Summary: Love doesn’t sustain marriage, the marriage sustains love
A foundation for marriage.
Matthew 5: 31, 32. 02/22.04
I was reading recently about a man who bought the city garbage dump. He covered it with dirt and began to build houses on the land. It only took a short while for the land to start settling and the houses begin to crumble. The people who purchased the houses found out very quickly there is no foundation over a garbage dump.
Now God has a plan and purpose for our nation and it requires strong families. But our nation largely has rejected God’s plan turning instead to the garbage of those who feel they have a better plan. That actually started several years ago and today we see the destruction of trying to build upon garbage. Today, families have no foundation and they crumble.
Many young people get married today looking for the ideal. It seems in 50 percent of the cases the ideal turns into an ordeal and they begin to look for a new deal only to find out that they have the same problems and hurts. You see, the single person and the married usually have the same problems. The difference is commitment during the time of problems.
In our texts, we find that first of all GOD DESIGNED A PLAN FOR MARRIAGE.
The Pharisees ask Jesus one time, is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for any cause? They had developed a plan that if a wife burned the corn bread the husband could write a letter of divorcement, give her a few pieces of silver and go their separate ways. Jesus answered that question and we find what Jesus had to say in Matthew 19: 4 -- 6. In these verses we have God’s plan for marriage. Look at what they say.
There is a word in this passage I want you to notice and it is the word leave. Now that doesn’t mean he has to leave the country but it does mean that he has a different priority. Listen! Marriage is the highest of all human relationships. That means that it is closer than even the parent-child relationship. Parents train and teach their children to prepare them to leave the home.
Have you ever watched a bird as she coaches her babies out of the nest? The Bible says the Eagle stirs her nest. That means she teaches her eaglets to fly from the nest.
As parents we are to maintain a relationship while working ourselves out of a job. A time when I children will make their own decisions. As children we can do this in a way that won’t be so painful to our parents. A parent will always have a need to be needed.
I want us to notice that God not only designed a plan for marriage but also GOD DESIRED PERMANENCE FOR MARRIAGE.
Now the Bible teaches that God permitted divorce only for one reason, infidelity. God did not command divorce but he did permit it.
God’s ideal is reconciliation even if there is infidelity. The classic example of this is Hosea and his wife Gomer. Gomer wasn’t faithful to Hosea that Hosea forgave her and restored the home.
Listen; there are too many foolish excuses today for divorce. The most used is I just don’t love her anymore. Since the feeling of of love is gone we need to get a divorce. You listen to me, love doesn’t sustain marriage, the marriage sustains love. When we think of love we think of it as emotion. But love is a commitment. Christians do not have a choice and loving. We are commanded to love.
Most couples that are thinking about divorce seldom sit down and weigh out the positives and the negatives in their marriage. Did you know in most cases the positives in the marriages would outweigh the negatives? Why throw away 90 percent positives because of 10 percent negatives? The best choice would be to improve the 10 percent.
We see not only God designed a plan for marriage, and God desired permanence for marriage but GOD DECLARED A PARDON FOR FAILED MARRIAGES.
Divorce is not the unpardonable sin. No man or woman can make their spouse stay with them. You cannot unscramble eggs. If you are divorced, you are not a second-class person. I don’t want you to ever think you are. The woman at the well had been married five times the Jesus spoke to her because of her need. He did not condemn the woman but he did save her.
Neglecting those in pain is wrong. Do you know Jesus?