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We live in a word of excuses. Here are some complied by the Readers Digest that have been offered for not showing up for work:

"I dreamed I was fired, so I didn't want to get out of bed."

"I was up all night arguing with God."

"A raccoon stole my work shoe off my porch."

"I wasn't thinking and accidentally went to my old job."

"While rowing across the river to work, I got lost in the fog."

"I didn't have money for gas, because all the pawnshops were closed."

"My dog dialed 911, and the police wanted to question me about what 'really' happened."

And for not doing your homework, RD reported on the following excuses:

"Another pupil fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drown."

"My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls."

"I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad."


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