Sermon Central
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Humorous Epitaphs PRO
Contributed by John Shearhart on May 16, 2002 (message contributor)
Have you ever heard these humorous epitaphs?
1. “Here lies Anne Mann. Who lived an old maid, but died an old Mann.”
2. “Beneath this sod, a lump of clay lays Arabella Young; who on the 21st of May began to hold her tongue.”
3. “The children of Israel wanted bread, the Lord sent them Manna. Old Clark Wallace wanted a wife, the devil sent him Anna.”
4. Here lies Johnny Yeast- ‘Forgive me for not rising.’
5. “Here lies Butch, we planted him raw. He was quick on the trigger but slow on the draw.”
6. “Under the sod and under the trees, lies the...
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Where's The Faith? PRO
Contributed by Karl Eckhoff on Nov 13, 2003
Blow the trump and ring the bell; Dress it up and make it sell; Fill it with the rich and well; And count the heads. We’re doing well! But where’s the faith? Read the creed and get it right; Hold it fast with all your might; Close the door and bolt it tight; We’ve no need for ...read more
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Martin Luther Once Had A Dream Where He Was In ... PRO
Contributed by Timothy Smith on Jan 29, 2005
Martin Luther once had a dream where he was in his house and saw Jesus coming up the walk toward his door. Luther examined his surrounding and realized that everything was an absolute mess. Clothes were thrown over the furniture, old food was sitting out, trash was everywhere. And he thought, "How ...read more
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Experts Say That 3 People Die Every Second. If ... PRO
Contributed by Joseph Marshall on Aug 25, 2002
Experts say that 3 people die every second. If this fact is true, then 180 people die every minute, 10,800 people die every hour, 259,200 people die every day, and 94,608,000 people die every year. Of the six billion people on earth today, experts also sayt that 2/3 of them have never heard the ...read more
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The Little Boy And The Circus PRO
Contributed by Ely Lambert on Aug 26, 2002
The Little Boy and the Circus A little boy who lived far out in the country in the late 1800s had reached the age of twelve and had never in all his life seen a circus. You can imagine his excitement, when one day a poster went up at school announcing that on the next Saturday a traveling circus ...read more
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During Telemachus' Life The Gladiatorial Games ... PRO
Contributed by Karl Eckhoff on Nov 13, 2003
During Telemachus’ life the gladiatorial games were very popular. People were fascinated by the sight of blood and gore upon the arena floor. And that alone was enough to bring the criticism of bishops and priests from within the church. But worse than all of this was the fact that most of the ...read more
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