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Summary: Your family is worth fighting for, so learn how to fight.

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Fighting for Your Family Part 3

OPEN: Welcome to Restoration Fellowship Church and our series called “Fighting for Your Family” (notice not fighting WITH your family)

Take bibles and stand up please... REVIEW:

# 1 – THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A

PERFECT FAMILY

# 2 – ONLY FAMILIES THAT LIVE BY GODLY

PRINCIPLES SURVIVE AND THRIVE

# 3 - IT DOESN’T TAKE PERFECTION TO

MAKE A GREAT FAMILY, BUT IT DOES

TAKE WORK

LAST WEEK: we talked about being a

WARRIOR for your family

#1 – Your Spiritual Life Strengthens or

Weakens Every Relationship You Have in the

Family

# 2 - Your Spiritual Life Impacts Your Integrity

in The Home

# 3 – Your Spiritual Life Impacts Your Ability to

Settle Conflict Within Your Family

THIS WEEK: Building a Family that Will Last

TEXT:

Matthew 7:24 “Anyone who listens to

my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person

who builds a house (family) on solid rock.

25 Though the rain comes in torrents and the

floodwaters rise and the winds beat against

that house, it won’t collapse because it (the

family) is built on bedrock. 26 But anyone who

hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is

foolish, like a person who builds a house

(family) on sand. 27 When the rains and floods

come and the winds beat against that house

(family), it will collapse with a mighty crash.”

Have you ever watched as a family collapsed? Sad isn’t it? Often times it’s the marriage first, then the family relationships begin to crumble. Children take sides, two adults, who once said they loved each other, now can’t even stand to be in the same room together. It’s really sad?

So how do we build a strong family and keep that from happening?

Here’s some things strong families have in common:

A Family That Will Last Has.... 1. Strong sense of commitment

 These days of the disposable marriage. “If it works, fine, if it doesn’t, fine...I’m sure it will...I like them!”



 Commitment is the assurance that this family will stay together....no matter what problems we face, we face them together!

 Strong marriages take the following words, and carve them in granite: “I’m committed to you, no matter what. And they take the word divorce out of their vocabulary.

Parents, there’s 2 ways you can convey the sense of commitment to a child:

Ill.—Growing up in our neighborhood I used to play with the older children because my brother was four years older than me. I remember being the last one picked for ball team...who has to take him? I had him last time! (standing there in right field thinking, I’m here because they’re stuck w/ me!)

I read this week about a Suicide note from a

1. Byconveyingtothemthattheyarea

blessing, not a burden.

teenage girl: “Dear mom, I’m sorry I was ever born. It seems to me that I’ve ruined your happiness. I’ve chosen this way out so that you can be happy again.”

(chances are, this girl was genuinely loved and wanted, but somehow they failed to communicate it to her!)

 We live in an achievement oriented society. Where significance equals performance, and importance equals ability, and where self-worth equals achievement. Sorry to say, that mindset has crept into many homes.

 Story of Girl on The Voice: De’Borah (obviously Gay, from a pastor’s home)

 Parents, do your kids know that there’s nothing they can do to be more loved, because they’re already loved w/ a

2. CommunicatingandModeling

Unconditional Love.

measureless love?/nothing they can do to be more accepted, because they’re already totally accepted?/nothing they can do to be more valued, because they’re already infinitely valued?

 Nothing will alienate a child more than making them work for something that should be given freely...love, acceptance, and self-worth.

oIf you raise a child on conditional love, to some degree, always feeling like they have to do something to make you proud of them, you will almost always wind up w/ 1 of 2 results when they’re grown:

1. Workaholic who never feels adequate, but quite self-conscious.

2. A quitter, who just gives up all- together. “I can’t please dad/mom, so I’ve decided not to even try.”

“But, aren’t I supposed to motivate my child?” Yes.

“Aren’t I supposed to encourage them on to

excellence?” Yes.

“Don’t I want them to reach their full potential?” Yes.

The key is: What are you using to motivate them?

Never motivate on the basis of love and acceptance/treatment...they must be given freely.

Never motivate on how they compare to others... “Johnny can do it, why can’t you...try harder!”

Motivate on the basis of what THEIR best is. Did you know you can be proud of your child, even if you’re displeased w/ them?

Ask yourself now:

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