Sermon Illustrations

DUMB CROOKS

1.) A Circle-K convenience store was patronized by man requesting change for a twenty dollar bill. As soon as the register drawer was opened, the man pulled a gun and demanded it contents. He fled with all dollars of it, but left his original twenty lying on the counter.

2.) A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but he refused and said "Because I don’t believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because he didn’t believe him. At this point the robber took his drivers license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over, and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and he put the scotch in the bag. The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license.

They arrested the robber two hours later.

3.) The television news one night told the story of a would-be holdup man who tried to disguise himself with a bag over his head. A bag!

4.) Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear-gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them, shouting pleas to come out and give himself up.

Related Sermon Illustrations

  • In The United States, You Can Be Fined $5000 And ...  PRO

    Contributed by Gene Gregory on Jun 19, 2004
    based on 39 ratings
     | 2,613 views

    In the United States, you can be fined $5000 and imprisoned for up to a year for breaking an eagle’s egg, you can be imprisoned and fined for stealing a sea turtle egg, and yet our babies are being killed daily with little outcry. It is time we contact our legislators and tell them there must be a ...read more

  • Nba Iron Man A.c. Green Is Married!  PRO

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Aug 30, 2004
    based on 4 ratings
     | 1,928 views

    NBA Iron Man A.C. Green is MARRIED! May 1, 2002 PHOENIX -- Once one of the NBA’s most eligible bachelors, A.C. Green is single no longer. He was married in Los Angeles on Saturday, April 20 to Veronique Green. "I have waited awhile for marriage to take place, but my beautiful wife has been well ...read more

  • Purity Is A Very Important Virtue To This ...  PRO

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Aug 30, 2004
    based on 3 ratings
     | 3,055 views

    Purity is a very important virtue to this 23-year-old singer. Rebecca is a virgin and she says she’ll remain one until she gets married. On her right ring finger, she wears a gold band. During a concert in Colorado Springs, she told her audience: “I’d like to tell you about this ring I’m wearing. ...read more

  • Abstinent  PRO

    Contributed by Paul Wallace on Aug 30, 2004
    based on 3 ratings
     | 1,304 views

    Supermodel Kim Alexis said "I made the decision as a teenager to be abstinent. I wanted to take control of my future. It wasn’t a popular decision then, just like it can be an unpopular decision now. It doesn’t always make me more friends. But the friends I have are true friends. True to ...read more

Related Sermons