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A deacon sent in his apologies for the Sunday morning service, claiming that he was ill with flu. One of the members, however, said he had seen the deacon on his way to a ball game. After the service, the minister went to visit the deacon, "Brother," he said, "I have information that you were not sick at all this morning, but went to watch a ball game." The deacon protested: "That’s a vicious lie! And I’ll show you my FISH to prove it!"

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