So this is for those of you who are football fans. The following football terms that have been applied to the church:

A Benchwarmer- is someone who does not sing, pray, work, or apparently do

anything but sit in the pew.

A Draw Play – is what many children do with the bulletin during worship.

Half-time – is the period between Sunday School and worship when a few people

choose to leave.

Staying in the pocket – What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the

Lord’s work.

The two Minute Warning – The point at which you realize that the sermon is

almost over and begin to gather up your children and belongings.

Instant replay – When the preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week’s

illustrations.

Sudden Death – What happens to the attention span of the congregation when the

preacher goes into ‘overtime.’ (which of course is after 12:00 noon).

An End Run – is when you get out of church quickly, without speaking to anyone.

A Flex Defense –is the ability to allow absolutely nothing that was said during the

sermon to affect your life.

The Halfback Option – The decision of 50 percent or more of the congregation not

to return for the evening service.

Finally, A Blitz: is the rush that takes place following the closing prayer to beat

the crowd to the local restaurants.