Summary: Man's conscious actions in daily life begged the difference in the posture of women living in modern times.



Dr. Gale A. Ragan-Reid (September 15, 2015)

“Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets” (St. Matthew 7: 12, King James Version [Spiritual Standard---The Golden Rule]).

Greetings In The Holy Name Of Jesus,

My sisters and brothers in Christ, I come to you with the love of Christ deeply woven in my soul, my heart, and my mind of which I speak to you concerning respect for one another, not of the flesh but out of love---the love of God which abides within you [“Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets” (St. Matthew 7: 12, King James Version [Spiritual Standard---The Golden Rule]). Recently, a gentleman---for I hold no evidence against that fact, wrote in a social media forum that one morning he purchased his cup of Joe from a noteworthy donuts shop where he noticed a beautiful lady. He greeted the beautiful lady with “Hello, beautiful.” Then, he told her that when she used her eyebrow liner pencil she missed some spots on her eyebrows, a comment that inflamed her to the point he judged her as having an attitude. Perhaps,---just maybe the comment,--- you missed some spots, sounded like,--- big lips, big but, big bottom, big ass, big derriere, corns on your toes, nappy head, blackie, darkie---even black woman with bad attitude---all the marks of shame and disgrace from a man of your same neighborhood and possibly same kind of upbringing---a mockery of her success out in the world, trying to make her mark in the world, trying to make her neighborhood proud of her and if no one else could excuse her haste in applying eyebrow liner to her eyebrows then she possibly thought he could---she thought he would but she only felt his laughter---his scorn and she only heard his cold comment, “You have attitude.”

How do you not become a sister with an attitude---negative attitude when you are a woman in need of tender loving care and you constantly get rebuked? Is it the chastisement that God speaks of that he gives to his children of whom he so truly loves or is it doing unto others what you do not want done to you? If you want a sister to say you are a fine brother and not notice that something in your care was left undone this morning or hardly done to anyone's perfection or barely done at all, then is it impossible for you to see a beautiful woman and not scoff at perhaps something was left undone or hardly done or barely done at all. Is this not why the holy gospel reading of Matthew says, “Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it” (7:13, KJV). More importantly, without judging the intention to create a hostile environment, I think for a man to say, “Hello, beautiful.” is sufficient without going into the imperfections of dressing up to present oneself to the world---what about seeing her light of Christ---does the missed spot---make her less, darken her heart, confuse her mind. Many people find it difficult to address sensitive issues such as make up, food on your face, something in your teeth, bad breath, passing gas, toilet paper on your shoe, manicure gone bad, pedicure gone bad, hair needing a touch up, simply because of lack of finances, rushed scheduling, feeling poorly, lost self-esteem, depressed feeling, and feeling mediocre towards reaching a higher standard of presentation---exaltation in Christ. Are any of the criticisms truth?

Moreover, a sister of color spoke to me about a nation of people of color---not her nation, she spoke that they judged each other by the color of their skin----light-skinned, dark-skinned and it reminded her of her childhood being born to parents, one light-skinned and one dark-skinned, her siblings came out, some light-skinned and some dark-skinned, she called herself a dark-skinned sister and said her sisters called her, “darkie”----all of those memories made her feel inadequate to attend a wedding of the people of the nation that judged each other by color of complexion---at least she felt that way. She told me I was lighter than she was. At first thought, I did not know what she was talking about because I did


not remember growing up in a family that called each other “darkie”. I heard a comedian on national television say she was over it---”It”---meaning being called “blackie”. As a married adult, I remember “black face” from tanning in the face area too much but in childhood I remember name calling like long head and I remember one of my male siblings made a song about nappy hair---every nap has its own snap and every snap has its own rap and he would go on and on about it, without anyone's laughter. We just heard it. Maybe we did laugh but I do not remember falling out of the chair kind of laughter, maybe more, “You're crazy”---a silent thought made to him---kind of laughter because he was a boy of respect that grew into a man of respect, so some words or thoughts remained silent---went unsaid to the family---held in your heart and mind as private thoughts about an issue.

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