How Is Your View From the Bridge?
Text: Gen. 33:1-20
Introduction
1. Read Gen. 33:1-20
2. Illustration: God’s love is like a bridge that makes reconciliation possible. If you take away the bridge, the separation remains. George Herbert said, “He who cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass.” (T. T. Crabtree. Ed. The Zondervan 2001 Pastor’s Annual. Howard S. Kalb. “Forgiveness.” Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 2001, p. 306). The question that no one can escape answering is this: “How is your view from the bridge?”
3. Most of us have had a broken relationship in our life. Whether or not that realtionship is restored depends on how we handle the situation.
4. 2 Cor. 5:18 All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation;
Proposition: God has called us to take the initiative in bringing reconciliation.
Transition: First...
I. Restoring Realtionships Requrires Humility (1-4)
A. Bowing Himself to the Ground
1. Now that Jacob’s transformation has been completed, after wrestling with God, he is finally ready to meet his brother Esau face to face.
2. His transformation can truly be seen in how he handles his meeting with his brother. Notice that verse 3 says "And he passed over before them..."
a. The Jacob before his encounter with God would have chosen to stay behind and bring up the rear.
b. Notice how the text emphasizes the fact that "he passed over before them..."
c. He went from rearguard to vanguard (Hamilton, NICOT - Genesis 18-50, 343).
3. What he does next really shows his transformation. The rest of verse 3 says "and bowed himself to the ground seven times, until he came near to his brother."
a. He shows here the epitome of humility, because the word humility literally means, "to bow oneself low to the ground."
b. Not only does he bow to the ground but he does it seven times.
c. "Bowing seven times indicated a completeness of humility and was customarily done before kings" (Horton, Complete Biblical Library - Genesis, 313).
4. Now we must see that this was not necessarry for Jacob to do.
a. Remember that even though Jacob seeminly weaseled the blessing away from Esau, God had already decided to bless Jacob over Esau.
b. Also remember that God had said that the older would serve the younger.
c. Jacob would have been within his rights to come to his brother demanding respect.
d. However, he came to him in a spirit of humility.
5. Now look at the results of humility: "And Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his neck, and kissed him: and they wept."
a. Jacob could have come to his brother with a "holy than thou" attitude, and it could have caused an escalation of the hostility that his brother had for him.
b. He could have demanded the rights of the one with the blessing, but instead he humbled himself and brought restoration.
c. As a result of Jacob’s humility, "Esau’s hatred was replaced with generosity and love" (Horton, 313).
B. We Must Be Willing to Humble Ourselves
1. Illustration: During the days when Mohammed Ali was a great boxer, he would go around in his arrogance and say that, "He was the greatest." Humility was never his strong suit. One day, back in his prime, he was on an airplane and the plane was ready to take off and the flight attendant had repeatedly told him to put on his seat belt. He finally told her, "I’m superman and superman don’t need no seatbelt." The flight attendant didn’t hesitate a minute but shot back with, "Superman don’t need no airplane either, now buckle up."
2. When we are faced with a strained relationship, we can stop our feet and insist that we are right and they are wrong.
a. This will not ease the strain in the relationship; it will only deepen it.
b. This will not bring you closer together; it will only drive you farther apart.
c. Sometimes it’s not a matter of how it right and who is wrong, but about what needs to be done to heal the relationship.
3. We must do what Jesus did.
a. Phil. 2:5-8 Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.
b. Jesus didn’t humble himself because he needed to.
c. Jesus didn’t humble himself because he had done anything wrong.
d. Jesus humbled himself because we need it!
4. If we want there to be reconciliation we need to be willing to swallow our pride, give up our rights, and humble ourselves before the other person and God.
5. If we are going to be ministers of reconciliation, we must be willing to do what Jesus did.
a. Give up we think we deserve.
b. Be willing to sacrifice our pride for the sake of the relationship.
Transition: In order for reconciliation to take place, we need to be willing to take the first step. Second...
II. Restoring Realtionships Requires Giving God the Credit (5-11)
A. The Children God Has Graciously Given
1. Now we see a vast difference between the two brothers. One takes all the credit for himself, and the other gives all of the credit to God.
2. First we see Jacob giving God all of the credit for what he had acquired.
3. When Esau asked him who was with him, Jacob replied that they were "The children which God hath graciously given thy servant."
a. He doesn’t brag about all that he has, but he gives the credit where credit is due - to God.
b. He accepts that children are not the product of human effort, but are blessings from God (Calvin, Calvin’s Commentaries - Genesis, 208).
c. Notice also that he acknowledges that it was not something that he earned because he speaks of the grace of God.
4. We can also see that in verse 10, Jacob even acknowledges the fact that his brother received he kindly was due to the grace of God. Jacob tells his brother "for therefore I have seen thy face, as though I had seen the face of God..."
a. Jacob’s explanation, that seeing Esau’s face was like seeing the face of God, showed he knew this deliverance from harm by Esau was of God.
b. At Peniel Jacob had seen the face of God and was delivered (32:30).
c. Having lived through that, he then survived Esau. Thus Esau’s favorable reaction was God’s gracious dealing.—Bible Knowledge Commentary
5. On the other hand notice how Esau respnds. When Jacob offers him the gifts, Esau says "I have enough, my brother; keep that thou hast unto thyself."
a. Esau never mentions God.
b. "This is the statement of a person who thinks he does not need God" (Horton, 315).
c. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe in God, but that he simply had no room for God in his life.
B. Give God the Credit
1. Illustration: A man sat down to supper with his family, saying grace, thanking God for the food, for the hands which prepared it, and for the source of all life. But during the meal he complained about the freshness of the bread, the bitterness of the coffee and the sharpness of the cheese.
His young daughter asked him, “Dad, do you think God heard the grace today?” “Of course,” he answered confidently. Then she asked, “And do you think God heard what you said about the coffee, the cheese, and the bread?” Not so confidently, he answered, “Why, yes, I believe so.”
The little girl concluded, “Then which do you think God believed, Dad?”
2. When trying to achieve reconciliation with someone, we must always recognize the hand of God.
3. We must never take the credit for it, because it is only by the leading of the Holy Spirit that we would even desire reconciliation.
a. Left to ourselves we would not seek reconciliation but vengeance.
b. Left to ourselves we wouldn’t want the relationship to be healed, but that the other person would suffer for hurting us.
c. Left to ourselves we would see the other person grovel and come crawling to us on their knees before we would forgive them.
4. However, because of the gentle leading of the Holy Spirit, our hearts are moved with compassion instead of revenge.
5. Because of the Holy Spirit that we realize that only by Christ’s death on the Cross that we can stand before God.
Transition: Christ must always get the praise for reconciliation. Third...
III. Restoring Relationships Requires Facing Reality (12-20)
A. Jacob Journeyed to Succoth
1. At the end of this tender family reunion, Esau tries to persuade Jacob to come and live with him.
2. However, Jacob comes up with every excuse in the book why he can’t go with him.
a. The children are all tired
b. The flocks might die
c. I’ll catch up with you latter
3. As Esau went his way, Jacob went the other way and built himself a home in Succoth.
a. Esau went south and Jacob went west.
b. Jacob paid for the property and put down some roots.
4. He even made an altar there and called it "Elelohe-Israel," which means "God, the God of Israel."
5. Why wouldn’t he go with his brother?
a. He realized that things were never going to be the same between them.
b. Even though the relationship had been healed, Esau was always going to resent Jacob.
c. He knew that some things would never change.
B. No Matter How Hard We Try
1. Illustration: When the now-famous poet Elizabeth Barrett became the wife of Robert Browning, her parents disowned her because they disapproved of the marriage. Their daughter Elizabeth, however, wrote almost every week, telling them that she loved them and longed for a reconciliation. After 10 years, she received a huge box in the mail that contained all the notes she had sent. Not one had been opened! Although these "love letters" have now become a precious part of classical English literature, it’s really sad to think that they were never read by Elizabeth Barrett’s own parents. Had they looked at just one, the broken relationship with their daughter might have been healed.
2. No matter how hard we try, we have to realize that reconciliation is a two-way street, and the other person may never change.
3. We can do all within our power to heal the relationship, but it is up to the other person to respond favorably.
4. We can do everything right, but only God can change the human heart.
5. We must do all we can and then trust God to do what we can’t.
Transition: However, we must be sure that we have done all that God requires of us.
Conclusion
1. Fostering reconciliation with another person requires:
a. Humility
b. Giving God the Credit
c. Facing the Reality
2 God can and does heal relationships, but we must make sure that our view from the bridge is pleasing to God.
