Givers And Takers

Givers and Takers

This past week I made a facebook post and the responses really surprised me. I posted “Have you ever been a victim of theft. What was it? Post responses here, please.” The results completely caught me off guard. There were 72 responses in the first 24 hours after posting. I was amazed at how quickly the detailed memories were shared. The answers ranged from bicycles, cash, jewelry, guns, and fishing tackle type things to hearts, time, and life. Some involved family heirlooms, while one mentioned her innocence. One of the most power responses was from my friend Lee Dykes who simply wrote “Cancer stole my father away when I was 4.” A highschool friend shared that time with his children had been stolen during his separation. Another deep response state “I was robbed of my self worth.”

Deep in our souls is the idea of possession and the notion of taking something away is just plain wrong. Things we are ok with giving away are also things that we don’t want taken. It’s not the thing so much as it is the idea that others would harm us and invade the most secret places of our lives.

What’s really disturbing is that we often know our own thieves. Surveys have revealed that most theft comes by way of someone known to the victim. In fact, stores lose more money by employee theft than by shoplifters. People report that the folks who stole from them were friends, colleagues, workers, and family members. Thieves take advantage of the precious relationship afforded by an open heart that opens a door and opportunity. It’s not that we invited them to take; we invited them into our lives and then they took more than just our stuff. They take away our trust in other people.

Sometimes, they are us. I stole a pack of gum from the A&P grocery store when I was 6 years old. I justified it through my childhood logic that because it had fallen off the shelf and was on the ground that it wasn’t stealing. My sister told on me. Then, my dad tore me up and I had to go back the manager and apologize for what I had done. It was a good lesson and one that more people need to learn. Most thieves have justified their actions, just as I had done as a child. We might all do a little soul searching to find out where and who we’ve be robbing.

I’m convinced that thievery is an identity issue; you are a giver or a taker. Thieves are takers. They take our stuff and in the process, they take our sense of security. They rob us of opportunities to trust and open our lives to others. They steal our peace and hope and replace it with fear and guardedness. Givers, on the other hand, seem to invite us to trust again in the goodness of humanity. They share their wealth, time, resources, and relationships. They open doors of opportunity and community not out of selfish gain, but out of a sense of wholeness or dare I say, holiness.

Today, I want to encourage you to turn the tide on stealing. Take a page from God’s playbook, rule 8 “Don’t steal” (Deuteronomy 5:19). Instead, be a giver. Be a for-giver. Let go of those grudges that you’ve held against the thieves in your life and offer them the gift of forgiveness. You will find that you are the one who gains the world and recover your soul. Consider what you have to offer and give. Mind your guardedness and cynicism. None of us have completely clean hands, so give yourself some grace and make amends with those you’ve hurt by stealing their stuff, their time, and their hearts. We’ve all been victims of theft, but we don’t have to let that steal our joy and hope the for the future.

Love one. Love another.

Jack