Sermon Central
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I Heard The Story Of The Minister Who Was Leading ... PRO
Contributed by Lynn Malone on Sep 12, 2005 (message contributor)
I heard the story of the minister who was leading a building campaign in his church and need to raise some additional funds. Sound familiar? One day, the minister was checking the store room (we know this isn’t a story about Benton United Methodist Church because there ain’t no store room!), and he discovered several cases of bibles that had never been opened or distributed. In his Sunday sermon, the pastor asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to go door-to-door selling these bibles for $10 each to raise money for the building fund.
Peter, Paul, and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer. The pastor knew that Peter and Paul both earned their living as salesmen and were quite capable of selling some bibles, but he had serious doubts about Louie. Louie was just a small local farmer who always tended to keep to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Louie just stuttered very badly. Not wanting to be a discouragement to Louie, the pastor decided to let him give it a try.
The pastor stacked each man’s car with bibles after the service, and sent them on their way with instructions to report back in a week’s time. Next Sunday came, and the pastor was eager to find out how each man did. He asked Peter how many bibles he had sold. Peter proudly handed the pastor an envelope and said, “Pastor, I am proud to report I sold 20 bibles, and here is $200 for the building fund.”
“You’re a fine salesman, Peter, and the church is indebted to you,” replied the Pastor.
Then the pastor turned to Paul. “How many bibles did you sell, Paul?” asked the pastor.
Paul stuck out his chest proudly and responded, “Pastor, I’m a professional salesman, and I am pleased to offer my gifts to the church. I sold 28 bibles and here is $280 cash to go toward our new building.”
“Wonderful,” the pastor said. “It is great to have such willing people serve the congregation.”
Finally, the pastor came to Louie. A bit apprehensively the pastor asked Louie how many bibles he had sold. Louie just handed him an envelope. The pastor opened the envelope and to his amazement there was $3,200.00 inside. “Louie,” the pastor exclaimed, “are you saying you sold 320 bibles?”
Louie just nodded.
Of course, Peter and Paul could not believe it. “We’re professional salesmen. Do you mean to...
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Speaking Of Church Attendance, Have You Ever ...
Contributed by K. Edward Skidmore on Apr 4, 2005
Speaking of church attendance, have you ever heard Murphy’s Law for Preachers: Law # 1: If the weather is extremely bad, church attendance will be down. Law #2: If the weather is extremely good church attendance will be down. Law #3: If the ...read more
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Our Persistent Prayer PRO
Contributed by D. Greg Ebie on May 7, 2003
OUR PERSISTENT PRAYER Billy Graham said, “Heaven is full of answers to prayers for which no one ever bothered to ask.” Have faith in the God of the dream; let’s ask God to bring the dream to completion. God’s answer is ready; ...read more
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One Of The Greatest Philosophers Of Our Age Is ...
Contributed by Scott Carmer on Jan 31, 2005
One of the greatest philosophers of our age is Andy Capp. I remember one comic strip several years ago in which Andy is up to his old tricks, always dodging his pastor because he is in the pub and not in church. One day after Andy’s wife Flo decided to take him back after one of his periodic ...read more
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A Member Of Alcoholics Anonymous Once Sent ... PRO
Contributed by Paul Wallace on Aug 24, 2004
A member of Alcoholics Anonymous once sent columnist Ann Landers the following: 1. We drank for happiness and became unhappy. We drank for joy and became miserable. We drank for sociability and became argumentative. We drank for sophistication and became obnoxious. We drank for ...read more
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The Juggler PRO
Contributed by Paul Wallace on Aug 24, 2004
The Juggler A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. “What are those machetes doing in your car?” asks the cop. “I juggle them in my act.” “Oh, yeah?” says the doubtful cop. “Let’s see you do it.” The juggler gets out and starts tossing and catching the knives. ...read more
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