Medical Terminology Play on Words

Sandy has seen a lot of doctors this last year, and as I’ve tagged along, I have learned a lot of medical terminology. I’m sure many of you, as you’ve had medical issues, have learned some interesting terminology, as well. It’s a strange language, isn’t it, because doctors have their own jargon.

For example, what do these terms really mean?

* Barium – isn’t that what they do to dead people?

* Benign – isn’t that what you wanted when you were eight?

* Carpal – someone with whom you drive to school or work.

* Cauterize – that’s what the guy did before winking at the girl.

* Chiropractor – an Egyptian doctor.

* Dilate – to live long.

* Elixir – what a dog does to his owner when she gives him a bone.

* Intubate – what a fisherman is into.

* Nitrate – what the phone company charges after 5 p.m.

* Varicose – nearby.

* Vitamin – what you do when friends stop to visit.

(“Strange World,” Campus Life, Vol. 53, no. 7; www.Preaching Today.com)

From a sermon by C. Philip Green, Anticipating Advent -- Part II, 12/4/2009