We've released a new version of SermonCentral! Read the release notes here.
Text Illustrations
"To make it possible for everyone to attend worship next Sunday, we are having a special "No Excuses" Sunday:

• "Beds will be placed in the aisles for all those who say, "Sunday is the only day I’m able to sleep in late."

• "Eye drops will be provided for all those who watch TV too late on Saturday night.

• "Steel helmets will be handed out to all those who say, "The roof will fall in if I ever come to church!"

• "Blankets will be provided for all those who say, "The church is too cold," and fans for those who say "It’s too hot."

• "We will have hearing aids for all those who say, "The minister speaks too softly," and ear plugs for those who say, "The pianist plays too loudly."

• "Score cards will be available for all those who wish to keep a record of the hypocrites present.

• "There will be TV dinners for all those who find it difficult to attend church and prepare the Sunday lunch at the same time.

• "One section of the church will be devoted to trees and grass for those who like to see God in nature.

• "Finally, the church will be decorated with Christmas decorations and Easter flowers for those who have never seen the church without them!"

Related Text Illustrations

Related Sermons