Illustration: Reverse Reasoning

Often when couples meet for premarital counselling, they are entranced in a rosy fog of optimism. Blinded to the shortcomings, each sees only the other’s good points. But as the excitement of the new marriage wears off, they often drift to the opposite extreme and view these same traits as faults. Someone has called this “reverse reasoning,” giving the following examples:

She married him because he was ‘strong and masculine’

she divorced him because he was a very ‘dominating male.’

He married her because she was so ‘fragile and petite’

He divorced her because she was so ‘weak and helpless.’

She chose him because ‘he knew how to provide a good living’

She left him because ‘all he thought about was the business.’

He married her because she was ‘steady and sensible’

He divorced her because she was ‘boring and dull.’

(- H.G.B.Our Daily Bread, June 3)