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About 4 years ago my mother-in-law asked me for a manuscript of a sermon that I had preached. They don’t listen to my sermons, so it surprised me and I was very much complimented that they would ask. I sent it to them. The next time we went to see them my father-in-law had circled in red all the times I had misspelled a word. It was the word “used.” Like, “I used to be angry.” I was spelling it “u-s-e.” No big deal, I say it the same way, but he wanted to point that out to me. I was very hurt by that. Why? If one of you would have said that it wouldn’t have hurt, but I thought they were giving me a compliment and they turned it into a put down. And it made me angry because I thought, “I don’t prepare manuscripts to be read by anyone but Scot and me. It doesn’t matter if I spell things phonetically, it is for me to preach.”

But just so you know, I always spell that word correctly now. And Scot doesn’t do it, so when he sends it to me I have to correct his!

But that made me angry. At the heart of anger and jealousy is this need to be recognized, treated special, and paid attention to.

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