Summary: Eli failed his son in 3 very distinct ways. What can we learn from his "bad" example?

OPEN: Have you ever had something go “bad” in your refrigerator?

How can you tell when food is spoiled?

Well, one of the first hints might be – when you open the door - it smells like something has died inside. But someone has come up with a list of ways in which we can determine whether our food has gone bad without having to smell it:

* Any canned goods that have become the size or shape of a softball should be disposed of… carefully.

* If you can take Chip Dip out of its container and bounce it on the floor, it has gone bad.

* A carrot that you can tie a clove hitch in is not fresh.

* Potatoes that are edible generally do not have roots, branches, or dense, leafy undergrowth.

* Milk is spoiled when it starts to look like yogurt.

* Yogurt is spoiled when it starts to look like cottage cheese.

* Cottage cheese is spoiled when it starts to look like regular cheese.

* Cheddar cheese is spoiled when you think it is blue cheese but you realize you’ve never purchased that kind.

APPLY: There are number of ways that you can tell you have spoiled food in your refrigerator.

But when it does become rotten… what do you do with it?

You throw it away.

Now that’s appropriate for food, but what do you do when part of your family becomes “spoiled”? What actions should you take when your children start to act “rotten”? What happens when the influences of an R-rated world make too great of an inroad into your family’s life?

That’s the issue we’re looking at here in the story of Eli and his sons.

Jerusalem did not belong to the Israelites at this time (that would take place under King David, some 80 or 90 years later) and so the Tabernacle was set up at the city of Shiloh in the northern area of Israel.

Eli had been the priest of Israel at Shiloh for about 40 years, but he had not been an entirely successful father.

I Samuel 2:12 tells us that “Eli’s sons were wicked men; they had no regard for the LORD.”

Eli’s sons were guilty of terrible sins of disobedience to God and sinning against His people.

Turn with me to 1 Samuel 2:13-17

“Now it was the practice of the priests with the people that whenever anyone offered a sacrifice and while the meat was being boiled, the servant of the priest would come with a three-pronged fork in his hand. He would plunge it into the pan or kettle or caldron or pot, and the priest would take for himself whatever the fork brought up. This is how they treated all the Israelites who came to Shiloh.”

This was what was required under the law. This was how things were supposed to be done…

“But even before the fat was burned, the servant of the priest would come and say to the man who was sacrificing, ‘Give the priest some meat to roast; he won’t accept boiled meat from you, but only raw.’

If the man said to him, ‘Let the fat be burned up first, and then take whatever you want,’ the servant would then answer, ‘No, hand it over now; if you don’t, I’ll take it by force.’

This sin of the young men was very great in the LORD’s sight, for they were treating the LORD’s offering with contempt.”

They were stealing from the offerings people were making to God

In addition, 1 Samuel 2:22 tells us that Eli’s sons:

“…slept with the women who served at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting.”

Basically we’re being told that these boys of Eli’s were not nice men!

A preacher by the name of Victor Yap has observed:

”They forced themselves upon the meat of the temple, the ladies at the temple, and the goodwill of the worshippers. God’s people were abused, God’s place was desecrated, and God’s provision was stolen.”

God was so displeased with their behavior, He sent a prophet warning Eli to take action.

But Eli didn’t take action… all he did was talk

“… he said to (his boys), ‘Why do you do such things? I hear from all the people about these wicked deeds of yours. No, my sons; it is not a good report that I hear spreading among the LORD’s people.’” 1 Samuel 2:23-24

What difference did Eli’s words make??? ---- None

1 Samuel 2:25 says “His sons… did not listen to their father’s rebuke, for it was the LORD’s will to put them to death.”

Could Eli have done anything to change his sons’ destiny ? Could he have done anything to have saved their lives?

I don’t know (I mean Scripture says God’s mind was pretty well made up) but I’d LIKE to think Eli would have at least tried to shake his kids up.

ILLUS: I was impressed by the story of an Amish man who caught his two boys drinking beer at a local tavern. The disappointed father promptly disciplined his sons. He told them “I’ll take the horse home boys… and you bring the buggy.”

That father did something to deal with his sons’ sins… but Eli didn’t.

Eli could have done something… But he didn’t do anything… to STOP his boys from their behavior. He just gave them a “good talking to”. And ultimately his inaction led to their tragic deaths.

God tells us that if we want what is best for our children when they’re rebellious and disobedient we’ve got to do more than talk.

Proverbs warns us to “Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.” (Prov. 19:18).

ILLUS: In a previous church, there was a deacon (we’ll call him Harry) stepping out on his wife. He was an adulterer. Now Harry had a cousin who was the “head” elder of that congregation. That Elder happened to be on vacation in Florida for about 3 months when I found out about Harry’s “lifestyle” and (together with the somewhat reluctant assistance of the other 2 elders) removed him from his deaconship.

But when Harry’s cousin returned from Florida he wasn’t pleased, and he set about rallying the Church Board to Harry’s defense. They reinstated him even though he hadn’t repented. I later found out that practically everybody in town knew Harry was an adulterer… including that church Board.

Now Harry’s cousin – the leading Elder in that church – may have thought he was doing Harry a favor… but he wasn’t. If Harry didn’t repent (and I don’t believe he ever did) and if he’s now dead (which is fairly likely)… he’s gone to hell. And Harry’s cousin was a “willing party” to his death.

Likewise - because Eli never got the hang of disciplining his kids, he became a willing party to sons’ deaths as well.

But I don’t believe Eli caused his sons destruction ONLY because he didn’t discipline them. I believe Eli led his sons to destruction because of his own example.

Eli had a problem… and we’re given a hint of what that problem was later on in 1 Samuel 4:16-18. There we’re told of the outcome of a battle that Israel had fought against the Philistines. One man flees the fight and informs Eli:

"I have just come from the battle line; I fled from it this very day."

Eli asked, "What happened, my son?"

The man who brought the news replied, "Israel fled before the Philistines, and the army has suffered heavy losses. Also your two sons, Hophni and Phinehas, are dead, and the ark of God has been captured."

When he mentioned the ark of God, Eli fell backward off his chair by the side of the gate. His neck was broken and he died, for he was an old man and HEAVY. He had led Israel forty years.

I don’t think it’s an accident that the Bible tells us that Eli was a heavy man. A commentator by the name of John Gill gives his take on what this meant: Eli was “full of flesh, a very fat man”

Now… how did Eli get to be a fat man? HE ATE TOO MUCH!

And where would Eli get his food? From the sacrifices.

In 1 Samuel 2:29 God rebukes Eli:

“Why do you scorn my sacrifice and offering that I prescribed for my dwelling? Why do you honor your sons more than me by fattening yourselves on the choice parts of every offering made by my people Israel?”

Eli KNEW his sons were robbing the sacrifices. Eli was fat because he shared the food the boys had stolen. He may not have realized how brazen the boys had gotten about it… but he knew and he partook of their sin. He may have even done something like it as they were growing up.

It’s hard to rebuke your kids for sins you don’t want to confront in yourself.

· It’s hard to confront kids who lie when a parent takes his kids to the movies and tries to pass them off as younger than they are so they can get them in at a lesser price

· It’s hard to control child with attitude problems when the parent often loses their temper

· It’s hard to talk to your kids about drugs when you’re drinking alcohol or smoking cigarettes

Now, we need to be honest with ourselves here. There isn’t a person in this building that is without sin. We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Thus, we’re all going to mess up as parents (or grandparents, or uncles and aunts) at some point or other in our interaction with our families.

The problem doesn’t lie in our sinning and failing as a parent.

The problem lies in not owning up to our faults.

It lies in not admitting our sins.

It lies in not asking forgiveness of what we’ve done wrong.

The best way to disarm the destructive nature of your own shortcomings is to own up to the fact that it we’ve been wrong, admit that our action was sinful and then ask for forgiveness.

Proverbs 28:13 says:

“He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy.”

But Eli didn’t do that. He didn’t admit his error. He didn’t forsake his own sin (after all… he was a priest… he couldn’t do that, could he?).

Eli probably just made excuses for why he was like he was and refused to confront himself about HIS OWN failings. And so his sons followed in their father’s footsteps... and they all ended up facing the wrath of God.

And, so Eli failed his sons because he refused to discipline them and because he’d already set a bad example for them...

But ultimately – Eli’s biggest problem was that he loved his kids MORE than he loved God.

In 1 Samuel 2:29 God’s prophet asks Eli “… Why do you honor your sons more than me…?”

Jesus said “Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; anyone who loves his son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me” Matthew 10:37

Now is Jesus saying that we shouldn’t love our kids? Oh heavens no.

God is OUR father. He is our example of how parents ought to love their kids. We’re told in 1 John 3:1 “How great is the love THE FATHER has lavished on us, that we should be CALLED CHILDREN OF GOD! And that is what we are…”

There’s nothing wrong with loving our kids - sometimes we may not do it as much as we should - but the fact of the matter is that:

Whenever we love our children more than we do God… we’re setting our families up for failure.

There are people who try to tell us that they don’t want to “force” their faith on their children. They want them to grow up to make up their own mind about whether or not they want to have their parents’ religion.

That’s a lie fed to us by an R-rated world.

Granted, there is a wrong way to tell your children about Jesus, and there is a wrong way to sell your faith to your kids… but the fact of the matter is – God demands that we guide our children toward God. If we love God, this is not an option.

In Deuteronomy 6:6 God instructs His people:

“These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. IMPRESS THEM on your children. TALK ABOUT THEM when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” Deuteronomy 6:6-9

God expects us to PUSH OUR FAITH IN OUR FAMILIES.

ILLUS: One man once wrote:

I had a "Drug" problem when I was a Young Person and Teenager.

I was "drug to Church on Sunday Morning

I was "drug" to Church on Sunday night.

I was "drug" to Church on Wednesday night.

I was "drug" to Sunday School every week.

I was "drug" to Vacation Bible School.

I was "drug" to the family altar to read the Bible and pray.

I was also "drug" to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bed report card, did not speak with respect, or spoke ill of the teacher or the preacher.

Those "drugs" are still in my veins, and they affect my behavior in every thing I do and say, and think.

They are stronger than cocaine, crack or heroin.

If our children had this "drug" problem, America would certainly be a better place.

Whenever you put your children’s sports/ school / leisure / career/ or whatever ahead of the need for them to see God’s will for their lives… then you get in God’s way and you ultimately hurt your children.

CLOSE: It’s intriguing: set against this backdrop of Eli’s failure to raise his boys properly is the story of another family.

There was a woman in Israel named Hannah – and she was barren. She had no children and she was desperate to have a child. And so Hannah went to Shiloh – to the tabernacle – and pled with God for a son.

“In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the LORD. And she made a vow, saying, ‘O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant’s misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head.’” 1 Samuel 1:10-11

In contrast to Eli’s attempt to protective his sons from God

Hannah was willing to give her son TO God.

Eli’s sons died

Hannah’s son – Samuel – became one of the greatest prophets and leaders of Israel in all the Old Testament

Eli’s sons lost their homes and families to the wrath of God.

Hannah’s boy changed a nation and received the blessing of God

ILLUS: It’s been nearly 50 years ago that a church in Kansas had a sidewalk laid in front of their building. Before the sidewalk was put in, a mother gained permission to do something very special. When the cement was laid, and before it had hardened, she brought her little boy to the church and set his feet in the soft concrete, with the toes pointing toward the church building. I suspect that as that boy grew up, every Sunday they went to the church, the mother pointed out those prints in the cement and reminded her son that her most treasured desire was that he would always put God first in his life.

SERMONS IN THIS SERIES

Raising A G-Rated Family In An R-Rated World

1 Peter 1:17-1:19

Committing A G-Rated Marriage

Ephesians 5:21-5:33

Teachable Moments

Deuteronomy 6:1-6:23

Spring Cleaning

Exodus 12:1-12:28

The Bad Dad

1 Samuel 2:12-2:36

The Faithful Father

Luke 15:11-15:32