Summary: We are responsible for loving in a way that is pleasing to God.

Biblical Bedroom Basics

1 Thess. 4:3-5

Oct. 16, 2005 FBC, Chester Mike Fogerson, Pastor


I know this will date me, but I can remember the Emmy-award winning TV comedy called "The Dick Van Dyke Show." I know, I know.. Most of you are not old enough to remember watching it when it was actually broadcast but you may have seen it on Nick at Night. It was a funny show, still is, but in that show, which was in the 60’s, it always had Dick Van Dyke and Mary Tyler Moore, who was his wife, Laura, sleeping in twin beds. Because our culture then, when a show was on TV wouldn’t even show a married couple in bed together. And nowadays the Emmy award goes to shows like HBO’s "Sex in the City," or ABC’s "Desperate Housewives" where several people might end up in a twin bed!

For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; 4 that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, 5 not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God 1 Thess 4:3-5 (NASB)

ETS: God’s desire was for His Children to practice Sexual purity.

ESS: We are responsible for loving in a way that is pleasing unto God.

OBJ: I hope you’ll know these two biblical bedroom basics well enough to teach them to someone else.

PQ: How can you pass on these biblical bedroom basics this week?

TS: Let’s look at two biblical bedroom basics

I The first bedroom basic is monogamy

A Monogamy clip 1:45-2:48

1 Graph 1 ( 3 and 4)

a Graph 2

b People are taking the issue of monogamy seriously

2 Monogamy (mono=one + gamos=marriage)

a Man/woman for one lifetime

b There is a growing movement towards saving oneself for marriage

aa Wait Ware

bb Silver ring thing (Two-hour training, pledge abstinence, get a ring. 40,000 in 10 yrs).

c "Monogamy is in vogue." ~Dr. Drew

B God established marriage as a sacred union between one man and one woman. And He answered and said, "Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, 5 and said, ’FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? 6 "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate." Matt 19:4-6 (NASB)

1 Just as God created marriage, He also created sex.

a Since God created sex, He has the authority to govern how it is used.

b God created sex for two reasons:

aa Continuance of the race God blessed them, saying, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let birds multiply on the earth." Gen 1:22 (NASB)

bb For pleasure of the marriage partners (husband & wife, not your prom date).

2 Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Heb 13:4 (NASB)

a God commands us to protect the purity of the monogamous relationship of marriage.

b What’s the most well-known commandment dealing with sex & marriage (adultery).

aa God’s not trying to steal joy, but rather He’s protecting the joy of sex in marriage.

bb He’s not building a wall to a prison; He’s building a hedge to protect a beautiful garden.

C (IL) I read an account of a gentleman named James Matlock (he has nothing to do with the old Matlock TV series starring Andy Griffith!). James Matlock was a Puritan who lived in New England in the 17th century. Apparently he was placed under church discipline. And the reason was because he wasn’t having sex with his wife. His wife complained to the church elders that her husband wasn’t fulfilling his marital duty to her. They investigated the matter and then excommunicated Matlock. And they told him he would remain under church discipline until he began satisfying his wife’s sexual needs. And most people think the Puritans were prudish and anti-sex! Not at all! They were very biblical in their approach to practical areas of the Christian life.

II The second bedroom basic is be filled with the Spirit.

A 3:34-5:00 Alcohol & behavior

1 Alcohol clouded the judgment of folks’ sexual choices.

2 Graphs 3 & 4

B Scripture directs us to be under the influence of the Holy Spirit.

1 Too many marriages end in divorce court, and only God knows how many husbands and wives live emotionally divorced from one another in the same house.

a Poet William Cowper said the home "was the only bliss of Paradise that has survived the fall."

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