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CHURCH NEVERS

6. Never ask an usher to break a $20.

5. Never do a cannonball in the baptismal tank.

4. Never hold a church business meeting on Super Bowl Sunday.

3. Never tell the pastor, "We love your church and we might even come back next Easter."

2. During youth group activities, never bungee jump off the church steeple or play chicken with the church buses.

1. After a soloist of impressive size sings "Love Lifted Me," don’t follow with...

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