace.

He went from down on the farm to sitting on the throne.

David Succeeded where he least expected and failed where it hurt the most.

He did what was never dreamed possible, and failed where success was most needed.

David has failed as a father.

No formal charges have been made, but the dead body of his rebellious son convicts him of the crime and condemn him as a failure.

What a shame to succeed in everything and yet fail as a father.

What and irony, to be a blessing to the world and be a stumbling block to your family.

What a contradiction to be loved as a friend yet despised as a father.

How awful to succeed in the world yet fail in the home.

What a shame to be admired by others yet be despised by your own.

What David is in the text is what many men are today… a success in the world and a failure at the house.

Admired by their peers and a stranger to their family.

They do all they can at work to please the boss, and as little as possible at the house.

Many a father has given their child an easy life but not what is essential for living.

They’ll save their child from want, but they never teach the child how to struggle.

Because they have never had a lack, they never learned to be grateful.

Because everything has been handed to them, they don’t know the value of labor.

To many inherit what they should have to work for.

David had more success tending sheep, fighting giants and ruling a nation, and wearing a crown than he ever did raising a boy…David failed as a father.

It’s easier to make a baby than raise one…It’s easier to give him your name than to help shape his life.

It’s easier to bring him into the world than to teach him how to survive the world.

In all of what I’m saying this morning, let me remind you that David loved his children, yet he failed them.

Maybe some of what was wrong with Absolom, was what was wrong with David.

Sometimes, what’s wrong with children is that they are a chip off the old block.

Sometimes fathers forget that children walk in their footsteps.

The Child that took the wrong road started out following daddy’s path.

Before he followed the wrong crowd he was looking up to daddy.

Sometime what the child is doing has something to do with what daddy did.

What they reap has something to do with what daddy sowed.

INFLUENCE

There are little eyes upon you.

And they’re watching night and day;

There are little ears that quickly

Take in every word you say;

There are little hands all eager

To do anything you do;

And a little boy who’s dreaming

Of the day he’ll be like you.

You’re the little fellow’s idol;

You’re the wisest of the wise,

In his little mind about you,

No suspicions ever rise;

He believes in you devoutly,

Holds that all you say and do,

He will say and do, in your way

When he’s a grown-up like you.

There’s a wide eyed little fellow,

Who believes you’re always right,

And his ears are always open,

And he watches day and night;

You are setting an example

Every day in all you do,

For the little boy who’s waiting

To grow up to be like you.

Author Unknown